Dreams Come True
by Th' Lady Shadow
Summary: Yuna x Tidus Rikku x Wakka Back and ready for action! How long has it been...? Anyway, this little novelinprogress is a continuation of FFX with enough fluff to stuff a turkey. Enjoy.
1. Back from the Dead

Water...good old water. I hardly felt its difference from air - I could have been floating.  
  
There was little sound, save for the shift and flow of the tide. The water was pungent, salty. That caught the attention of my brain, still in half-sleep mode. Slowly the senses awoke - taste, sight, hearing. There was a distant roar of cheering, the roar of a crowd.  
  
Memory.  
  
Yuna.  
  
I stretched slowly and then headed for the surface, for air.  
  
*I'm...alive?*  
  
*Why?*   
  
*How? Where am I...?*  
  
Zanarkand? ...Doubtful.  
  
My head broke surface, and I took a deep breath, eyes closed. I wasn't sure if I wanted to open them at all, because I wasn't sure I wanted to know where I was. But I knew I had to.  
  
And I saw. Cool blue water around me, and a little bit off into the distance, a ferry.  
  
And then the smooth white of the Luca piers, and the monstrous spherical curves of Luca Stadium.   
  
*Huh?*  
  
Two old fisherman in overalls walked by, carrying poles and bait. One stopped and peered down at me - suddenly I felt scrutinized, as if I had been caught doing something I wasn't supposed to.  
  
"You a blitz player?" He asked.  
  
"Uh huh."  
  
"Hey...so aren't you an Auroch?"  
  
"...Yeah."  
  
"Well then why aren't you in the stadium? It's almost halftime! And if High Maestress Yuna - if the entire Stadium - has to wait for you, you'll never hear the end of it, boy!"  
  
"M...Maestress Yuna?" I felt as if I'd suddenly gone braindead. Yuna, a maestress?  
  
So she was here, and well, and hopefully, happy.  
  
The old man's face crinkled up, glaring down at me. "Are you deaf? Kids these days...egh. Yes, High Summoner Yuna, appointed Maestress - thus, High Maestress Yuna. Don't tell me you don't know who *she* is,"  
  
The other one began to laugh. "As if all of Spira didn't just hear her coronation speech. You kind of feel bad for her, you know?"  
  
"Nn. Yeah."  
  
"Why's that?" I couldn't help asking, my voice hotter than I meant it to be. "She just saved all your lives, and all you feel is pity for her?"  
  
"Jeez, where've you *been*? She lost two of her companions in the final battle, if you haven't forgotten."  
  
The second fisherman's voice was wispy, almost sarcastic. "They say...they say that two sacrifices were made for Spira. Yuna lost Tidus, bless the brave boy's soul, and the world lost Sir Auron. How very romantic. Come on, Jaff, let's go. The fish won't wait, hm?"  
  
"Ya. Get your wits about you, boy, and go watch some blitz. Maybe you'll even see Lady Yuna!"  
  
They meandered off at that point, leaving me stung.  
  
So they knew. Everyone. All of Spira knew what had passed between us.  
  
That didn't bother me - I couldn't have cared less what everyone else thought - but it was that Yuna was clearly bearing the pain from it. That wouldn't do. And yet...in some twisted way it was good to know she missed me, at least.  
  
All I knew was, I had to see her.  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
"What do you mean, I can't get into the locker room? I'm the star player of the Besaid Aurochs! I *have* to get in there!"  
  
I was fighting with the bulky, apparently muscleheaded brute now guarding the Aurochs' locker room. Zesh had been replaced, apparently, and I faintly wondered why.  
  
"Boy, if you were the star player, why weren't you here in the first half? I don't care if you're Tidus' ghost and you'll haunt me for the rest of my days, I'm not allowed to let you in. Rules, kid. Now get back to the stands, the second half is starting soon."  
  
"But..." I paused to think of a good argument, then punched the wall in frustration with the knowledge that he wouldn't believe me. *Oh well, at least I tried...*   
  
"I *am* Tidus!"  
  
He paused, and there seemed to be a glimmer of hope.  
  
Then, he started guffawing so hard that I was surprised he could still breathe.  
  
"You expect me to believe *that,* boy? If you've forgotten, Tidus is dead. Gone. Boom. No more, game over, met his maker."  
  
"Not quite yet!" I couldn't help the triumph in my voice. It was the feeling of being alive when you shouldn't - when you can feel every beat of your own heart, every rush of blood, and it feels damn wonderful.  
  
"Kid, get back to the stands, will you? You're not getting in."  
  
A last desperate attempt to wiggle past the giant failed miserably - he grabbed me by the shoulders and lifted me up as easily as he might lift a feather, thudding out to the hustle and bustle in the front of the stadium, and personally tossing me into the nearest concrete bench. I hit it hard and it knocked the breath out of me, leaving me stunned for a moment or two. Luckily, blitz training had taught me two things: to recover quickly from blows, and that if someone's strong enough to whack you that silly, get the hell away from them and do your blitzing on the other side of the sphere pool.  
  
There was a young woman sitting not too far away from where I made impact, and she came over to me, looking concerned. I noted from her eyes that she was Al Bhed, then tried vaguely to remember the language.  
  
"Yna oui ymnekrd?" She asked. 'Are you alright?'  
  
"Oayr...E'mm pa veha, dryhgc." 'Yeah...I'll be fine, thanks.'  
  
"Rana, mad sa... . . .fyed. . . oui'na...." 'Here, let me... . . .wait. . .you're....'  
  
Her green eyes went wide, and she backed away a step. "Tidus?"  
  
"Oayr. Mecdah, E haat du cbayg du Yuna. Tu oui ghuf ruf E lyh caa ran?" The words just spilled out, hastily but fluently. So what if the world knew I was Tidus - I needed to find a way to speak with Yuna, and damn whoever tried to hinder me.  
  
Her eyes went even wider, as she stepped back towards me. "E tu hud ghuf ruf oui lyh cbayg du ran, pid E ghuf ouin vyla. Oui yna ehtaat Tidus! So hysa ec Ranna."  
  
"Oac, E ys. Rammu, Ranna." I nodded to her, then took a slow breath and sat up straight.  
  
"So pypo cecdan Rikku dymgc ypuid oui y mud. Cra cyoc oui yht luiceh Yuna fana mujanc, hu?"  
  
I paused, soaking that in. The last remark stifled me, almost embarrassed me, but the pride in it was greater. "So you're Rikku's big sister, eh?"  
  
"Oac, Tidus."  
  
"You understand me?"  
  
"Ar...y meddma. Cra cyoc cra fyhdc du lmyf ouin aoac uid vun mayjehk luiceh Yuna. Oui't pacd cdyo yfyo vnus Rikku vun huf," she chuckled. I was slow translating that, but then winced when I did. 'She says she wants to claw your eyes out for leaving Yuna. You'd best stay away from Rikku for now, no?'  
  
She continued, "E lyhhud ramb oui dutyo, pid E tu ghuf frana dra rusa uv dra Myto Cissuhan ec. E lyh dyga oui drana, pid ed'c megamo fa fuh'd naylr ed ihdem dusunnuf sunhehk."  
  
'I cannot help you today, but I do know where the home of the Lady Summoner is. I can take you there, but it's likely we won't reach it until tomorrow morning.'  
  
"Well then let's get going! Mad'c ku!"  
  
She laughed. "E ryja y vaf drehkc du tu pavuna fa mayja, ev oui tuh'd seht. Zicd y meddma crubbehk." 'I have a few things to do before we leave, if you don't mind. Just a little shopping.'  
  
"No problemo. Hey, Ranna...Fro'na oui rambehk sa, yhofyo?"  
  
"Palyica so vydran ec knydavim du oui, so meddma cecdan lynac vun oui, so pnudran bmyoc pmedw fedr oui yht so luiceh mujac oui - bycceuhydamo. Hud du sahdeuh oui cyjat Spira - E vekinat E cruimt tu ymm E lyh du ramb eh nadinh."  
  
"E teth'd cyja Spira ymuha, oui ghuf." 'I didn't save Spira alone, you know.'  
  
"Ur, yht sutacd duu!"   
  
I had to laugh. 'Oh, and modest too!'  
  
"Yeah, I try. So what errands are you running before we leave?"  
  
She paused, then looked perplexed. "Fryd?"  
  
"Cunno...E ycgat fryd annyhtc oui ryt du nih pavuna fa mavd. E's zicd aykan..." 'Sorry...I asked what errands you had to run before we left. I'm just eager...'  
  
"I have to...buy thing."  
  
"Oh, go shopping?"  
  
She shrugged, obviously struggling. "Buy...tools? With to make Home...again."  
  
"Ohh, I see. You need equipment to rebuild Home."  
  
She nodded halfway. "Perhaps...in month, two, perhaps, you come help? I...know...you need with Yuna be, but per...haps after time?"  
  
I nodded. "Sure, I'll help. Let's go, okay?"  
  
We went.  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
With all Luca's shops, it took some time; but Ranna finally found what she needed, and we boarded the S.S. Winno.  
  
"We're stopping in Kilika first, aren't we?" I asked the blonde Al Bhed woman, once we were well out to sea. She must have been twenty-something, for the way she carried herself and the lack of childishness in her manner. Ranna nodded, tinkering with some hand-crafted tool she had in her lap.  
  
I stood up, walking over to the edge of the ship and looking at the whitewater hugging the ship's hull.  
  
*I'll get to see Yuna soon.*  
  
*I'll be...home...*  
  
Yes...Spira was home, now. And even if I could go back to Zanarkand...I didn't think I would. That is, unless I could bring Yuna; I'd miss her too much, as I missed her now. There was little in Zanarkand that I couldn't have in Spira, though the flavor was different. I was a star Blitz player in both worlds; this one rural, the last one technological.  
  
Out of boredom, I tried to imagine how Yuna would look, dressed in Zanarkand's attire. Quiet, strong Yuna...just the thought brought a grin to my lips.  
  
Dark khakis, revealing slim legs and sleek thighs. Then a body-hugging tank top maybe - definitely white - letting the occasional glance take in the soft skin of her stomach.  
  
Then I realized that she'd look just like my mother that way, and felt a twinge of emotional pain. Yeah, I hated my dad, but mainly because he took away what I loved - my mother.  
  
And he almost took Yuna...  
  
Almost.  
  
I didn't count it against him - he couldn't exactly help it. All it did was make me want to be with Yuna even more - there were no imminent critical dangers, so it would make me all the happier to protect her from the little nothings; just to be with her would be enough.  
  
The sky was turning from pure periwinkle blue to just a hint of sunset orange - I remembered the first sunset I'd shared with Yuna out on Mi'ihen Highroad, and how good it had been. Just to sit with her, just to talk to her, to see the shift of her hair and her body as she talked.  
  
With luck, I would share the next coming sunrise with her; and every sunrise, or sunset, after that.  
  
  
  
  
  
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AN: Ok, don't mind all the Al Bhed, there won't be that much later on :P If you can't understand it, I've found a teeny-weeny, handy-dandy spiffilicious translator, which you can download at http://www.telefragged.com/thefatal/albhed.zip (by the way it's not mine o_o;)  
  
I promise, it's teeny! Less than 1 MB! And really cool too *Rikkuish dance* XD I give it a ten! - because I don't use any Japanese characters. If you need, or want, a translator that can do that, I can give you the link to one - just email me! blarghness@hotmail.com  
  
Also, my fanfiction is now available on a website which is listed in my profile. Give it a peek please! :3 


	2. Lament

_A vibrant streak of sun, shooting gracefully through the sea._  
_Intertwining with a soothing beam from the moon, the two lovers cavort and blend into each other to become one. They dance the smooth, slow step of love; then just as quickly the beam of the moon's joy is pulled back into its shining orb, leaving only her dim twilight to sparkle the world with her glimmering tears._  
_And that dream, too, fades away._  
_In its place, a memory:_  
  
_Tidus...slowly fading away. He never could hide himself well - the blind man could have seen that he didn't want to leave us all...leave me. _  
_But still I always ask. _  
_Why? _  
_Why did you have to leave me, alone? _  
_Everyone had always been enough. Lulu, Wakka, Kimahri. And then you came along, and we unwittingly drew ourselves into each other's hearts. _  
_And they weren't enough anymore. I would be with them and still be alone. They will always have their place in my heart - they are, to me, my family. But you, Tidus, have a place in my soul that no one can take. _  
_I can still feel your arms wrapping around me. You were so *real,* my Tidus, even then as you assumed your place as a faded dream. _  
_But you weren't a dream - you cannot feel a dream's arms holding you near, you cannot feel the brush of a dream's hair against your cheek or the heat of his breath against your skin._  
_You had to be real...some way. And yet still you were taken from me. You knew it would happen...you knew. _  
_For how long? How long did you have to face the fact that we would lose one another? That I would lose *you?* _  
_I knew from the very beginning that it was a journey I would not return alive from. Thus, I couldn't expect to feel anything for anyone. But when you found out...that I would die...you wanted me to live. And I wanted to live too, for you. You made me want to do anything but the pilgrimage - 'to hell with Sin, to hell with Yu Yevon, let me just lie here while your arms and your lips tell how you cherish me.' I think those were my thoughts that night. But I knew I had to go on, and so did you. _  
I do miss you so...   
You promised.   
You said we'd go to Zanarkand together - your Zanarkand. You said we'd go back to the Moonflow at night, to see the pyreflies - you promised you'd play blitzball for me. And I knew you'd show off, especially for me. I wanted that.   
You said you'd come running if ever I just whistled. I did, and where are you now...?  
Tidus, I said what I did not out of desperation, but out of truth.   
I love you...   
  
  
  
There were drying tears on Yuna's cheeks when she awoke.   
She lay awake for a long time, brooding restlessly. Then she finally got up, unable to sleep. Noting the time - only four or five AM - she dressed and quietly slipped out of her grand room, careful to close her French doors silently. The floor was marble, cold and uninviting, but if her feet were chilled she hardly noticed it. Winters in Besaid were never mild, and so she was used to it.   
"Yuna." She started at the deep voice, whirling around in surprise before she realized it was Kimahri. "Yuna not sleep tonight?"   
"Oh...I slept alright, Kimahri, I just woke up and can't fall back to sleep. A few minutes of fresh air'll do me good."   
He nodded. "I come with you."   
"No, that's alright."   
"Kimahri Yuna's guardian. Would not be good guardian to leave Yuna alone."  
She smiled halfway. "Thank you, Kimahri, but I just need some time by myself."   
He paused before nodding, slowly. Yuna turned to go, but stopped at his next words; his voice was low and soft, understanding.   
"Kimahri understands. Kimahri knows too that Yuna should not be alone. And Kimahri knows still that Yuna does not want the company of anyone but Tidus. Yuna...needs to heal."  
He was right. "Thank you, Kimahri, you're right in every way. I love you all very much...but..."   
There were soft thuds as padded feet crossed marble, and then his hand was on her shoulder with a giant's gentleness. "Kimahri understands, Yuna. Now go, quietly."   
She nodded and smiled at her guardian, then headed down the grand staircase towards the ocean patio. High Maestress - it was too much for her. Grand clothes, grand people, grand things, all in a gigantic house touching the clear waters of Besaid. They had built this palace in a month and a half - a seemingly impossible feat, but they had done it for their Maestress nonetheless. It was so cold, and so empty, but was the pride of Besaid anyway. It wasn't *her* - it just simply did not match. A simple, warm woman does not belong in an elaborate, cold palace.  
  
Yevon is dead, she thought bitterly. Must I be a god in its place? There are a few firmstanding believers - Wakka, surprisingly, is no longer one of them - but Spira's religion is dying.   
I don't want to build a false fire in the hearts of the people of Spira...I don't want to have to answer to the question, "what now?"   
But I'm going to have to...and the funny thing is...   
I don't know.   
  
  
At once Yuna felt the dampness and freezing cold of an oncoming storm as she stepped outside. The moon and stars lit up the calm ocean, but the telltale stillness said that the seas wouldn't stay calm for long.   
  
I still have the world on my shoulders. I still have people to take care of. My family; my guardians, my Al Bhed cousins. But I don't feel like I can do it. I would, if Tidus were here.   
If.....   
I should stop lamenting so. He's not coming back....   
But I can't stop thinking about him, not for a moment.   
The first time I saw him, he looked just like a sunbeam. He really did. I was disoriented from my first joining with the fayth - all I saw of him was a pastel painting, the tone of his skin, his clothes, and a streak of gold; his hair.   
I sensed something in you, Tidus. I wanted to be with you - wanted you near me. Maybe it was love at first sight - maybe not. I don't know. All I know is that I knew I couldn't let you leave. How embarrassed I was when I told everyone else I wanted you to stay with us; how could I have told them it was because I sensed the earliest embers of love forming inside my heart? I had never felt anything like that before. And I knew I wouldn't ever feel that again.   
So I decided to hold on to it as long as I could; maybe it would grow, maybe it would fade, but the feeling would have been remembered. And it grew, and became something wonderful and dear to me. And to you, Tidus, that I know.   
  
  
She walked slowly down the icy-cold steps to the water's edge, sitting on the edge of the platform that was just high enough to let her legs dangle without touching the sea. Yuna stayed there, silently pondering the slight ripple of the ocean beneath her, and awaiting the sunrise.   
  
With it, maybe she could move on. Maybe it would begin another chapter in her life; without her hero, yes, and with the world on her shoulders.   
But with the world's people holding her up, every one of them with the love of peace in their hearts.  
  
  
  
Well before dawn, the residents of the Besaid manor - Yuna's guardians - were awake and to their daily business. They had been told by Kimahri where Yuna was, and told not to go to her. None of the guardians had understood why, save Lulu - she knew well what Yuna was feeling, and with an understanding nod, repeated that everyone should leave her alone.   
Wakka especially didn't understand - after awhile of hearing his argument, Lu playfully sent her favorite Moomba doll after him, thus casting Silence on the blitz player and adding to his frustration.   
Rikku laughed, poking Wakka continuously. "Whatcha have to say to *that,* huh, Mister Macho Blitzball Player?"   
He tried to talk, but nothing came out - Rikku laughed harder as Wakka stood in front of her, arms crossed, grumbling mutely. Lulu sensed inwardly that perhaps there was something growing between those two - it gave her a little happiness to know that Wakka no longer sought so much to fill Chappu's shoes. Rikku would be good for him, actually - her lighthearted, playful persona did something to everyone. Perhaps she healed them, a little bit at a time, letting everybody know that life wasn't over yet. There were still laughs to be laughed, joys to be savored -- and pranks to be played on unsuspecting blitzball players.   
Rikku cast Esuna on the silenced Wakka, and he got as far as opening his mouth to say something before the young Al Bhed girl leapt onto his shoulders with surprising ease and tugged at his cowlick.   
"*Now* whatcha have to say?"   
"'OW', that's what! Stop it," but he was laughing too, hands gripping her shoes to help balance her.   
There was a knock at the door before Rikku could reply, and she hopped off of Wakka as easily as she'd hopped on, prancing over to the door.   
It took some effort to pull open the grand doors, but when she did, Rikku immediately surged forward and threw her arms around the guest's neck in an ecstatic hug.   
"Ranna!!!"  
  
______________________   
  
  
Author's note: About the beginning of this chapter, Yuna's dream...the sun and moon metaphor stand for Yuna and Tidus. Tidus, with his name's obvious ties to water removed, means 'sun' in one Japanese dialect. On the other hand, the name 'Yuna' translates to 'moon.' Anyone notice that her name even ties loosely with 'Luna,' which translates to 'moon' even in English? I thought this was really neat. 'Wakka' isn't meaningless either. It means 'water.' (As if we couldn't have guessed THAT one :P)


	3. Reunion

Ranna gently peeled Rikku away from her, smiling at all the guardians in turn.

"Dutyo ec y tyo vun cinbnecac."

Today is a day for surprises, she'd said. And with that, Tidus stepped into view behind her, a faint smile on his face.

"It's...good to see you all again," he said quietly.

Lulu dropped her Moomba doll, staring at Tidus with an expression mirroring Rikku's - wide-eyed, frozen.

"Drec ouihk syh," Ranna grinned. "E vuiht kaddehk paydah ib eh Luca."

'This young man,' she'd remarked, 'I found getting beaten up in Luca.'

"Luca!" Lulu had evidently snapped out of her trance. "Then..."

"What?" Everyone seemed to turn to her simultaneously, even silent Kimahri.

"Then you fulfilled a promise, Tidus; a very important one."

*If ever we get separated, just whistle. I'll come running...*

"I know." he stated simply, hiding a grin.

"Then what are you still doing here? You've got to go see Yuna! She's outside; lost in thought, poor thing. Here, take her a blanket, she's been out there a long time." Lulu was suddenly full of energy, grabbing the nearest thick quilt and shoving it into Tidus' arms. Being so close to him, she inched still closer and glared at him deliberately.

"Go see her," Lu instructed under her breath, her voice firm and clearly not allowing comment. "If you mean to stay. We're all glad to see you back, Tidus, but if you only came to stop by, you can leave now. I will *not* let Yuna be hurt that way again."

"Lulu...don't worry, okay?" Tidus nodded, then stepped past her. "I'll not leave her again. I couldn't."

It was a promise - a vow, one that was spoken with such certainty that it almost surprised the dark-haired woman. But then...this was the one thing that would make Yuna as happy as she should be. The tone of Lulu's voice was thick with happiness as she answered, "Good, then. Go to her, Tidus; she needs you."

The sun's rose-pink fingers were just beginning to creep up over the eastern edge of the world. Everything seemed still - the sea did not move, nor did birds fly over the comfortably shallow waters surrounding this grand palace. Tidus dared not make a sound. His steps were slow; deliberate, and almost silent. The dock was short; meant for fishing boats or the like, though none were present.

And Yuna was all too visible, sitting perfectly motionless on the edge of the last plank.

He could never deny how beautiful she was, especially with the first hazes of the sunrise cast over her skin, her hair.

The air was still very cold; so much so that Tidus didn't know how Yuna had managed to voluntarily stay outside for more than a few minutes. His breath escaped in wisps and puffs of transparent white when he exhaled, fading into nothingness as abruptly as they appeared. Even Zanarkand winters had not been so cold.

His fingers tightened around the quilt, his breath catching as he came to a stop right behind Yuna. She looked as if asleep - but her hands gripping the edge of the dock, and the slight way she shifted her position just so, told otherwise. Her skin was several shades paler than it had seemed - she was seemingly white, now that he glimpsed her up close.

Tidus swallowed nervously, almost shaking.

What would she do...?

Cling to him, sob? Look shocked, stand there like a stunned deer?

Push him away?

He opened up the blanket and placed it slowly, numbly around her shoulders. She finally moved as he did; Yuna's head turned weakly, her eyes still closed. 

The sight of her nearly broke him. The fading rivulets of tears still stood clear on her cheeks, and the corners of her eyes glittered with fresh ones, ready to leave their mark as well. She still didn't open her eyes, only turned her head numbly back towards the ocean.

Her hands slowly pulled the blanket closer around her.

"...Thanks..." Her voice was very quiet - hardly a whisper, her voice hoarse from crying. In response, he did the only thing he could manage - stroked her hair, at a loss for words.

"T-..." She started, then choked; a shudder passed over her shoulders. Still crying. "He..."

His heart sank with the realization that it was completely for him that she was in such a state - it was the first intonations of his name that she spoke, before stopping herself.

Tidus sat down close behind her, speechless.

Slowly - cautiously, as if she might break if his touch was any rougher than a butterfly's - he wrapped his arms around her shoulders, holding her back to his chest and pressing his forehead into her silken hair. Yuna made another choked, pained sound; another shudder, then brought her hands up to wrap around his wrists.

"Another dream...s-so many dreams," she whispered, grasping Tidus' wrists more tightly. He at first thought she was referring to him; then realized that all this must have haunted her dreams incessantly since her pilgrimage ended.

*Since you left,* his mind chided him.

*So, she still thinks I'll fade away. Again.* The thought was depressing; with a nervous twinge, he admitted to himself that even *he* didn't know for sure that he would stay.

Only one thing to do.

Take what time you have and make the best of it - to hell with everything else.

His arms held her tighter as he kissed her temple, featherlight. Tidus hid a half-smile, remembering what she'd last said to him.

"I love you too, Yuna. I'm...I'm sorry that I didn't say so before."

His voice seemed to snap her out of her trance - she looked down at his hands, the trademark black gloves and tanned skin. "T-....Tid-"

"Yeah. I'm back...I'm home, Yuna."

She whirled around, surprising him with her sudden burst of speed; all too suddenly her calm eyes were wide, fixed intensely on his. Yuna opened her mouth to say something, then closed it again as his hands closed firmly over her own.

"...How...?" She asked finally, her voice tiny.

Tidus shrugged. "I don't know...does it matter?"

"Yes, it matters! What if you just...go...again?" Her eyes echoed her hurt voice.

Tidus thought for a moment, then grinned. "The only place *I'll* be going is the Farplane, in about eighty years, I think."

"What?"

"What would there be to take me back? The fayth are gone - so are the aeons, and so is Yevon."

"But, if you were just a dream of the fayth -"

"I was real once, wasn't I?"

"I..." She looked hurt. "Just...don't go anywhere...don't leave me again...ever...okay?" Yuna looked down at her skirt, pushing the memory of his absence away roughly.

Tidus couldn't help grinning to himself as he stood up, pulling her with him.

He mocked a bow. "As you wish, Your Ladyship."

She let out a short laugh in spite of herself

"If this is another dream...I'm throwing myself into The Scar when I wake up." She remarked suddenly, sober. He stood up straight, drawing her into his arms and keeping her close.

"You're not throwing yourself off anything, Yuna. Not if I can help it." He paused, placing a finger under her chin and studying her face fondly. "I'm no dream. Not anymore. I'm real this time."

He bent his head and pressed his lips to hers, fitting her gently against his body as his arms wound around her. She returned the kiss; it was not romantic, but consoling and promising, as if saying *I told you 'always,' and here I am. Trust me,*

After a long moment, Tidus pulled his head away with a grin, seeing her lips curved upward in a smile and her eyes still half-closed. "I'm as real as that, Yuna."

"...I love you, Tidus." She looked up and met his eyes, forcing herself to ignore her urge to be shy and modest.

Tidus pressed his forehead to hers, smiling. "I know. I'm glad for it."

"Have the others seen you yet?"

He nodded. "Ranna took me here, and so Rikku's probably busy inside bouncing in circles around her."

"Who's Ranna?"

"Rikku's big sister. Who knew?"

She laughed lightly. "I'll have to ask Cid exactly how many cousins I have. I'm beginning to wonder if there are more than Brother and Rikku - and Ranna now, too."

"Two more!" A different, but familiar voice, this time - full of energy and happiness. Tidus turned his head, instantly embarrassed - the entire population of the household stood watching them eagerly.

"Rikku..." He groaned, rubbing the back of his neck bashfully. Yuna was laughing, though.

"Even *you,* Kimahri. Is that very guardian-like?"

Then, a phenomenon - Kimahri broke out into a grin. "Guardians always watch over Yuna! Always!" And then he laughed, a deep and happy sound.

"That doesn't mean you have to *spy* on me!" Yuna giggled. "And you too, Lulu! And Wakka! What're *you* doing peeking at me? Rikku - I'm ashamed of you!"

"No you're not!" Rikku beamed, causing Yuna more laughter.

"Okay, so I'm not. But still...!"

"What she's saying, I think," Tidus remarked thoughtfully as he slid an arm around Yuna's waist, "is that she and I would like to be alone, so if you'll excuse us -"

"Tidus!" Yuna looked playfully scandalized. "You're in on this with them too, then?"  
"Of course." With that, he siezed her and kissed her enthusiastically for a short moment. After he'd set her down, he gave a self-satisfied grin to the cluster of guardians standing at the door. "That's about the most you're going to see, so stop staring."

Lulu stepped forward, smiling warmly at Yuna. "I don't know about everyone else...but I couldn't help wanting to see lovers reunite. You know? Yuna...just between you and me, don't let this one go. Alright?"

Yuna covered her mouth with her hand, giggling. "Don't worry, I won't."

"What's going on?" Tidus asked, somewhat lost.

"Just girl talk." Lulu waved her hand in a mockingly foo-foo manner, then gave Yuna a hug. While doing so, she muttered something into Yuna's ear - Yuna looked perplexed, then nodded to her guardian and smiled broadly. Tidus couldn't decipher what Lulu had said - but it hardly mattered. Lulu returned to the other guardians, then ushered them away despite many complaints.

"Well..." Tidus looked down at his love. "It's good to be home."

"Home?" Yuna tilted her head upwards toward him with a questioning smile.

"Well, that is, if you'll let me stay here. I'll pay rent, I promise. Or should I move into the Besaid temple and become a monk?"

"No!"

He laughed, then walked past her and picked up the forgotten quilt. "Yuna, you're still cold; here."

As he placed it around her shoulders, Yuna asked, "Where did you...come back?"

"Luca."

"Luca! Then --"

"Mmhm." Tidus planted a kiss on her cheek. "Then I kept my promise,"

"Always?" Yuna questioned suddenly, grasping his hand and meeting his eyes uncertainly. Tidus remembered when he'd first promised that - seemingly so long ago, when he knew his promises could not be completely fulfilled. But he had tried his best to stay by her side, and had done so as long as he could. He nodded, realizing that she was asking this question in full sincerity. If he was to affirm it, he would mean it forever.

He smiled at her, mentally saying his last goodbyes to Zanarkand as he brought her into his arms.

"Always."

__________________________________

^_^; Okay, sorry this update took so long. I tried to make this chapter as beautified as possible, seeing the poignancy of it and all.

Did I do okay...? ;.; *hopeful*

More to come soon.


	4. Out of the Blue

"They're just like little kids," Yuna remarked with a grin later that afternoon, watching Tidus and Wakka from a window. Lulu stood beside her, chuckling under her breath as well at the two boys practicing their 'encounter' tactics for blitzball. The women of the house had moved the brawling blitzers from the living room to the spacious, grassy areas around the back of the house, for fear of them breaking some of the expensive-looking pillars, vases, et cetera.

In truth, their 'blitzball' practice was little more than a wrestling match. Rare was the move that would have actually been *used* in blitzball - it always turned into some competition of strength, some mix of slamming bodies and grunts and taunts and laughter. At the moment, Wakka had Tidus in a headlock; Tidus was bent over and awkwardly trying to trip his opponent, to no avail.

"It must be a...*guy* thing," Lulu remarked, matching Yuna's grin.

"Definitely."

"Yuna, I don't think I've ever seen you so happy."

"I don't think I've ever *been* so happy." Yuna countered, laughing as Tidus finally tripped Wakka, broke free, and sat down heavily on the redhead's stomach with a smirk. It was then that he noticed the two women looking on from the window, and waved sheepishly to Yuna. She twinkled her fingers back, Wakka's insistent complaining and futile struggling making her giggle.

"What's going to happen now, then, Yuna?" Lulu asked simply, looking at her lady.

"You're asking *me?*" Yuna looked back, confused.

"Yes, I'm asking you." Lu tilted her head towards the rutting males; one of them, having caught the attention of the desired female, was now thoroughly showing off. "What about him?"

"Tidus...he's staying, no matter what." The young Maestress replied firmly.

"You'll let him be the center of your life?"

"Lulu, I never implied that...-"  
"I know I'm going to burst your bubble by saying this, and I don't want to say it, because I would want the same thing in your position. But I've got to, so forgive me. Just don't forget that you are High Maestress, which means -"

" ...which means I'm the head honcho, and whatever I say goes, and I have endless decisions to be made." Yuna recited with slight aggrevation. Wakka had given her the same speech not too long ago; only it was about slipping out at odd hours of the night to go sulk and stare at the ocean, then being exhausted the rest of the day. "I've got treaties to authorize, governors to keep an eye on, and with all that I've got to clean up after Yevon and meanwhile find a new religion for the majority of the rest of the world. Trust me, I know my responsibilities, Lulu."

Her guardian winced, sighing lightly. "I must sound like such a nag."

"Well, sometimes."

"Yuna...I'd love to see you just let everything go and simply just *be* with him - I know you want to - but it's my job to not let you. You understand? What guardian would I be if I said, 'Yuna, love, go be with Tidus, and forget all about the rest of Spira.' But that's what I want to say, because so many other people have that..."

Yuna looked out at the two blitzball players outside, who were now holding their hands out to cup the air and evidently remarking on a light drizzle. The brawl was forgotten. Tidus was smiling - he always had the sweetest smile, so serene and joyful. Head arched back to gaze at the heavens, she could see him laugh to himself, and then his lips moved, ever so slightly, in silent speech. 

Thank you...

Dad.

"Everyone has their responsibilities to each other, don't they, Lulu?"

"Yes."

"Do I not have a responsibility to him?"

"Yes, and he has a responsibility to you, too. I don't think he would keep you from being a good Maestress. He'll understand that you have a job to do - if he doesn't, then he's not so bright as I thought."

"It's hard..."

Lulu nodded, faintly smiling. "You'll figure it out in time."

Yuna shook her head, her lips curving upwards wryly. "I didn't mean it that way. I meant it's hard just to be away from him, even to be standing here. I want to go outside and just cling to him, in case he might simply vanish again. Lulu...maybe...maybe I can say it this way."

The young summoner turned to face Lulu, the ghosts of tears in her eyes.

"What would you do if Chappu were to just...reappear? If he just came out of nowhere, simply and solely to be with you...would you deny him that? Deny it of yourself? Even if you had other responsibilities. Tell me, would you?"

Lulu's face went completely and unnaturally expressionless. 

After a long moment, she smiled; but only grimly.

"I...no...I would want the same thing, Yuna. I would. But heaven help me if I wouldn't give him the worst yelling-at he's ever had first."

Yuna laughed lightly, and the tension broke; Lulu chuckled as well. "Yuna, all I'm saying is, don't forget your *other* responsibilities. You've got a conference with the leaders of Spira today; they should be here soon."

The High Maestress nodded, then gave Lulu a tight hug. "You're almost *too* much like a big sister, Lu."

"Yuna, I *am* your big sister, because like any big sister you will *never* get rid of me, no matter how much you want to. Got it?"

Yuna giggled, then nodded. "Got it. Thanks, 'sis!'"

With that Yuna dismissed herself and trotted over to the base of the stairwell. "Rikku!"

"Yeah?" A muffled response came from the second story.

"Come here!"

Within moments Rikku was bounding down the stairwell; once she reached Yuna she landed firmly beside her cousin with a satisfied *thump* of shoe against marble.

Yuna whispered in her ear - Rikku's eyes lit up, and she nodded enthusiastically.

"Yeah!!" The hyperactive Al Bhed cheered, once Yuna had finished explaining. Exchanging a conniving grin, they both fled to some other section of the manor.

Lulu stood confused for a moment, then gave up wondering and headed into the massive conference room to finish tidying it up for the soon-to-be-arriving leaders.

Meanwhile, Yuna and Rikku stood together about to go outside.

"So, you know what to do?"

Rikku nodded, prancing from foot to foot. "Uh huh, you bet!"

"Alright, let's go!" Yuna grinned.

"Wakka?" Tidus spoke thoughtfully, ignoring the rivulets of rain coarsing down his skin.

"Ya?" Wakka was no better - the light drizzle had intensified to a rich, steady downpour.

"Do you think I'm going to stay?"

Wakka looked at his flaxen-haired companion, thinking. "Well, I dunno, brudda, but you'd better - for Yuna's sake."

"You know I wouldn't go if I could help it. I don't even know what brought me back - I don't really care, as long as I can stay. But I can't promise her that. Dammit, why can't I so much as say I'll *be* here and be able to keep my word?"

"Tidus, I think she understands, ya? She may not like it...but she understands. Huh, I wonder why the hell you're back if you're not back to stay." He brushed some of the water away from his hair and face with one hand, but it did little good.

"Me too. Wakka...you know if I stay, if I can...I'm going to end up aski-"

"Wakka! Come on, you lazy bum!" With trademarked perfect timing Rikku came out of nowhere, leaping up to the redheaded blitzball player, feet tossing rainwater with every step. Tidus silenced himself immediately, forcing a laugh as she grabbed his hand with both of hers and proceeded to swiftly drag him away. "Lulu needs help setting up the conference room!"

He watched them go, shaking his head in amusement.

"Tidus."

She'd snuck up on him - he hadn't even heard her coming up behind him. But there she was, hands suddenly resting lightly on his shoulders. He turned around, grinning at her and letting her slip her arms easily around his neck.

"Hey, you." He pressed his forehead to hers, chuckling as he watched rain drip from her nose. "Aren't you cold?"

"Yes, but I'll be fine."

"Yuna...how long has it been? Since Sin?" *Since I left you.*

"One month and eighteen days."

"My, you're rather precise." *You counted. I mattered that much...caused you that much pain.*

"Well..." She shrugged lightly, not meeting his eyes.

Tidus lifted her chin back up, grinning. "Hey, don't give me that face. Let's see some cheer."

A smile crept onto her lips, and she nodded once. "Okay."

He bent his head and kissed her gently, taking his time. It was reparation; asking for forgiveness for the damage unwittingly done with his absence. It was a gentle apology, and a promise of devotion - not of his presence, because he wasn't sure he could promise that, but he could sure as hell promise love.

"You know, if Braska saw you kissing his daughter like that, you'd be dead before you could beg for mercy."

A new voice now, unmistakably hoarse and forever sarcastic. Tidus broke the kiss immediately, jerking his head to the sound of the voice. Yuna's impending prank was forgotten - her hands slid from his neck, gripping his arms.

The figure's outline, too, was unmistakable; standing tall and proud as any warrior, arms crossed in a gesture of impatience and cynicism.

Instinctively Tidus moved in front of Yuna, as if to shield her; his own voice was but a mixture of surprise and apprehension.

"Jecht."


	5. Dominance

"S-sir Jecht!" Yuna's slight gasp told me two things, both in undertones: that this intrusion had greatly embarrassed her...yet her lack of shame told me she wasn't about to start apologizing for the show of affection.  
Jecht.  
Dad.  
Sin.  
"What the hell...?"  
That was pretty much the only thing I could manage to say, pitiful and meaningless as it might be.  
My old man's movements were swift - he moved to us with a few wide strides, then had me by the arm and, for once, met my eyes with sincerity. Danger, too.  
"It's done?"  
Obvious what he meant. Sin; Yu Yevon; the aeons. Surprising though, how Big Bad Jecht's voice was suddenly so...so...  
Desperate?  
"Yeah." I met his eyes motionlessly, setting my jaw. Whether his eyes I searched or tried to stare down, I couldn't even be sure, but there were swords clashing *somewhere* between us. He looked like he was getting ready to say some remark like he usually did. I was expecting something along the lines of, 'You could have been smarter about it, boy' or 'faster with it next time, kid' or some mirthful insult along those lines.  
And then I almost laughed, though I didn't let it show. It was the memory of something I'd just happened to watch on sphere in Zanarkand one day, some thing about dominance. And for once I completely understood it. For me, there were things to protect. Yuna - and my place here, newfound. And I'd be damned if Jecht - the typical intruder figure, of course - just waltzed in here and stole the show. I forgave him and all, but this was my world now. Not his. My place to protect. My...my woman as well. Damn, it sounded so strange to the tongue, but so wonderful at the same time.  
But then he grinned, and the strangest thing happened...  
The hand that had gripped my arm now clapped my shoulder, and the gaze that only held scrutiny, all these years, now held...  
Something else.  
Didn't have a word for it -- I'd never seen it on his face before. But he seemed to be struggling for words.  
Jecht looked down at me, suddenly very sheepish. That wasn't something I'd seen in him before - I watched him, closely. Yuna wisely kept silent.  
My old man rubbed the back of his neck, inhaling in preparation for speech.  
Damn you, old man, just get it over with...  
"I...guess the occasion calls for it. You...I...I mean.......bah. You know what I mean."  
"I have no clue what you mean."  
He sighed, impatient - it was a moment before I realized the impatience was only with himself. "I...guess I'm tryin' to say I'm just -- well that is...er...I mean......damn. I'm trying to say that you're...I mean...I'm proud of you, boy."  
So he'd finally said it. What would have made me so happy when I was a kid.  
Now, all I could do was stand there like a deer stunned by sphere- lights. *Damn you, Tidus - can't you at least say something?!*  
"...Thanks."  
Jecht finally seemed to notice the rather sizeable manor before him, using that to quickly run from the subject. "So when did this thing get built?"  
"Last month, by the Besaid men. Everyone helped out..." Yuna at last spoke up, glancing at me and sending a secret grin. She then proceeded to link her arm through mine, leaning up and kissing my cheek. "And Tidus isn't a day back from wherever it is he went. He just kind of...appeared here this morning."  
That's right, Yuna. You understand. The kiss - the pointed reminder to Jecht that I was here before he was. That I am yours and you are mine, and I have a place here indefinitely. I'll have to thank you later...  
"Actually, I came back yesterday. Luca, remember?"  
She nodded.  
Jecht shook his head slightly, slowly, stifling a chuckle under his breath.  
"...Sir Jecht?" Yuna asked, looking slightly perplexed as she wiped some water off her face - a temporary relief.  
"Mmph. Nothing. So where's everybody else? Don't tell me you live here *alone,* Yuna."  
"Oh, no, my guardians are here too. P-please, come in, they'll be overjoyed to see you..." She bowed quickly, then glanced at me. I sent an invisible look back, and then she smiled and led the way.  
"Why're you back?"  
Well, old man, *you're* certainly still blunt and to-the-point.  
"Why're you?"  
"I asked you a question, kid."  
"I don't know."  
"Neither do I."  
  
"Where'd you come back?"  
"Besaid, near the temple. Away from the village, thank heavens."  
"Why's that? Would've thought you'd take every chance you could get to hold the spotlight."  
Jecht looked slightly miffed, but seemed to brush the resentment off. "Well...I wasn't sure what would happen. Hell, I wonder who's next? If you already got here, and then me...who else?"  
"No one else yet, so far as I know. So...Dad. Why'd you come *here,* anyway?"  
"Here? ...I don't know. I saw this huge house looming over the forest and I thought to myself 'Jecht, you've gotta be dreamin' or something, but hey - as long as I'm in control of the dream, why not check out the one thing that's unfamiliar.' And I find you, blatantly making out with Braska's little girl; it's a wonder I don't -"  
"Yeah, yeah." For once, I managed to look at him sincerely; yes, there was a little anger there too, but this had to be said or he'd never stop chiding me. "I love her."  
"Do you, now?"  
So, he didn't believe me.  
"I don't think I should have to prove my love to her *to you.* Yuna...I'll go to the ends of the earth for that woman, you know? You've gotta know how it must be. Mom idolized you, you know that? Or d-"  
"Don't talk to me about your mother." He said it quickly, fiercely, as if just the mention of her tore him to shreds. Yeah, right.  
"Oh, so she's 'your mother' now? She's not Mommy, not Mom, not even Amia -"  
"Damn you, I had to watch my wife *die.* I couldn't do a thing about it, couldn't...just don't talk to me about it."  
"You act like she wasn't my mother. *I* had to watch her die. *You* were Sin."  
"Never asked to be. Or wanted to be."  
"Doesn't change the fact that you were."  
"Doesn't change the fact that I caused my wife's death."  
"...Hn."  
It wasn't an admission of defeat on my part - simply a wish to drop the damn subject. It was starting to bother me quite a bit.  
Mostly because I could understand where Jecht was coming from. And I didn't want to.  
Didn't want to imagine myself in his shoes. No.  
Couldn't bear putting myself in his shoes. Watching the person I loved most simply fade and ebb away, helpless to stop or prevent it.  
*Isn't that what Yuna went through?*  
No, can't think about it.  
Just don't think about it.  
  
Yuna had gone ahead of us and went inside, but came out a few seconds later; she ran up to Jecht with a wide grin on her face. "Sir Jecht, please, come inside -- everyone's dying to see you. Wakka thinks I'm hallucinating,"  
He nodded briefly, then passed through the open door leading into the manor. Yuna didn't follow immediately - she wrung her hands, looking down at them, then after a long moment turning her gaze to me. "Are you okay?"  
"No," I shook my head. Couldn't help but be honest. "But I guess I'll be alright."  
"Anything you wanna talk about?" She came over to me, taking my hands in hers and intertwining our fingers. We both stared down at our hands, and I knew we both saw how feeble, how simple the link was. She could hold my hands in hers and soothe me; I could do the same to her as well, but it wouldn't save either of us.  
And yet I knew we both saw how important that link was. How we'd not yet lost the novelty of being able to touch each other so; thus how even in this small weaving of hands we clung to one another automatically. I didn't suppose I'd ever lose the novelty of being able to touch her; I knew by now exactly how her skin would feel, how her body fit against my own so easily, but I kept wanting to simply feel her - skin, lips, hair, *her* - to reassure that little part of myself that hoped she hadn't changed since I last felt her.  
She hadn't changed, and that soothed me.  
I squeezed her hands tight for a moment, then leaned and kissed her forehead. "No, not right now, anyway. Just stay close, hm?"  
Yuna's lips curved in a grin. "Always."  
We went inside.  
  
The hubbub surrounding Jecht's return was lively and demanding, asking more of me than I wanted to give. I retreated to a sofa nearer the corner of the living room, letting Yuna and the others marvel at Jecht's guesses at how and why he came back. Jecht, the center of attention. Well, then, let it be. I could deal just fine with pretending to be enthralled with the swords on the far wall and only answering questions when directly asked.  
But there were plenty of other questions too.  
What was it like being Sin?  
Were you conscious?  
Did we hurt you when we hurt Sin's body?  
Did you know Yu Yevon personally, or was he an automaton?  
Did you ever fight Yevon?  
Were you Yevon's slave?  
All the way down to 'So you're telling me you didn't brush your teeth for *ten years!?* EW!'  
Rikku, of course.  
And I was left alone with my thoughts.  
  
Perhaps left alone too long - I must have fallen asleep, for I opened my eyes in a dark living room with Lulu standing over me, saying she'd show me where I could sleep.  
So I got up and followed her upstairs. She directed me to a room across from the one I was earlier told was Yuna's - too sleepy to ask if she had any bedclothes, I flopped down on the luxuriously conforming featherbed and slept. 


	6. Spira Conference

I'd expected the leaders to arrive one by one, in their own separate parades. Instead they came in one giant spectacle - you could have seen the lines of mounted chocobo escorts and carriages from miles away, even in the rain.  
The greatest spectacle of all was of course Cid's entrance, his great airship hovering next to the house just long enough to drop him off. Many of the representatives coming wouldn't recognize the name of Bikanel Island, but I firmly refused to support any segregation between the Al Bhed and the rest of the world. Cid would represent the little haven.  
Kelk Ronso, coming from Mount Gagazet.  
Nav Guado, newly elected in Guadosalam.  
Shelinda, surprisingly, representing Bevelle and its people.  
Maechen, representing the Calm Lands.  
And men and women I'd never seen before, representing region after region.  
Kilika. Mi'ihen. Moonflow. Djose. The Thunder Plains.  
And Besaid - funny thing, how I now had to watch over the priests who raised me.  
Place after place, representative after representative. Would the conference room *hold* this many people?  
I found Lulu fixing up the room when I went looking for her to ask - she assured me it would, then ushered me out to go welcome everyone. Tidus was curled up cat-like, fast asleep on the little loveseat by the window in the living room. So it *was* fully up to me. The rest of my guardians would no doubt appear to join me later.  
So I waited for them to pile out of their carriages. And when they did, I waited in the reception room while Lulu recieved them. She'd graciously cleaned up this room, too, setting out plenty of hot tea and cookies for everyone.  
One at a time they came in the room, ritually bowed in respect, and took a seat on one of the comfortable sofas. I grinned as every one of them showed relief at how comfortable the seating was -- they had expected hard, uncomfortable conference chairs. Once all ten of them had seated themselves comfortably, I began.  
"I welcome all of you to my household." I smiled at each of them in turn; Cid grinned and winked reassuringly. "I hope you find that getting here wasn't a problem?"  
They all shook their heads, murmuring no's with smiles or respectful looks.  
"I had hoped to solely discuss one thing at this meeting; what we are to do about Spira's current lack of a religion. But it seems there are other matters to care for as well. Those I will further explain soon. But first of all I must explain how things are going to work with me." I couldn't help take a deep breath - this entire speech was a breach of every part of my character. It was direct and blunt, whereas I was shy and, to a point, skittish. Openly spoken by a leader - I was not an 'open' person, nor did I see myself as any kind of leader. *I did not choose this job - this job chose me. I just...have to do the best I can.*  
But I had to continue. "As long as I am in office as High Maestress, each of you will have your opinions heard. You are my subordinates, but you are still leaders, and you didn't get there by being foolish. Each of you is affected by my decisions, and each of you will have an effect on my decision as a whole. I must stress that. And...relax. Please. We're here to discuss; you're not in a university listening to a professor's lecture. Have some tea and cookies. "  
They all laughed; the tension was broken. I'd won their trust. Several reached for the available snacks, and I waited happily while they took what they wanted and talked a little among themselves. The one thing I wanted to accomplish here today, if nothing else, was to get them to realize I would not be like the dictatorial Yevonic leaders of years past. I needed them to relax around me - yes, I would demand a certain level of respect, but I could not comply with the idea of simply making them automatons, obediently carrying out the orders of someone who, without the input of those automatons, could not get a full picture of what was going on.  
After letting them make themselves at ease for a few minutes, I cut in by clearing my throat - just as I expected, they immediately fell silent and listened. It brought a smile to my lips.  
"Before we begin assessing the 'religion' subject, there is one more thing I need to ask of you. Be very honest with Spira's people, even if the truth hurts. I would like everyone here to dispel *any and all* rumors or grudges against the Al Bhed, the Guado, the Hypello, or the Ronso. I refuse to tolerate segregation in my Spira. Is that clear?"  
They all nodded in obvious approval, especially Kelk Ronso, Nav Guado and Uncle Cid - those three just downright beamed.  
"Very good. Thank you. Now...I've come to a few conclusions about what we might be able to do as far as any post-Yevonic religion goes. Yevon is dead, so thus is his religion. There will still be some people who believe in him; I say we let them be. It will certainly offend someone if you try to force a different religion down his throat when he doesn't want to be converted. I'm pretty sure Spira's people will want to keep a few of the rituals - the Hymn, perhaps, and maybe even the hand-gestures. I would think it would comfort them - the Hymn gives them faith and hope, regardless of whether Yevon lives or not. They've known it all their lives. Yevon is gone, Sin is dead; so are the aeons. Perhaps we should do something about instilling a new religion in Spira's people - perhaps we should do nothing and see what the people come to believe on their own. What do you all think?"  
Shelinda was first to respond. "I think that in time, people will develop their own religious beliefs again, even without the government's input. But what about the temples?"  
"Ah...the temples. I'd almost forgotten about those. What should we do with them? Certainly not knock them down, the buildings are far too beautiful and precious. There must be uses for them." I commented aloud, then looked to everyone for a response.  
The Ronso leader spoke then, voice somber and deep. "I say we make the temples monuments."  
"To *Sin?*" The young Guado man coughed. "That won't make people too happy..."  
Kelk turned his head to look down at the Guado seated next to him. "To the fight against Sin. So people do not forget. People must not forget."  
I nodded eagerly. "Yes! That's a wonderful idea. Monuments to the fight against Sin -- to the summoners and the victims."  
Maechen looked thoughtful, distant. "...They should tell the story. Each temple will tell the story of Sin, and how Spira fought against it. Yes...the temples shall tell the story - a tale about this thing that happened, a tale about the summoners. They should tell the story of every summoner that brought a Calm. Who their family was - what they lost. Who they loved, who preceded them and descended from them. Who their guardians were."  
"Yes, yes. These are wonderful ideas," It was almost too good to believe - I didn't even dare *dream* that this would go so smoothly. "Are there any objections? Anything to add?"  
"What about you, Yuna?" Uncle Cid spoke up, for the first time. "If it tells the history of the summoners and Sin, what will we say for you? You're not dead; your story isn't finished."  
I meant to smile through my lips, but the only smile that would come out glowed between the eyes of me and my uncle. "That is why we will place me last. We will tell my story as it happens. After that, we leave it blank. The future cannot be written ahead of time, you know?"  
Cid's proud eye-smile spread to his mouth. "That's my girl."  
"Lady Yuna," A voice ventured cautiously, belonging to a middle-aged Al Bhed woman who I vaguely recognized from my trip through the Thunder Plains. "What about Zanarkand?"  
"Mm? Zanarkand....leave that as it be. Leave the Zanarkand ruins as the ultimate monument to our struggles. That's what I say...anyone have any other ideas?"  
"I have this funny halfway-notion," Shelinda thought aloud. "about how it would be if we rebuilt Zanarkand."  
"Rebuilt...heavens, that would take ages. But it could be done," I really wasn't approving of the notion, but I had to give everyone time to let the idea sink into their heads. They would all weigh the pro's and con's wisely.  
Shelinda spoke again. "Yes, it would take a long time. Hmm...yes, I think you were right the first time. Better to let it be. Forgive me, Lady,"  
"No, no, it's good that you all speak your minds - even if the thought is fleeting. If it's of any relevance, say it, by all means."  
"Maestress, if we're going to convert the temples into monuments, who should be appointed to do it?"  
"If there's a temple in your control, I suppose you should make out a plan as to what you think it should look like once it's renovated. Bring it to me, and we'll discuss it from there. That sound alright?"  
They all agreed; obviously still too surprised at their freedom of control to grasp it very well.  
*Balance, Yuna, girl, balance -- don't let them have too much power or they'll take it and run like hell. Don't give them too little or they'll feel oppressed and dictated; then all your work is undone. Careful with this.*  
  
It took a long time to get everything sorted out, but when it was all said and done, I realized that we'd reached the best conclusions to all unanswered questions. They knew it, too, and respected me for it - I didn't bother to reiterate to them that it was all their ideas to begin with. I could not have imagined it going more smoothly. But now I had to lead them over a rocky hill or two.  
"Now that that's all settled...my other issues need to be brought up. I can't explain it very well until you see it...so...will you all please come with me?"  
So the ten representatives got up and followed me curiously through the halls of the house. It was a very short trip to the living room, but it seemed like forever.  
My eyes fell instantly on Tidus, of course, and darted to Jecht, then back to Tidus and stayed there. Some of my fellows saw Tidus first too - others saw his father, lazily lounging on the other sofa. There were murmurs of surprise; gasps; and near exclamations as well, but those were muffled. My Tidus was sleeping, and they would not disturb him. Jecht saw us enter though, and got up to approach us.  
"Sir Jecht..." I smiled, bowing respectfully. "I'd like to introduce Spira's representatives."  
So I did, one by one, and they all bowed to him as well. There were several utterings of the word 'how?', and Jecht answered for both of us.  
"I don't have a damn clue. But I'm not about to complain."  
It was then that I gestured to my lover, dozing in the loveseat by the window.  
"And everyone...Sir Tidus." 


	7. Farplane

A long time ago...I dreamt about blitzball.  
Being better than my father.  
Constantly.  
Then, some time later, I spent my dreams dreaming about going home.  
Eventually those dreams changed into dreams of defeating Sin.  
And soon...all I dreamt about was Yuna. Those dreams lasted awhile.  
Yet those dreams, too, changed. They transformed themselves into one constant, longing wish:  
Don't take me from her. Please. I don't care if I never see Zanarkand again, just let me stay with her.  
  
Now, though, I dreamt about the hellish part after the dreams stopped.  
Farplane.  
It was essentially nothing, just like me...just earthly stones, earthly water, earthly life.  
We were all beyond that.  
  
I was awake.  
Not alive...but awake. I could think and feel and god, the agony...I could see others' thoughts, feel their feelings.  
There was so much pain.  
I could sense the presences of those killed by Sin two weeks ago, and those killed by Sin a thousand years ago...there were some who still wouldn't accept the fact that they had passed into the Farplane. Those souls - pyreflies, really; that's all a soul was, just a pyrefly - felt nothing but confusion, panic. The ones who'd come to terms with it were simply watchful. Souls who still had loved ones lingered close to the realm's earthly entrance, waiting; sometimes those loved ones came, sometimes they didn't.  
No matter how long they'd been here, they felt pain.  
Each day was an eternity; there was plenty of time. I learned that one could focus and reach out to another particular pyrefly. Altogether too soon, I found so many people I knew so well. People who died in Operation Mi'ihen...and friends who died that final night in Zanarkand, when I'd been stolen away from my fate.  
Yes, I was supposed to die then.  
Supposed to.  
It only proves that you can only run from fate for so long before it catches up to you.  
Fate makes you pay for evading it.  
The others couldn't speak, and neither could I. But they knew me, and I sensed their happiness when they felt me. One of them - my best friend Kija, back in the old Zanarkand - managed to relay a question to me in feeling, and it was as if she was standing there before me, arms crossed in that impatient way of hers:  
  
And what took *you* so long?  
I waited for you, but you never came.  
Not for a thousand years.  
What do you have to say for yourself, hmm?  
  
I couldn't tell her why...but I could show her. That one took days of telling - it had to be done through emotion and memory, but I told her my story. Pyreflies did not sleep, they did not hunger, they just...existed. There were no distractions.  
After I finished, I sensed that the soul I called Kija seemed angry.  
  
You don't belong here.  
  
She sent me a memory along with that statement - a view from high atop the Zanarkand blitzball stadium, watching the sphere pool collapse. So she had been in those stands, there to cheer me on that night.  
I watched as she showed me her attempt - and her fatal failure - to escape the chaos that ensued with Sin's first appearance.  
  
Life is unfair. So is death.  
  
We communicated for awhile longer. I had been idly reaching for another presence while she and I talked, and once I found it, she silenced herself.  
I hadn't expected to feel more than one presence, reaching out to someone who hadn't walked the earth for more than a thousand years. But surely enough, sensing my mother's presence, I sensed Jecht's as well. Even in death, the two were inseparable.  
Her shock and surprise were painful. Her sorrow was even more so. But...she seemed happy to see me too. That was a comfort, but only a slight one.  
She'd already been told Jecht's side of the story, so once again, I told mine. Jecht heard it too, but he didn't send me any kind of reaction. He knew somehow to keep quiet.  
It was in the middle of my story that I learned why some of these souls never stopped feeling their pain, never stopped this howling agony of the heart. A new but not unfamiliar presence made itself known to me - but it was different this time. Not a pyrefly. Something close...a resemblance in the soul. But very different. Vibrant.  
Alive?  
Why would something alive make its presence felt in this realm of death?  
People came here all the time, yet no one...no one ever had a presence to any pyrefly. They were just *there,* creatures of a different realm existing for a short time in our own. Sometimes they would summon up an image of the physical body one of the pyreflies once held, but it meant nothing to us. They mattered nothing.  
I reached out to this new soul, investigating - at once I found my answer.  
Yes, this soul's body was alive. The soul, too, was persistent in its vitality...but...there was a feeling of misery coming from it that drowned out any I'd sensed before.  
*What is this?*  
I peered closer, shocked. This was new. This...how?  
The soul was dying. The body was dying - more slowly, but it too was ebbing away.  
How? A soul could not *die,* it just existed, eternally...even when the body had fallen away.  
With a promise of return, I broke the link of concentration with my mother and headed for the earthly entrance to the Farplane.  
The sight of it, unclear and yet sharp as crystal, taught me emotional torture all over again.  
Yuna and Lulu were unmistakable. Just the recognition of their names flooded me with memory.  
Yuna, scrabbling forward towards the edge, while Lulu struggled to hold her back. Her face...covered in tears, the curves of her soft lips - even now, the memory of them was clear - pulled back into an involuntary grimace of anguish. Startled, pained, I tried to send her some feeling of comfort, but she wouldn't hear me. Breaking away from Lulu, she surged for the edge again, only to be recaptured. Yuna's entire body was shaking, wracked with deep sobs.  
Lulu turned her around, her face both angry and deeply worried. She spoke sharp words to Yuna, words that were mute to me. I could read Yuna's lips as she spoke her reply, trembling.  
  
Let me die.  
Just let me die.  
I want to die, Lulu, just let me...  
  
At that she stopped her struggling and crumbled into Lulu's arms, her sobbing redoubled. Lulu gave the best comfort she could, a tight embrace and words I couldn't decipher. A meek comfort was being sent from my mother's spirit - I ignored it reluctantly, not wanting to be soothed. Directly after it came a sense of helplessness; I understood. She could not do anything for me. I couldn't do anything to help Yuna anymore. I could only...watch...  
I sent a feeling of empathy out to all those whose spirits were still crying.  
  
I understand now.  
This is ... torture...  
  
The collective pain lessened marginally at the consolation. They were all aware of this half-soul's presence as well, though I'd chosen to ignore the mass confusion and curiosity. In little surges and sparks, different presences sent little solacing feelings, including my mother, again; Jecht, too. I didn't bother to refuse them.  
Instead I accepted them, let them in, but didn't bother to soak them up. I reached out farther, prying into the dying soul Yuna - what was in her heart?  
I got a simple statement, echoing constantly.  
  
There is nothing left to live for. I am empty.  
I cannot bear life.  
Not without him.  
  
I was getting a strange feeling from my mother again. One that I realized after a moment was just simple recognition...  
She knew what Yuna was feeling. She knew exactly.  
So that's how it was.  
...When a lovebird dies...  
  
*****  
  
My eyes snapped open as my heart thudded uneasily in my chest.  
A dream?  
No, I remember that now.  
Not a dream. Reality.  
Yuna.....  
  
I got up, halfway stumbling in disorientation. It was still the same feeling, only stronger now.  
Stay with her.  
The darkness of the manor's halls was confusing at first, but it wasn't far at all to Yuna's room.  
Never leave her.  
Trying to be as silent as possible, I inched open her doors and slipped in, closing them behind me.  
Make sure she knows how much she means to you.  
Yuna's face was painfully sweet in repose, with just the hint of a smile turning the corners of her mouth upwards. There would be no tears tonight. The peaceful expression on her face made something catch in my throat, made me determined that she should never bear that look of misery and torment that she'd shown in my worst memories.  
Keep her always.  
Tentatively, slowly, I crawled under the blankets and, slipping an arm over her waist, drew her near. This woke Yuna from her sleep, but only halfway; she murmured a mildly surprised 'Nn?' before realizing it was I.  
"Hey..."  
I pressed my lips to her throat, keeping my head in the crook of her shoulder and neck. Her hand came up, and I felt the soothing sensation of her fingers weaving through my hair.  
"I...saw you that day...on the Farplane," I began, refusing to either stop breathing in the scent of her or take my head away from the safe little nook.  
"Uhn?"  
"When...when you wanted to jump."  
She stiffened slightly against me - I could feel her pulse change.  
"Y-you *what*...?"  
"I couldn't call out to you."  
Her hand clenched my hair a bit tightly, but it was from shock, and I didn't mind - there were too many emotions to bother with physical pain.  
"I couldn't tell you to stop..."  
Her next breath of air was taken in shakily; was she crying?  
"I...couldn't tell you you weren't alone. You couldn't hear me."  
She bit her lip, and I knew that if she wasn't on the verge of tears, then she was in them.  
"I wanted to die.....Lulu wouldn't let me." She choked. So, she was crying - but it was silent.  
"I know, love.." I kissed her throat again, holding her more tightly to me. "I'll have to thank her for that."  
"I hated her for it."  
"Well...I'm here, Yuna. I'm not leaving you, I promise." I reached a hand up and blindly brushed away the streaks of moisture on her cheeks. "You've shed too many of these over me."  
Yuna shifted then, moving down to wrap her arms about my waist and rest her head on my chest. "Stay with me?"  
"Of course."  
"...Tidus?"  
"Hmm?"  
"Thank you..."  
"For what?"  
"Everything..."  
"Shh. Sleep."  
"Okay."  
After a few moments, "Yuna?"  
"Yeah?"  
  
"I love you,"  
I could feel her smile against my skin.  
  
______________________________  
  
Okay! I know this chapter was kind of depressing........again. x-x I promise, it gets more lighthearted! I just needed to put this in.  
  
I honestly do think the Farplane and the pyreflies don't get enough attention. Well, *someone's* gotta explain it. ^_^  
  
As for the "When a lovebird dies" reference, does anyone remember when Tidus and Yuna were talking at the Farplane during the whole Seymour- proposing thing? And Tidus was explaining that his neighbor had remarked that 'when a lovebird dies, its mate just...gives up on living'. T_T I thought that was such a sweet statement, and it fit so perfectly. Please tell me how I did on this chapter...I don't know if I should edit and repost or just leave it as it is. There might be a few problems I didn't catch.  
  
Mucho fluff-o in the next chapter. And still more surprises ensue...Bwaha =D So stay tuned! 


	8. Possibility

I dream of lying  
Against your chest  
My body in your clasp  
Disappearing into the evening...  
  
It was difficult to recall a time when I woke up feeling so utterly...*content.*  
I was not faced with death, loss, or any impending harm. I did not have to worry about saving the world. Didn't even have to worry about *running* it.  
All I had to know right then was Tidus' warm-sweet breath in my hair and his arms, forever warm and strong and protecting; his heartbeat, steady and constant and...  
Alive...  
And that was enough to keep me happy for a lifetime.  
I could tell he was awake - or at least half-awake, anyway. He was drowsily tracing his fingers across my upper back, his touch light and almost tickling.  
"Good morning," Just in case he was in fact still asleep, the words were whispers.  
He yawned then, arms wrapping tighter around me to pull me up face-to- face with him.  
"Indeed it is." he grinned, as I reached up and gave him a kiss. "Yuna, do that every morning and I'll die a happy man."  
"Did you sleep alright?"  
"Of course I did, once I came in here. You?"  
And how could I possibly express what it was? How *good* it felt, how honest-to-god *heavenly* it was to fall asleep, safe and warm in the arms of the one you love?  
"Very well," I smiled, though I knew the words didn't sum up half what I wanted to say.  
"Good...that's good." Tidus replied, gently peeling my arms from around him and sitting upright. He suddenly looked very sheepish, halfway apologetic. "I'm sorry, Yuna; I didn't mean to bug you in the middle of the night like that. It just seemed the only thing to do; I won't -"  
"No, it's...it's okay. I didn't mind at all."  
*Do you regret it, then?* I wondered silently. Immediately, the apologetic expression on his face turned to that adorable silly grin of his, giving me my answer.  
"And that's not saying it wasn't wonderful...but it must have surprised the hell out of you, me stumbling here at odd hours to babble about strange dreams and then fall back to sleep."  
"Nn...not really...but you make me worry. You're telling me you saw...*that*...in a *dream?*"  
He shook his head. "Memory. I remember seeing that now."  
"Tidus, how could you *possibly*...?"  
His smile had faded slightly - now it disappeared, as he shook his head. "You don't want to know. Trust me, you don't wanna know."  
"Yes. I do want to know." I tugged at his sleeve, sitting up beside him.  
He looked hesitant. "It won't seem half so terrible as it really is."  
"Just *tell* me?"  
"We never die."  
"*What?*"  
"Yeah, we lose our body, but as far as the *you*, the *I*, the *me- ness* in somebody, it doesn't just...die. You keep on going, forever."  
"I...don't understand."  
"I spent time with my best friend from Zanarkand...and my parents; both of them."  
I didn't have anything to say. It couldn't have been just a dream - otherwise how would he have known that I'd been so willing to throw myself off that cursed ledge? But what he was saying...didn't make much sense. And yet it did. Tidus seemed to sense that I was unsure, and continued.  
"Pyreflies are souls. Pyreflies never die. So...nothing alive ever truly...dies."  
"The dead are *pyreflies?*"  
He nodded. And then he looked at me for a long time, silently, as if considering my presence - or maybe me. Slowly he raised a hand to my cheek, brushing the sleep-tousled hair back behind my ear.  
"Yuna...promise me something."  
"Anything,"  
His expression hardened a bit; his brows furled together, almost in determination. "Never, ever, *ever* do anything like that again."  
I almost found it funny, the way that was the last thing I'd expected him to say. Almost.  
"Don't give me reason to, then. Promise me you won't, and I'll never even *think* of trying something like that again."  
He looked down.  
"I can't."  
My response was immediate, and spoken twice as sharply as I'd meant it to be.  
"Why not?"  
"Because I can't promise I'll stay, no matter how much I *want* to."  
"Promise me anyway." I demanded.  
"That would be *cruel* --"  
"I don't *care,* Tidus!" I could not help how my eyes were daggers on his. Couldn't help how I sounded almost angry, when it was merely a desperate heartfelt pleading. "Because I know if you do go, it's not going to be by your own choice. So *promise* me, and..." I came back to reality in mid-sentence. "...if you really won't...I guess that's okay...too," I finished lamely.  
He was looking at me again; looking at me with that undiscernable expression. I let him, not meeting his eyes; he was silent for a long time, each second lingering like a pin through my heart.  
*He's not going to promise me.*  
*Damn you, Yuna, what were you *thinking?* Demanding that he promise what he can't possibly promise?*  
"I'm...sorry..." After what seemed like hours of silence, I finally muttered my defeat.  
I hardly had time to react before his hand wrapped behind my head, pulling my lips to his fiercely. The kiss was startlingly passionate, and so intense that I nearly pushed him away in reflex. But the drugging heat of his mouth won out; I melted against him almost instantly.  
Tidus stopped after a moment, taking his other hand up to hold me to him. He did not move away at all - his lips brushed mine still as he spoke against my mouth.  
"Yuna, don't be. Don't you dare be sorry."  
Was that a tremor in his voice?  
"I didn't mean to -"  
"You meant every word of it, Yuna. Except the part about it being alright if I didn't promise you."  
He was completely right.  
"I didn't want to impose...I mean...I shouldn't have put you in a position where you might have felt forced -"  
"Yuna..." His voice was a plea, riding on the soft, low sound of a whisper. I felt his hands remove themselves from the back of my neck, and slide down my arms to hold my own hands loosely. Tidus suddenly seemed...*fragile,* for lack of a better word; he was all soft voice and warm body and god, I just wanted to curl up in his arms and never move again. "Yuna...can I keep you?"  
"Unh..? What a silly question to ask...and you don't even need to; I've *always* been yours."  
Something changed in him then - a flat "Oh," of realization escaped him, and it nearly made me laugh.  
"What, you still haven't figured that out?"  
"No, it's not that...I knew." With a last, light kiss, he pulled back. "It's just...I think you took it the wrong way,"  
"Then how was I supposed to take it?"  
"Eh, don't worry about it." He slipped out from between the blankets and stood up beside the bed, lazily stretching. He didn't fool me; he was tense, and just trying to hide it. Those words had meant something to him.  
Maybe an old ritual, from his Zanarkand?  
Seemingly in the same second that thought crossed my mind, I realized exactly what Tidus had meant. It was an unfamiliar way of saying it - I hadn't heard that particular phrase before.  
And suddenly I didn't trust myself to stand. I hardly trusted myself to breathe.  
*My god, he just...*proposed,* didn't he...*  
"...Tidus..." I reached out one hand for him, and he took it to help me stand upright. I met his eyes uncertainly - he held the gaze, his own clear-blue eyes looking so painfully vulnerable it made my heart ache. "I...I think I just took it the right way..."  
A half-smile formed on his lips.  
"I suppose they don't say it that way anymore."  
"N-no...they don't..."  
"Yuna, your face is *beet red.*"  
I didn't say anything - I was incapable of it. Instead I pressed my palm to his chest, feeling his heart racing beneath the skin.  
"Is that your promise, then...?"  
His half-smile grew into a quiet grin. "If you want it to be."  
"But you just said you wouldn't promise you'd stay --"  
"That's right, I can't promise you that."  
"Then...why...?"  
I couldn't understand. He wouldn't promise me he'd stay here, but he could...  
It gave me a strange tingling feeling just to think about it, to form the words in my mind and play around with them like some gleeful child.  
He couldn't promise he'd stay - but he could make me another promise instead, and indeed a better one. How strange it was -- that I was getting granted my most frivolous, childish, selfish daydream.  
When I'd married Seymour, I'd tried to quiet the disgust I felt a little bit. I did that by imagining how it might have been if it were Tidus and not this...*creature,* if perhaps the hands over my shoulders were gloved, human warmth, if the lips ever-light on mine did not seem like ice.  
I remember thinking that Tidus would have been...so warm. Even if the marriage was forced, he would have at least whispered little comforts. 'Smile,' he would have told me with a secret grin.  
He was standing right there, not twenty feet away, and yet still, he could not help me. I remember the firm angry lines of his eyes, his jaw squared, teeth gritted as the wedding bells rang - for anger I could assume, but jealousy? I could only wish. And I did wish it, and that's what it had been all along.  
He took my other hand, placing that on his chest as well, looking down at my arms.  
"In Zanarkand," he began slowly, "to have, to hold, to cherish -- those were for a lifetime. But to keep...that was...forever. Regardless of death, of life or distance...I'm yours, body and soul. Always."  
Always.  
My eyes burned, and his form, so close, was now a tawny blur of tears. Suddenly the word meant so, so much more.  
He'd meant it that way all along, hadn't he?  
Forever was so much longer for him...for one who'd lived in both life and death. Forever took its full meaning in him. And for so long forever had been, to me, simply the rest of my life...  
But it went beyond that now.  
'Regardless of death, of life or distance...I'm yours, body and soul.'  
The words gave me chills. This...this made my request for just his presence sound downright trivial. I think I said something along those lines - or at least tried to, for I choked in mid-sentence and felt myself enveloped in his arms again, my face against his shoulder.  
For the first time in my life, I cried happy tears.  
  
_______________________________________________________  
  
Bwah! Okay. Yay. ^_^ Go Tidus and Yuna. I meant to incorporate some Rikku/Wakka into this chapter (FINALLY! I'm sorry about making you Wakka/Rikku people wait. ;_; I didn't mean to put it off for so long!) but I promise I'll get some in super duper soon (Next chapter I'm pretty sure :D ) And if you don't know... I have an Aurikku piece posted as well now, a short little thing; only two chapters up for the moment. It's kinda depressing (i.e., Auron's NOT alive, it's just Rikku reflecting on him) but not OOC (or so I'm told ^^;). See whatcha think ^_^ More to come soon. 


	9. On The Road Again

"Cruimth'd Yuna pa yfyga po huf?"  
"Nn...I dunno. Say it in Spiran." Rikku grinned at her rather flustered older sister.  
"Fryd?"  
"Cyo ed eh Spiran, Ranna. E ghuf oui ghuf ruf du cbayg Spiran."  
Ranna made an unhappy sound, but complied. "Cr...er, should Yuna be awake by now?"  
"It's 'shouldn't.'"  
"Frydajan."  
Rikku laughed, finishing the little braid she was working on in her sister's hair. "Yuna should have been awake a long time ago."  
"Cdub ed, E tuh'd ihtancdyht oui!" Ranna complained, making Rikku giggle still more.  
"Well it's certainly not *my* fault you can't understand Spiran."  
"Rikku..." Ranna groaned.  
Lulu sighed impatiently, done with her morning's work. She sat stiffly on the couch, obviously tense, obviously hiding concern.  
"Yuna hasn't gotten up yet. And Tidus isn't in his room, so...one can only speculate." She muttered, with a deliberately controlled voice.  
"Ooh! Ooh, that sounded bad," Rikku winced. "Should we risk goin' and gettin' her?"  
"*I'm* not about to risk interrupting anything. But you're free to, if you like."  
"Ah...Rikku...lyh oui *buccepmo* bmayca damm sa fryd'c kuehk uh?" Ranna asked, looking slightly aggrevated.  
Rikku explained, "Lulu cyoc dryd Tidus ech'd eh rec nuus, yht Yuna ech'd ib oad. Cra'c esbmoehk dryd ra'c crynehk ran pat...E fuimth'd lusbmadamo amesehyda dra buccepemedo, pid E tuipd Yuna fuimt tu dryd, hu?"  
Ranna's eyebrow quirked, but she didn't say anything.  
It was at that moment that Tidus and Yuna appeared in the entryway to the room, both obviously attempting to keep a straight face, and both obviously not doing so well at the job. Lulu got up, walking over in Yuna's direction.  
"Where've you *been,* Yuna?"  
Yuna bit her lip and grinned, merely pointing upwards. "Sorry I took so long...I promise it won't happen again."  
"And what about you, Tidus?"  
He merely shrugged, trying to hide a grin.  
"What do you two have to say for yourselves?"  
Tidus rubbed the back of his neck and gave a sheepish laugh, taking his free hand out of Yuna's grasp. "Well, we made good use of the time..."  
Seeing Lulu blanch, Yuna understood how her guardian had taken the statement. Her eyes widened and she laughed behind her hand, blushing brightly and attempting to hide a broad, embarrassed grin.  
"No, no no no no NO Lulu...he didn't mean it like that. I *promise you,* he didn't mean it like that." She giggled.  
  
"Huh?" Tidus looked blank for a moment, then got the joke and blushed as well. "Ah! N-not like that at all...anyway...long story, but we've kinda got a bit of a surprise for you guys; that's why Wakka's hogtied in my room, and why we were so late --"  
"WHAT?!" Rikku screeched, jumping up and leaping to Tidus, eyes glaring death at him. "Why?!"  
Tidus chuckled. "Like I said, we've got a surprise for you guys, but we can't tell you 'til later. Wakka overheard us talking about it, so...we tied him up and made him swear not to tell. Trust me, he won't."  
"Oooooh...I hate surprises! Hog-tying Wakka...ergh! You two are so *mean!*" She kicked Tidus hard in the shin, then ran past him, toward the staircase.  
"Hey...ow...!" Tidus feigned injury, hopping on one foot and cradling his shin in his hands. Ranna was laughing, shaking her head, her dark- emerald eyes glimmering in utter amusement. "E dyga ed so meddma cecdan ryc ran raynd cad uh dra natrayt, hu?"  
Tidus laughed then as well, shrugging. "I guess so. Heh, she'll probably just sit on him until he tells. But she'll be sitting for a long time, because we threatened to cut off his cowlick if he said a word about the surprise. Er...cunno. E cyet dryd fa drnaydahat du lid uvv Wakka'c lufmelg ev ra dumt yhouha ypuid uin cinbneca," he translated. At that, Ranna beamed, laughing lightly.  
"Wakka has...big hair only...to fa--er, only to feel tall. No? Wakka...short. Perhaps better to...what word? Pop? Perhaps better to pop ego of Wakka. Make sure Wakka know smallness of himself. Wakka too teeny to act big."  
Lulu smirked, chuckling as well. "I wouldn't doubt it one bit. Oui'na nekrd, Ranna -- you're right."  
  
Meanwhile, a rather irked Rikku leapt up the stairs, trying to recall what Lulu'd said about where Tidus' room was.  
"Wakka?" she called out loudly. A muffled 'Rirphhue?' came from some room to her left, so she followed the sound down the chilly hall. She repeated his name -- he answered with a more insistent call of his own, however indecipherable the words might have been.  
She found him almost immediately, curled up on his side on the floor and seemingly holding his feet. Rikku then saw the way some of the rope - left over from the house's hardly-completed construction - had been tied so many ways that it looked like an interwoven bird's nest around his wrists and ankles. He smiled seeing her, then jerked his head to gesture that she might untie the short length of cloth covering his mouth. This set her laughing hard - she could just imagine Yuna mischeviously binding him, Tidus holding him still.  
"Looks like they got you good, huh?"  
Wakka looked slightly miffed, but sacrificed a short nod. Rikku walked over to him and undid the cloth muffling his mouth; he inhaled deeply, and grinned up at her. "Thanks, Rikku. They tell you why they did this to me yet?"  
"Well, not the specifics. Just that they've got some 'big surprise' for us. Everyone's wondering what it is -- that's where *you* come in!" Rikku chirped happily. True to form, she flopped heavily down on his side, bringing a breathless grunt out of Wakka. Settling comfortably into a waiting position, she looked down at him eagerly. "Now c'mon, tell me what the surprise is and I'll let you go."  
"If I did, it wouldn't be a surprise, would it? Jus' hold your chocobos, ya? They won't be able to keep their mouths shut for long."  
"Well why can't you just...tell me? I'll still *act* surprised, I promise! Pleeease?"  
"They made me promise not to tell anyone."  
"Oh, what're they gonna do if you do? Yuna wouldn't hurt a fly...well...unless it was a Bite Bug or somethin'...blah, you know what I mean!"  
"They'll gimme a haircut, that's what," Wakka fumed. "Just lemme go already, ya?"  
Rikku mocked pondering a decision, then beamed down at him. "Nope! Not 'till ya tell!"  
Wakka groaned. "I'ma be here a *long* time, then."  
"...Well too bad, y'big meanie! Just tell me!"  
"Awright, awriiiight...Tidus' gettin' her a chocobo."  
"Liar!"  
"Huh?"  
"We've already *got* chocobos, remember? Plenty of 'em! Both Maechen and Shelinda gave us chocobos as gifts when they came. And even if he *was* getting her a chocobo, she wouldn't look *that* thrilled."  
"Uh...it's a white chocobo?" Wakka offered, before having his cowlick tugged good-naturedly. "Ow!"  
"Liar again! White chocobos don't exist."  
Wakka grinned then, and shrugged. "Awright, I lied. I'm still not allowed t'tell. Untie me?"  
"Fine, fine. Meanie." Rikku pouted. Picking through the impossible knots took several minutes, with intermissions for perplexed looks and muttered Al Bhed curses; but with her knack for fixing things, Rikku solved the problem a fair bit more easily than most would have. Once she'd completed her task, she looked up at him with a relieved, beaming grin. Wakka laughed at this, flexed his wrists, and stood up hesitantly with a grunt.  
"Gah, my back hurts like Omega's holy hell," he complained. "Now I know what Mika musta felt like. Old bones, ya?"  
"Should I get you a cane, Grandpa?" Rikku teased. "I'm sure we could make you a machinified wheelchair that just scoots around by the press of a button...or one of those weird walking sticks that functions perfectly as a weapon! Wait...no...that'd endanger *everyone,* knowing you..."  
Wakka took a deep breath dramatically, placing one of his broad hands on her shoulder and looking down at her solemnly. "Rikku?"  
"Huh?" She queried, lost. "What?"  
His expression broke into a silly grin as he bent his head to hers. "Shut up, ya?"  
  
He'd kissed her before - not many times, but enough to...well...enough to what?  
To make her familiar enough with him not to feel awkward, but not to lose the novelty of it, either.  
And it was so strange. Sure, she'd kissed boys, growing up in Home - plenty of boys. None of them - not one - had given her such a funny feeling when they kissed her. Not the strange tingling feeling, like all the nerves on her skin had been given a teeny jolt of energy and hummed with it; not the instant submission, as if she sought to fall into his arms dramatically like some actress in a mushy sphere movie; not even the butterflies in her belly, fluttering at each little movement of his.  
Of course, realism set in, too. It could have merely been puberty that made her swoon, could have been simply that she'd likely been *ten* the last time she kissed a boy, could have been this or that or whatever. And then the girlish, teenage notion that had led her older sister into *her* biggest mistake: thinking maybe it was love. ...Nah...far too soon for that...right? Yeah, way too soon. Maybe later, but not now. No way.  
After a long moment he pulled back; Rikku leaned forward just the slightest bit at his withdrawal, as if seeking out his mouth again, but caught herself and stopped, not meeting his eyes. In response to his request, halfway hoping he wouldn't hear and all the way hoping he couldn't understand, she whispered under her breath:  
"Uhmo ev oui gecc sa mega dryd ykyeh..."  
"...Huh?"  
"Ah--er...nothing." Rikku blushed. "Come on, let's go downstairs. There's lots to do today, and we shouldn't keep Yuna waiting."  
Wakka nodded. Rikku turned and headed for the door - he followed close behind, uncharacteristically silent, but not in such a way that worried Rikku - maybe he was just thinking. He seemed far from bothered.  
"What *do* we gotta do today, anyway?" He asked finally.  
"Well, Yuna's got a lot of thank-you notes to write, but she'll be doing that on the way. We've got to go to Luca again. There's another tournament there, and it'd make lots of people happy if Yuna showed up. Poor Yunie, she's so busy lately...she'll probably introduce Sir Jecht and Tidus formally too. Or maybe she won't. We'll have to see. Security, you know?"  
He made a muffled 'mmmphm' of agreement. "Yeah, wouldn't want anything to happen to *them.* Forget about the Lady Maestress, ya? Just worry about the kid with the weird shorts and his pops."  
She grinned back at him. "You know Yuna."  
"So when d'we gotta get to Luca?"  
"By tomorrow, noon."  
"*Tomorrow?* And how you plannin' ta pull *that* off? Cid's airship is back in Home."  
"Chocobo carriages, what else?" Rikku chirped, laughing. "They've been ready to go since early this morning. They're just waiting for us."  
"Don' we even get *breakfast* first?" Wakka complained, before being elbowed in the gut. "Agh!"  
"Yeah. We eat on the way. Quit whining, you -"  
"--'you big meanie.' Yeah yeah, I got it by now." Wakka interjected, finishing Rikku's habitual accusation with a chuckle.  
"Well, good." Rikku 'hrmph'ed, then turned back and continued walking.  
Once they returned to the room where their friends had been, only Lulu was there, looking impatient. "I'm not even going to ask what took so long. Come on, everyone's outside waiting."  
Lulu brought them outside into the warming sunshine, then pointed to one of the rear carriages. "Just sit in there. Sir Jecht and Tidus are both sitting with Yuna, so that leaves only you two."  
"Ooooh! Chocobo carriage! Thanks, Lulu!" Rikku beamed, then dashed forward to go to the assigned 'vehicle.' Wakka ran after her, causing Lulu to shake her head and laugh under her breath. Kids could be so silly.  
As she headed for her own carriage, shared with Kimahri, she thought about the tension between Tidus and his father. From what she'd seen earlier, Tidus and Yuna together made Jecht somewhat tense; all three of them would be crammed into a relatively small space for a full day.  
*With all three of them together, it's going to be a very....'interesting' trip, indeed. I'm just glad I'm not going to be there to witness it.*  
  
____________________________________________  
  
YAY! I'm back! ;D I've been gone for the past week on a road trip/family reunion in Texas. So, that explains the lack of updates. Sorry!  
The coolest thing happened a couple weeks ago. My late uncle had this daughter a long time ago, but her momma took her to Puerto Rico with her, and eventually gave her up for adoption. Her name's Kathleen. My mom gets a call a week or so ago, and it's this guy, saying that he's helping his wife find her family. Guess who his wife was? :D It was really awesome. But sad, because her father (my uncle) died three months before she called. He said they lived in Texas, and she'd been looking for her family her whole life. So my mom packed me, my cousin and my grandma into this rental car and drove us to Texas to go meet them. :D It was SO awesome. Kathleen's got four boys and lots of wide open space and she wants us to move out there and I really want to because California's stinky and and and.....anyway. *clears her throat* ^_^; I'm just really happy. And I'm inspired! Heehee. Expect more soon.  
  
Poll: Should the next chapter be from the POV of Tidus, Yuna, or Jecht? I'm thinking Jecht, but I wanna hear what you guys think too!  
  
More to come soon! ^_^ 


	10. Leaving Besaid

--Jecht's POV--  
  
Alright.  
Let me make something clear.  
I don't belong here. Didn't take a rocket scientist to figure that one out. And I don't want to bother being where I'm not wanted; but, I'm here for a reason.  
Hey, don't look at *me.* It wasn't my choice. They made me come. Yeah, they. They're still around, believe it or not. What's unclear, though, is *why.* They let Tidus come back for an obvious reason: Yuna. They still need Yuna, apparently. Sick bastards. They still need her, but couldn't work with her in her melancholic state, so they pawn around with life and death and arrange for Tidus to make an encore appearance.  
Don't get me wrong. I...really never wanted to drag him into all this in the first place. I knew he was happy in Zanarkand.  
But I also knew that he was the only one who could accomplish what I needed him to. Believe it or not, I'm no idiot. I'm not *that* cruel, either. What father would want to lead his son into a death trap? I never beat the kid. Not even when he was sitting there bawling like a baby and it was all I could do to stop from clouting the boy over the head just to shut him up.  
I knew he wanted to be like me, and hey, that made me real proud. But...it's like I never knew what to do for him. Didn't have the damnedest clue how to make the kid happy. He was always scared a' me. If I'd try to give him pointers at blitz, he'd just get upset. And he hated that I drank. Yeah, alright, so I was a bastard about that. I admit it. He was right, I should've stopped.  
Anyway. I knew he didn't want to be in Spira. And I figured if he made it through, if he accomplished what I needed him to do, I could send him back to Zanarkand. Turned out that that wasn't the case. Together, Tidus, Yuna and her guardians accomplished one hell of a lot more than I expected of them. They broke the cycle completely. That was something I hadn't even bothered hoping for.  
I know I didn't exactly jump for joy when I found out that my son and my summoner's daughter were a couple. Sorry. But...I guess I'm okay with it. It's just strange. Everything's just so...weird. The only memory I have of Yuna is when she was small - a happy, energetic little kid. Wakka and Lulu, too. I remember them when they were little, kind of. Everything's changed, but I still imagine them as seven- and eight-year-olds. Well, okay. So Lulu was...ten, maybe?  
I'm glad that *someone,* at least, can make my kid happy. Yuna sure as hell does. I didn't mean to be skeptical about their relationship. But it's...kind of hard, when you haven't seen your son for ten years or so. I know it's stupid, but I had to know that he really cared about her. Aw, hell - a blind could tell he was just following at her heels waiting to obey her every order. Almost kind of funny. But kinda sweet, too, in its own strange way. Yuna's the spitting image of...  
...Well, let's not go into that, eh? One thing I'll tell you - if you spend ten years in thought, you learn straight-off which memories are allowed and which ones aren't. Not that they're unwelcome...just too bitterly missed, maybe. It makes me happy to know that Tidus has a second chance with Yuna - the girl looks just about to *pop* with happiness whenever he's in the room. Reminds me of Amia...  
...Damn. Trying not to remember her.  
If there's one thing that pisses me off, though, it's that those idiots have to go and manipulate my son to get to the person closest to him. Something got screwed up after Yu Yevon was defeated - something went wrong, and I know it. Reason one: they're alive. They're not supposed to be alive. Or maybe they are - I never stopped to ask. Not like I could. But anyway, I doubt they're supposed to exist.  
But I sure as hell know that we exist only because they do.  
And they exist because...  
Well, I'm sure they'll let us know soon. I'm not even going to *try* for a guess.  
  
Yuna mentioned before she stuffed us into our carriages that there would be a tournament in Luca. I'd overlooked that little fact for awhile, but it returned to me once we'd started on our journey and were waiting for the next ferry at the Besaid port. Tournament, huh? What a way to come back in with a bang.  
Maybe I could get my kid to play too. From what I'd picked up from the others' conversations, he'd become one of Spira's most prized players. Now *that* gave me a laugh at first -- when I left, he was a skinny crybaby who couldn't kick a ball straight if his life depended on it. Now, he's all grown up, and he can actually blitz - or so I'm told. He looks strong, too, but still too thin. At least he's not scrawny like he used to be. But then again, everyone in Spira seems kind of scrawny. Sin's doing, of course. Mine.  
And Ruka's before me, and Denadel's before her.  
Yes, those were the last Sins. 'The precious guardians,' they were called by the Farplane populace. I remember - we met briefly, Ruka and I. I'd been angry, confused, maybe even a little scared. So I said to her,  
"I'm going to be the last Sin, y'know."  
And she looked at me and just...grinned.  
"I said that, too. I was wrong - let's hope you're right, eh?"  
  
I guess she meant it as much as I did. I guess we all meant it.  
But it's really all up to chance in the end...  
Or one hell of a son. That'll do you well, too.  
Heh...damn. Braska'd be surprised. The 'eternally miffed' Jecht, gone soft with gratitude.  
Eh...it sickens me a bit, too. But the boy deserves it.  
Bah. I'm just full of angst today, huh? Can't even keep focused on a single subject. Back to blitzball - maybe I could get the Aurochs to let me and Tidus go in for a half; maybe a full game if they don't mind. The Aurochs are doing much better, so I hear. Tidus helped bring home their first Crystal Cup in...how many years? Twenty-eight? No...twenty-nine. Almost thirty by now.  
'Man, that kid has racked up some *serious* brownie points.'  
That's what Anta would have said. Anta: Zanarkandian blitzball legend. Taught me the game and became my best friend. 'Course, he retired before my name was anything special, so I never actually played alongside him in the pro matches. Heh, he was kinda like a dad to me. If he'd said that, I would have laughed and said he was right.  
And he *was* right. The kid was set for life - he'd beaten Sin completely, become a blitz legend all on his own, and very clearly had the eye of the most eligible bachelorette around. Just in time, too - I'd spared Yuna the knowledge that the line of suitors had by no means ended. There were a few waiting just around the corner, in Besaid Village - while I was wandering over towards her house, I'd overheard a villager grumbling about all the suitors camping out there now that the Lady Maestress' residence was closeby.  
Oh well, Yuna'd find out soon enough.  
Man...I only wish I had an empty sphere to record Tidus' reaction. *That* would be some grade-A humor. 'Course, he'd probably try to kill me for taping it, but it'd still be funny.  
"Sir Jecht?" Yuna asked suddently , wiggling around in her seat to look back at me. She and Tidus had taken the front row of the carriage, and I'd stretched out as best I could in back. The thing was cramped; it was a small carriage, not suited for more than a short trek, but that didn't mean it couldn't be fancy. This one cart alone must've cost eighty thousand Gil. Something told me it hadn't been Yuna's decision to buy these; she seemed much more...conservative, I guess.  
"Eh?"  
"Would you -- ...do you mind if I introduce you and Tidus at the tournament's opening?"  
Knew it. She'd want to make a big whoop-dee-doo out of it, announcing the wondrous miracle of our return.  
"Whatever's good. Hey, Yuna. You think they'd let us play?"  
"You two? In the tournament?" She grinned at me, and then at Tidus, and then back at me. "That would be wonderful! I'm sure they'll let you! Tidus...would you want to?"  
He looked a little surprised at what I was suggesting. "Uh...okay."  
I snorted. "It'll give me the chance to show you that you'll still never get as good as your old man."  
"We'd be playing on the same team." Tidus replied simply, with this *infuriating* calmness to his voice.  
"Yeah, so?"  
"Teammates don't compete."  
"Nothin' wrong with a little test of skill. Who says?"  
  
"Me."  
"Oh, and who're you? Don't forget who I am, kid."  
At that, Tidus finally started to look pissed. Finally! For god's sake, the kid didn't have a bit of temper to him at all. Absolutely annoying!  
"Coach of the Aurochs." Tidus flashed a patented Crest smile my way.  
"Wha? Coaches don't play," I grumbled.  
"Maybe not in Zanarkand. But here, they do."  
"Listen, boy --"  
"Um...Sir Jecht...please, calm down." Yuna stammered, trying and - after a moment - succeeding at an air of confidence. "Tidus is right, it's the rules. Fighting or competition among teammates can result in immediate disqualification..."  
"...Puh. Fine, fine. Who're the Aurochs playing?"  
"Well, we don't know...the teams draw once they get there. Prelims are already over, though, so it's just between the Aurochs, the Psyches, and the Goers." Yuna replied. Tidus had turned back around, choosing to ignore me. Ugh...that kid had some nerve. The *least* he could do was at least get mad back at me.  
"Dad." My son said a little too evenly, and then I knew that he'd just been holding his tongue the entire time. Hah - he *did* have a temper!  
  
" Yeah, whaddya want?"  
He turned his head back towards me, chuckling dryly - not really looking at me, just addressing me.  
"It's...good to have you here."  
...  
Bah, to hell with it.  
What kind of comeback could I possibly make to *that?*  
"...You know, boy, you're useless for picking on these days." I muttered darkly.  
He laughed a little at that. "That's good."  
"Yeah, yeah. Nice to see you too."  
I'd said it gruffly, but I'd really meant it. And I think maybe he knew that.  
There was this long, uneasy silence that followed; it was unbroken until Yuna said quietly, "We're almost there."  
'There,' of course, would be the Besaid port. A short trip, indeed - I didn't even see what the carriages were for now.  
"Hey, so how're we gonna get all these carts into one boat?"  
"We're not," Yuna blushed. "It wasn't my idea. Rikku's and Lulu's, I think. We're staying a day or so in Luca, and then we're heading out towards Guadosalam for a conference and a peace talk or two. We don't need the carriages until we leave Luca, so...tomorrow Cid's taking them by airship to Mi'ihen Highroad so we can use them there."  
"All that, just so you don't have a bumpy ride? Gyeesh. They're doing a nice job of spoiling the Lady Maestress, eh?"  
Yuna looked down at her hands. "I'd be just as happy going on foot, but by carriage it's faster, and everyone's eager to get things settled quickly, so I just --"  
"You just said 'To hell with it,' and agreed to their demands. Right?"  
"Well...I...I guess -"  
"Yuna, you're the one in power; you gotta put your foot down. Even over something that small. You've got plenty of time, don't you? A little chat over coffee and bread can wait a day or so if you'd rather go on foot."  
"Yes, I suppose...but...it *is* more efficient by Chocobo carriage, so that's why I agreed. Once everything gets settled, I'll have plenty of time for leisure," Yuna reasoned. "And anyway, it's pointless to squabble about something so insignificant."  
I huffed, surprised. After all this, shouldn't she have known better?  
"Yuna, when do you expect things to settle down? They never completely do. You should know that."  
"Well...it'll get easier soon! Once the peace is issued and all the representatives are well-set in their jobs. That's got to be the first thing taken care of. Then I can think about wasting time traveling at my own leisure,"  
I couldn't help it - I shook my head, chuckling. At that rate, she'd work herself to death before she even got a glimpse of peace and relaxation.  
"What?" she demanded, a playfully irked confusion on her face. "What'd I say *now?*"  
"Absolutely nothing, *dear.*" Tidus grinned at her and they shared a just-between-us look, just for a split second, that was so sickeningly sweet and repulsive I wanted to gag.  
And to think I'd been that way once, with Amia.  
Gyeesh.  
Thankfully it didn't last very long, but Yuna still had a little grin as she turned her head back towards me. "Really, what'd I say?"  
"Nothin'. Forget about it."  
"Are you sure?"  
I nodded, and she turned back the way she was seated. "If there's anything I'm doing wrong, please tell me..."  
Now *that* made me laugh. "You expect me to know? Yuna, I can make a full sphere pool of pro blitzers kiss my ass and beg for mercy. But for god's sake...how would I know how to run the world?"  
"I'm sorry..." she amended, being painfully polite. I found most polite people incredibly annoying. Yuna wasn't that bad - she wasn't so meticulously raised that she couldn't make light of a situation, or be casual at times. But Christ, some of her apologetic outbursts drove me nuts. She was like a female, teenage Auron.  
Well, at least she wasn't half so quixotic.  
Heh...  
Auron. It'd be nice to talk to him again. It's been awhile since we last spoke.  
Well, no...we spoke in my last moments as an untouched Sin. I'd accused him of being late. Sarcasm, cynicism, gruffness - I hadn't expected that he would be able to do it at all, much less alone. Naw, I didn't *doubt* Auron, really. It all just seemed so goddamned impossible.  
But hey - when you're Sin, anything's possible. Right?  
Yeah, yeah, that's not funny. I know.  
Yuna continued, "...to hear many different opinions. A different perspective...you know? So I don't miss anything..."  
"Mmmhm." I nodded, hardly soaking in a word. Auron would be gone now. When I'd seen him...he'd been at peace. He wouldn't have even stayed on the Farplane too long. That's the thing - if a soul is truly, completely at peace; if they reach total ease of spirit; *then* they're granted eternal rest. That is the only death a pyrefly suffers. But the Farplane's so crowded with all those damn whiners that hardly anyone ever gets that far. Only a few, out of millions. Billions. But Auron's life was complete, I was sure of that. He would have no reason to linger.  
But Braska...no, Braska wouldn't have passed. Just like Amia didn't pass, waiting for both me and Tidus. Braska's waiting for his daughter. Oh, yeah, his wife's long since reunited with him, but his link with Yuna's too damn strong to let him go.  
Heh. He'll be waiting awhile longer, but I don't think he minds that much. Pyreflies can't see their outside world directly unless they're *there,* like normal people, so Braska can't watch her, but Tidus told him all about her and plenty more, I'm sure. He'll wait for her.  
"...you think?" Yuna's voice came floating back to me, snapping me back awake from my memories.  
"Eh?"  
Yuna smiled. "I said it's wonderful weather today, don't you think?"  
"Eh? Oh, yeah. Great. Going to be nice and scorching."  
"Well aren't you just bubbling with good nature today," Tidus remarked dryly. "It's not gonna get too hot. It's good blitz weather. We're here - come on," He easily opened his door and hopped out, so I followed suit. Yuna started to, but Tidus beat her to the punch - he was already there, opening her door, helping her out with a bright grin. Yuna laughed, and my stomach rolled. I'd have to make a point of it to tell Lulu to stick someone *else* in a carriage with those two. I couldn't take it.  
They were immediately off in their own little world, apparently racing towards the dock. Out of the corner of my eye, I glimpsed Lulu walking up beside me.  
"Did you enjoy yourself, Sir Jecht?" Her voice held a tinge of humor.  
"Is that sarcasm?"  
"It can be sickening, can't it." Definitely humor. But there was happiness there too.  
"Enough sap to drown a shoopuf." I scowled. "You stuck me with those two deliberately, didn't you?"  
"Of course." Lulu looked at me. "Everyone here wants you to be at ease with Tidus. And I wanted you to see how happy he and Yuna are."  
Yeah...I saw it. Hated to admit it, but I saw it. "They're a good match. I guess."  
"You'll get used to it," Lulu chuckled. "It's much better than when he wasn't here. All Yuna did with her spare time was mope."  
"I'm not unfamiliar with the concept."  
"Hm..? Oh...your wife?"  
"Yeah."  
"I'm sorry, Sir Jecht..."  
"It was a long time ago." I said simply, and roughly enough not to invite further discussion. "Let's go."  
  
__________________________________________  
  
A/N: Yeep! Sorry for the OOC-Jechtness of this chapter.. I've yet to use Jecht for my own devious ends D But right now, he's more of an informative piece of the puzzle. There's a big huge 'Space for Rent' in the fabric of this story, and Jecht has a good idea about what's there when everyone else doesn't have a clue. Of course, it won't stay that way for long. Not that many chapters will be in his POV - If you haven't noticed I've limited the POV-ness solely to either Tidus, Yuna, or 3rd person. But I don't like doing third person POVs for some reason. x_X Not enough insight into the characters I guess. I use first person to let the readers get a direct look into a character - his/her motives, emotions, et cetera. And THAT is why I'll NEVER be a mystery writer XD I give WAY too much away.  
Sorry about the lack of updates, I've been reallllllllly BUSY. As in BUSYBUSYBUSY kinda busy. =3 We've only got a week 'till Finals at El Modena High for my swim team, and I've been going to meets and invitationals 'till my head spins. We had the Savanna Invitational on Saturday - I dropped 6 seconds off my best time for 100 free! Yay!!! 6 seconds, for those of you who aren't acquainted with the world of swim, is a massive dent. o_o I'm really happy. So was my mom - she bought me FFIX. XD Great game. I've rented/beaten it before. I recommend it. The next few chapters will actually have - *gasp!* - plot development! Whoa! Yeah, really! I mean it! =P  
  
Tidus/Yuna-ers, don't fret - I'll be back on track shortly after they leave Luca. D  
  
More to come soon. Feel free to contact me: MSN/Email - blarghness@hotmail.com.  
  
One more thing! I know I don't say it much, but thank you guys so much for all your reviews. =3 They mean SO much to me. If there's anything that needs to be fixed, or if you have a suggestion, or even if you just want to yell at me or something, DEFINITELY put it in a review. I'll take it into mind!  
  
Hey! One FINAL thing! The humble author ( that's me o_o I think. ) is considering a new title for DCT. Have any suggestions? Either email or review with the possible title, and I'll consider it. If I pick yours, I'll give you tons of credit =3 Or maybe I won't change it and just see what other people think the story should be called...I can't dub it the title I want to dub it, because it's a spoiler in itself. Wah. x_X Thank you! 


	11. Reminisce

Tidus closed his eyes against the warmth of the noonday sun and let the salty breeze ruffle his hair. He lay stretched out on the uppermost deck of the S.S. Winno; Rikku, Wakka, and Yuna all lay near him. Such relaxation was rare to him even in Zanarkand...and this moment in time, this snapshot memory, would have to be filed away in his mind's eye and especially cherished. Rikku was perhaps an arm's length away, idly pointing at some cloud-shape to show to Wakka, who lay close beside her. And Yuna he could reach with just a movement of the hand - she did not touch him, but she was close enough to touch without effort. That was enough. She looked as if she were napping, though she wasn't asleep; she didn't watch the sky like her companions but instead let her face turn towards Tidus', her eyes shut, dark blonde hair falling over her face. Tidus wanted to touch her then, but knew it were better if he didn't disturb her, in case she was indeed sleeping. Besides -- he *always* wanted to touch her. And it wasn't fair to her that she might lose sleep for his own strange need to constantly have his hands on her.  
Jecht was below deck, sleeping. That much he knew. It had always been a habit of Jecht's to assume unconsciousness for somewhere around twelve hours preceding a game. Lulu was likely at the rear of the ship, as she always tended to be, watching the sea. Kimahri was undoubtedly somewhere else on the main outer deck -- he hated confined spaces, buildings included. Understandable, for a Ronso.  
The sun made all four of them sleepy, sluggish. At first, they'd made a game out of pointing out shapes in the clouds and bickering playfully over what they looked like, but that had simmered down to the occasional revelation that this cloud looked like a Mafdet, or that cloud looked like an upside-down legless, wingless Chocobo. Most of their time was now spent in contented silence. It would still be awhile before they reached Luca, and they didn't see any sense in wasting these perfectly good moments doing something productive. There was time aplenty now for laziness, and they deserved this time very much.  
"'Ey." Wakka gestured idly to the sky to the right of him. "Looks like Seymour's hair, ya?"  
Tidus glanced sleepily up at whatever Wakka was pointing at, then shook his head. "I don't know."  
"It looks more like one of Rikku's eight-legged machina," Yuna murmured, a drowsy grin curling her lips upward. She didn't open her eyes.  
"Hey, how do you know? You're half-asleep."  
"I saw it earlier. Thought it looked like Seymour's hair at first too, but then I changed my mind."  
"Mmn."  
And that was the extent of the conversation. Rikku dozed off, Wakka returned to staring off at the clouds, and Yuna returned to her half-nap. Tidus was again left to his thoughts but found it not worth the effort to keep up a solid train of consciousness, and so stretched out on his side and closed his eyes.  
  
Jecht awoke slowly, from an uneasy and unrestful sleep. He also woke up chilly.  
As his mind shook off its sleepiness, he realized that there was no reason he should be cold - the weather had hinted that the day would be sweltering when he'd retired to the lower deck for rest.  
He became aware of the slightest feeling; something that made his eyes snap open immediately. The smallest, just barely tangible feeling, on the hairs at the back of his neck...a single finger stroking them, a feeling so familiar he hadn't taken much notice of it at first.  
Jecht remembered.  
In his old life, in Zanarkand...  
Centuries, eons, lifetimes ago...  
Amia.  
  
----------------------  
  
Amia laughed, pretending to be scandalized. "Jecht, you *didn't!*"  
"I did. Damn...I swear, Mia, you haven't met a true bastard 'til you've met a blitzball sponsor. They're stupid; they think they own you just 'cause they pay for your team's uniforms or whatever."  
Her laugh had become a chuckle, and she grinned at me playfully as her arm slipped over my waist. "Yes, I guess sponsors are difficult...but what's the rule with blitzball coaches, hmm? I'm *married* to one of *those.*"  
"Oh, *thanks.*" I replied dryly, grinning myself. It was a good morning -- I was usually too tired from blitz practice to wake up early. But I'd made the practice yesterday ridiculously easy and short; in part because I had to have a little 'talk' with one of the Abes' sponsors about how dictatorial they were trying to be, and in part because Mia had been making me feel kinda guilty about being so wrapped up in blitz. So I surprised her with an early arrival home, ordered some dinner delivered and some movies on sphere and after that was all finished, took her to bed. All that put her in an incredibly good mood. And when she was happy like this, I swear to god -- all was right with the world.  
"Well," I began, moving over her and biting her bare shoulder lightly. "Blitzball coaches are bastards by nature too, you know." At that I tickled her mercilessly, not stopping when she begged and squirmed for it, and laughing when she tried to pry my strong hands away with her own delicate ones. Finally I did stop; she tried to give me a disapproving glare, but she was still laughing too much to accomplish it. "Ruthless sons- a'-bitches, don't you think?" I grinned at her.  
"Indeed," Mia agreed, eyes twinkling with humor. She linked her fingers at the back of my neck. "Hard to persuade,"  
I laughed. "Only when -- hey...that feels pretty good..."  
"What, this?" She stroked the hair at the back of my neck curiously, and again, it was hypnotizing.  
"Yeah. Makes me wanna curl up n' go to sleep, heh..."  
"You'd better not...!" Amia laughed, pulling me down to her. "I'm not finished with you yet."  
  
----------------------  
  
Jecht was silent for a long moment, unmoving. He pondered over what had happened to cause this obvious pattern...and what the hell they thought they were doing with the dead.  
She wouldn't know. He had been listless when he first returned - so would she.  
It had been countless years since he'd been able to touch her. And now that he could, he was afraid to. Afraid as well that he might turn around and find it nothing but a figment of his brooding imagination. That had happened before: he would think that he felt her brush against him or move close to him in his sleep, and wake, finding no one. It happened so often that he almost wished to cease dreaming of her altogether. It made him lonely.  
"Hey..." he muttered softly; it was a sort of morning ritual, and at his greeting she always...  
...Planted an ever-light kiss on his skin, in this case the back of his neck, soft as silk and...  
Cold as ice.  
It made Jecht's hair stand up on end, as much from the unexpected chill of it as from apprehension.  
As if he could move no faster, Jecht slowly turned over to face her.  
It had been Amia, he'd known it instantly. But...  
Even when he turned to her, she lay still, as if she had not seen him. She was dressed as she always dressed before he left; conservatively, compared to the styles of Zanarkand at that time, but horrifyingly revealing to the Spira sense of dress. Dark denim capris; she'd never stop wearing those, no matter if it were snowing to beat Gagazet outside; and a beige tank top, suited for the summer or fall months. Yes -- remembering, Jecht realized that it must have been early fall when she'd finally passed, and he remembered watching her, remembered that she had been wearing that same outfit. He'd watched her incessantly after he left, unable to do anything but watch her wither like he watched some sphere movie. Jecht had watched her die, as well. That was the only time he could ever remember crying.  
Yu Yevon had laughed.  
Jecht had hated him more than anything. Than everything else he hated combined. Still did.  
Amia lay still, blue eyes half-mast, as if relaxing. She didn't seem to notice her counterpart, thought Jecht knew why. He gently passed a hand over her arm, watching her eyes open all the way. Where his hand had passed, her arm flickered in the pinkish-translucent glow of a pyrefly. It happened that way when one passed between 'life and death,' so to speak.  
She looked up at him then, eyes as innocent as a child's, though her expression was blank. It didn't worry Jecht - in fact, it was reassuring. Amia was often expressionless in situations where she didn't know what to do.  
It was a long time before Amia moved, and when she did, it was to rest her palm lightly against Jecht's cheek.  
"Hey," she answered quietly, the Mia-smile Jecht knew so well growing on her lips.  
Jecht silently sat up and pulled her with him, embracing her tightly.  
"You've never hugged me *this* tight," Amia mused, burying her head in her husband's shoulder.  
"Yeah, well...y'know what they say."  
"Oh? What do they say?"  
"You know..."  
Amia grinned. "No I don't,"  
"You're gonna make me say it, aren't you...?" Jecht muttered hesitantly.  
"Oh, yes."  
"You know, that thing...'bout not knowing til you lose somethin'."  
Amia laughed, a sound sorely missed by Jecht. Her laugh had always been quiet, content, not too loud and not too soft. "You mean, 'You don't know how much something means to you until you lose it?'"  
"Uh, somethin' like that." Jecht mumbled. Love poems and sweet words had never been his thing; his affection was blunt, straightforward. Amia had been one of those rare women who didn't see any difference between 'Love ya.' and 'Oh, how I love thee; let me count the ways...' as long as the words were from the heart. That was part of the reason he married her.  
"Why Jecht, I think that's the sweetest thing you never had the stomach to say to me," his wife teased. He chuckled briefly.  
"Hey, can't blame me for trying."  
"Good point."  
"Love you."  
"Jecht..."  
"Hn..?"  
"Did I die...?"  
Jecht paused, wincing inwardly. He'd hoped he wouldn't have to face that question. "What makes you ask that, Mi?"  
"Well this doesn't exactly look like heaven, but it's certainly not where I went to sleep...I remember being so tired."  
He moved a lock of flaxen hair back behind her ears. "It doesn't matter, Mia."  
"I did, didn't I? And since you're here, that means you did, too...what happened, Jecht?"  
"Mi..."  
Amia crawled into Jecht's lap like some sleepy child, bringing a slightly exaggerated grunt of breathlessness from her husband. "Love you too, by the way..."  
"That's good," Jecht grinned in a lopsided manner, surprising himself at just how much he liked hearing that.  
"Tell me what happened?" Amia asked simply.  
"I already told you once. You'll remember in a little while...and we're not dead, either. We're on a ship, heading for a blitzball game in Luca...Mi, this place's called Spira."  
"Spira? Sounds familiar...but I don't remember you telling me anything like this."  
"You will, soon."  
"Tell me again, then?"  
"But..."  
"Jecht, if we're dead, then we've got all the time in the world. And if we're not, then we've got the rest of our lives together, be they five hours or fifty years. Jecht...whether you told me before or not, I still need an explanation for...what happened. Why you left. And it'd better be damn good."  
Jecht sighed slowly, and after a moment, bent to lightly kiss his wife. She smiled.  
"Okay. And there *is* a damn good reason, too, trust me."  
"Go on," Amia urged, making herself more comfortable in his embrace.  
"Well...remember how the day I went out with the team, the seas were perfect..."  
  
An hour or two later Jecht found himself heading for the uppermost deck, trailing Amia close behind him. Wakka lifted his head slightly upon hearing the elder man's arrival, but Jecht put a finger to his lips, urging him not to make a sound. Wakka nodded and dropped his head back down, closing his eyes again.  
Jecht turned and took Amia's hand, leading her up onto the upper deck. Sliding an arm around her waist, he used his free hand to point to the flaxen-haired young man that lay silently on the deck's floor.  
Amia froze. She glanced at Jecht, eyes alone revealing her shock.  
--Tidus?-- she mouthed silently. Jecht nodded, once, and she turned back to gaze in wonder at her son. He lay on his side, his back turned to his parents, presumably napping like his companions. Amia noted the young woman closest to him; she lay too close to be anyone else. She pointed and mutely queried Jecht again:  
--...Yuna?--  
He nodded again, halfway grinning. Amia started to approach him, but Jecht stopped her with a gentle hand. She sent a confused look his way, and in response Jecht silently shook his head and led her back down the stairwell.  
Once they'd reached the main deck again, Jecht leaned against the railing on the ship's hull and shook his head. "Don't bother them. We've got plenty of time, Mi."  
"But I haven't seen him in..." His wife began.  
"Mia. Let the kid be for now. When he wakes up, he'll find you soon enough. He just got back too, you know? All the boy cares about is Yuna. Yuna this, Yuna that, 'til it makes me wanna hurl. Don't bother them. He's just getting used to being with her, let alone with me. I'm trying to stay out of their way as much as I can for now. Y'see? Let him adjust."  
"Jecht, I'm his *mother,* for heaven's sake!" Amia protested.  
"Yeah...you're my mother."  
Amia, startled, looked up to the source of the voice. Tidus looked down on them both from the upper deck, a strange sense of calmness on his face. Jecht realized it as the firm restraint of any emotion - he'd seen it on Tidus' face in his last moments in Sin. Studying the face more closely...yes, there was emotion there. Just hidden. Sadness - that's what it was.  
"Tidus..." Amia murmured, rapt with the sight of him. Slowly, she smiled.  
Tidus shook his head slowly, his voice holding the hint of a plea for understanding. "You're my mother. But...you died. A long time ago. So did Dad."  
Jecht nodded slightly in comprehension, turning wordlessly towards the ocean and ignoring his wife's own crestfallen silence. She didn't understand now, but she would. Tidus didn't say that to hurt her - the kid had never had much capacity for cruelty. It was just a fact - he and Amia weren't part of his life anymore. It wasn't that they weren't welcome in it, simply that they...didn't belong there like they once had.  
They weren't *supposed* to be a part of it. Neither of them were even supposed to be here.  
Neither was Tidus, of course -- but they were all here, whether they were supposed to be or not. And Tidus' purposes for living did not include his immediate family. Maybe they would, in time; but now, though Jecht knew Tidus wouldn't say it aloud, they were intrusions. Liabilities. All he'd asked for was Yuna.  
Jecht mused to himself that if this situation had come up in Zanarkand, he would have taken a swig of beer and told Tidus to go to his room and stay there. Tidus would have given him that look again, that seven- year-old's glare of betrayal, and stormed off. Typical, everyday, ho-hum life at home.  
"Hey, boy."  
"Yeah?"  
Jecht gestured towards the front of the ship slightly, body still turned towards the sea. "We'll be in Luca 'n less than half an hour. You ready?"  
"Yeah."  
He nodded once. "Alright. Good."  
Amia's eyes had been glued on Tidus the entire time, and she watched her son turn and head back towards the center of the upper deck. Yuna had awoken as well, and she came up to him; Amia couldn't tell what it was that Yuna asked, but he only responded with a weak shrug. She watched Yuna wrap her arms around the boy, rest her chin on his shoulder; watched as Tidus seemed to go limp in her arms even as his came around her, and could not help but note that he hadn't lost all of the child in him yet. He'd always relaxed like that in any kind of embrace; it had been one of the adorable things about him. It made Amia faintly jealous. Only she and, a few times, Jecht, had ever held him and had him react so.  
"He hasn't changed that much," Amia murmured.  
Jecht laughed once, gruffly. "'Least he doesn't cry anymore."  
"Jecht..."  
Her husband chuckled lowly to himself, shaking his head. "I'm kidding. Just give 'im time, Mi. He'll come around."  
A lightly-dressed blonde girl, different this time, made her presence felt where Tidus had stood a moment before. The young woman, perhaps sixteen, stared down at Amia with wide green eyes. "Whoa...Wakka, get over here!" The girl chirped, breaking into a broad grin.  
After a moment, the redhead Amia presumed to be Wakka came up next to his companion. Blinking sleepily, he seemed almost incomprehending as he too stared openly at this new turn of events. Idly, the young blonde girl jabbed her elbow into his ribs. "It's not nice to stare, Wakka."  
She hadn't stopped staring herself.  
Yuna reappeared next to Wakka then, looking mildly surprised. A light sea breeze had begun to blow, and so Yuna had to raise her voice slightly as she smiled, calling down,  
"Hello..."  
Amia smiled without meaning to. Yuna's tone was geniunely friendly, and Amia was unused to such immediate acceptance. Zanarkand's people had never liked her much, save Jecht.  
"Hello."  
"My name's Yuna. This is Wakka, and that's Rikku. It's...it's an honor to have you with us, Mrs. ..."  
"Amia." Amia's cerulean eyes met Yuna's mixed green-and-blue ones, and Yuna found herself surprised at how intensely the older woman's gaze fixed on her. It reminded her of meeting the priest when she'd first gone to the Zanarkand dome; both she and the priest had possessed a sort of desperate calmness, if that made any sense. Composed, but at the same time, demanding. "My name is Amia."  
"Well, then...welcome aboard, Amia," Yuna smiled. "We're very glad to have you."  
  
_____________________________  
  
A/N: This chapter is verra much dedicated to Fire Rules, whom without I would no longer be posting under FF.net at all o_o; Or at least not for a loooong time. The reason it took so long to get this chapter out was my computer -- Internet Explorer decided it hated FF.net, and wouldn't let me log on. I could get into anything else just fine - Hotmail, message boards, the works. But FF.net? Nooooooo! MEAN IE! So I'm using Netscape, under Fire Rules' suggestion. =P Hail to the computer nerds! Thanks a bazillion, Timmeh!  
Wow, I haven't done a third-person POV for awhile. I couldn't decide on whose POV to put it in, and I wanted to examine the Jecht-Amia thing more thoroughly (Jecht's pet name for her, Mia, is pronounced 'Mee-ah,' by the way - just a shortening of her name, not 'my-a'; Mi, as well, is just another abbreviation - it's pronounced 'Mee' ) so I just said, 'Aw, to hell with it' and did a 3rd. What'dja think? BTW, the little memory sequence in this chapter took place before Tidus was born. I figured it'd best portray Jecht and Amia's relationship if they weren't pestered by a squallin' little Tidie-Widie. =P  
As for Tidus' reaction to Amia's appearance, I absolutely *could not* see Tidus jumping into her arms and cuddling her half to death. Remember, in FFX, when Tidus was telling Yuna about his parents' relationship? And he was reminiscing on how his mom just adored his dad and gave all her attention to him, which is why he hated his father. I quote:  
Tidus: "But then..."  
(Memory) Li'l Tidus: 'Mommy!'  
Amia: 'Just a minute, dear.' (totally not paying attention, doting on Jecht)  
Jecht: 'Ah, go to him. He'll cry if you don't.' (Hey! Listen close - there's fondness in that voice, meant towards Tidus. :D )  
Note how it's implied that while reflecting on that memory, Tidus realizes that his father is the only one of his parents showing any concern for him at that moment. Sure, he loved his mom plenty, but by now he realizes that it wasn't his father's fault that Amia never paid attention to him as a child. And after them being 'dead' for so many years, he's bound to have some rough spots with them both. I think this is just the best way to illustrate the relationship between the three. And yes, I do fully believe that even the 'eternally miffed' Jecht can be undone by the powers of love. Hehe. I'm silly.  
  
I think I told you guys already, but if I haven't, DCT's likely going to be a 30 - 35 chapter endeavor. =3 Yummy!  
  
Ooo...100th review's getting close. n_n In the way of Fire Rules, I shall offer a.....cyber cookie! Mwaha! El cookie goes to the 100th reviewer. =3  
  
Expect more soon. 


	12. Unwanted Surprises

Mom, Dad and I stood behind Yuna's original guardians, who stood well behind Yuna, who stood at the podium, speaking to a standing-room-only blitzball stadium. She hadn't wanted any chance of us being seen - yet. Her speech would reveal many surprises, us included. Mom and Dad were silent for the most part, my old man out of patience. Mom was in a kind of clueless wonderment, wanting to look at everything. She'd never been to Spira, after all. She and Rikku were fast friends; but then again, there were few people Rikku didn't befriend. The Al Bhed were the closest things to Zanarkand's people that Mom had, I guess. Technology-wise, I mean.

I know I hurt Mom earlier. I didn't mean to, but...

I don't know. I should've been really happy. But it was more disturbing than anything. First Dad, then my mother...it made me wonder what other ghosts from the past would be dug up, polished off, and thrust at me to deal with.

"...things are happening quickly; I assure you that peace between the nations of Spira is very secure, and to my Al Bhed cousins I wish the greatest luck in their endeavor to rebuild their Home. Yes...I know some of you know, but some of you don't; I am...half Al Bhed."

That caused many murmurs in the crowd and some outright exclamations, but it wasn't as severe as Yuna had expected. She went on: "I hope, for those of you who've never had much love for them, that you will now understand that they are highly misunderstood, misinterpreted...I urge you to secure terms of peace with them on your own. This...that isn't the only surprise, though...many miracles have come about in the past week."

Our cue. Rikku beamed at me and moved out of the way, as did Lulu. Jecht went first, Amia following a pace or so behind. I would be the final surprise, so I stayed relatively out of view.

If there had been a murmur at Yuna's revelation, there was a *roar* at Jecht's appearance. Whole masses of people surged to their feet, some already screaming in their obsessed fandom, some merely rubbing their eyes. Yuna kept talking, a little bit of laughter in her voice.

"We don't know why yet, but...it seems our esteemed Sir Jecht has returned to us. Following shortly was his wife, Amia, whom he'd been forced to part with before his pilgrimage..."

The roar grew louder, and I could hear my old man laughing. He'd always loved adoring crowds, after all. His arm was around Mom happily, and I couldn't help but think, *How typical.* They were off in their own little world, like always.

"Well...one more thing!"

The crowd died down a bit, but only enough to be able to halfway-hear what she was saying.

Yuna turned around with the brightest of smiles on her face, motioning that I should come stand beside her at the podium. I obeyed, and when she wrapped her arms around one of mine and uttered a single word, my name, into the microphone, the crowd's response was deafening. 

Women cried. Their husbands applauded. Children cheered. It was nothing new to me, but somehow, it was...different. It wasn't the same kind of mindless adoration that a normal blitzer would get.

Yuna was speaking into the microphone: "...two generations of heroes have been given to the people..." Even up here, I could barely hear her.

Heroes?

Was that what we were?

Well...that would make sense. But I sure didn't *feel* like a hero. Just a lucky guy who got a second chance. I didn't want to be a hero. Didn't even wanna feel like one. That was supposed to be over and done with, right? Hero-dom...hah. Sports star, yeah - I could live with that. But I couldn't live with the entire world looking up to me and kissing my toes. Sports freaks were enough.

Yuna turned her face towards me and sent me a grin, mouthing a silent 'I love you.'

I smiled. Yuna...I didn't want her to adore me like my mother adored Dad. I didn't want her to think of me as flawless, because I wasn't. Yuna knew me inside and out and still loved me, and that was just fine. Adoration was as mindless as the next teenybopper blitzball fan, and just as useless, too.

"I'd also like to..." Yuna began, and that gradually quieted the masses down to an excited murmur. She cast a sideways beam at me, and I couldn't help but chuckle at how excited she was over this.

"I'd like to announce our engagement," Yuna announced, her tone and her smile telling me she was so happy she could have been dancing. "and that the marriage will take place very soon, within the month."

Yuna and I had spent only a few moments choosing the time and place; aside from the playful suggestion of 'Today!' from me, we'd both had similar ideas. Besaid, of course, would be the place; it was her hometown after all, and I wouldn't ask her to hold it anywhere she didn't want to. It really didn't matter to me where it happened, because after all, a wedding's a wedding, and whether we held it on Besaid Island or in a sewer didn't change the fact that we would be married. So, that one was up to her. The time, though, was something that took a bit more tinkering. She'd wanted a good month and a half or even two to prepare, and I was thinking something more along the lines of 'as soon as possible.' But we'd compromised. We'd agreed that we'd start the planning within this week, and if all went well, we would be able to hold it well before the end of the month.

Anyway...Yuna had wanted everyone to find out at once. And everyone did.

I will never, ever forget the responses that we got from our friends at that news.

Rikku's jaw dropped; she squealed and clung to Wakka, starry-eyed and babbling ecstatically. Rather hilarious, actually - Wakka's smug 'told you so' grin induced the bully in Rikku, who promptly gave his arm a charlie-horse. Wakka stopped grinning.

Lulu had been sipping a glass of red wine, which she almost choked on.

Kimahri grinned a cat-like grin. I guess that's the only way he *could* grin, but then again, I wouldn't know. I'd never seen him grin to begin with.

Amia was smiling, in that eerily, hopefully bright way of hers. She said something to Jecht, and he 'harumph'ed. Dad didn't seem too pleased, but it didn't bother me. Dad was never that happy to begin with - so hey...whatever.

The crowds loved it, though. Every reporter in the stadium - and there were many in every section - had their sphere recorders trained on us.

The side of me that knew how to act in public was telling me to be the immaculate gentleman. But I couldn't help seeing the chance for mischief. I could grab her now and give her a kiss the reporters and their sphere recorders would absolutely eat up; I almost did, actually. But this wasn't the time. Yuna had a job to do.

"Jecht and Tidus will, if the Aurochs will be so kind as to let them, play in today's game..."

Yuna had planned to say more, but the cheers and whistles of general approval gave her not even a hope of being heard. She waited, smiling, for the clamor to die down.

Once it did, she grinned and bowed slightly. "Well then, I'm sure you're all eager to see some blitzball, yes? Let the Spira Tournament Finals begin!"

The game hadn't even started and the crowd was going crazy - I could bet that many of them would lose their voice by halftime, at this rate. But that was alright.

Yuna turned back to us and grinned. "Well...was that okay?"

I kissed her temple. "Wonderful. They love you, Yuna."

She smiled, and at that point Rikku threw her arms about her cousin and gave her what seemed to be a very constricting hug. They were both laughing, though, and Rikku turned her happiness to me.

"You! Why didn't you tell me you two were getting *married?*"

"It was a surprise," I laughed.

"...So?"

Yuna grinned. "It was my decision not to tell any of you until now, so if there is any fault, it's mine. So...what do you guys think? Is it alright?"

"*ALRIGHT?!* Are you *kidding,* Yunie!? You're gonna get married and have lots of babies and it's gonna be so *great!*"

Yuna was laughing, a rich, heartfelt sound that I'd rarely heard on the pilgrimage. I'd missed the sound. "Well...I wouldn't count on babies just yet, but we *are* getting married!"

"Congratulations..." Mom smiled and embraced Yuna awkwardly, then turned to me and did the same, almost hesitantly. I hugged her back, feeling entirely out of place.

"Tidus...I'm so glad you're happy." She murmured. Funny -- she'd never been half so affectionate when I was a child. When I needed it. Okay, so she was affectionate sometimes - but it was rare.

"Thanks," I found myself saying simply, and that was it. That's all I could say. I couldn't force some half-hearted emotional blabber out of myself. She would have liked to hear something nice, something a long-lost son might say to his mother, but...nothing would come to mind.

Yuna sensed a moment of uncertainty and took my arm, smiling. "Win for me...okay?"

I couldn't help grinning back. "Yes, ma'am!"

So it turned out, we were playing some very uncertain-looking Goers. Jecht grinned at that news, and I sensed trouble coming.

"The big one, in the middle - who's he?"

"That's Bickson. He's your general bastard," I muttered, distracted with my own stretching. We were due out in a minute or so.

"Ha! I mutilated his father in the sphere pool. Even his dad was awful. The man blitzed like a shoopuf."

"That's nice, Dad."

"Tell you what, just wait until I whip out my old shot..."

I resisted the urge to roll my eyes. "Dad, you're not the only one that can pull it off, y'know."

He snorted. "I'll believe it when I see it."

Even now he didn't realize I was talking about me.

Brother walked by and knelt down beside me, grinning. "Hieta dy ky? Dni Goers cyyg cugi dnia'hi epyod dy bumm dniuh berdm..." He laughed, talking in Al Bhed, only back-translated. It was the version of his language he used around other teams, and if the situation was desperate enough to call for a sacrifice of precious air, what he spoke when he yelled across the sphere pool. Brother was our prize player; his high PA and EN ratings made him nearly unstoppable, not to mention highly coveted. Some of the bribes we'd been offered to trade Brother to another team reached into the seven- and eight-digit range. Brother could rest assured, though - he was too valuable to the team to be traded, and besides, he and I were like...well...*brothers.* "Dnum mnyoct pi urdihimdurk."

I swept out my hand and shook his, chuckling. "Hieta. Pid ayo e dnyomert Gil dni mbnihi byyc zucc pi aiccyz pa necwduli."

"Yri mnyoct ryd zemdi dniuh Gil yr aiccyz zedih, whuirt!"

With that he gave a loud guffaw. Standing up, he turned and went back towards his locker, giving a brief and respectful nod to my father.

"What the hell was that all about, eh?" Dad asked me.

"That's Brother, our center. Also the airship navigator. The guy he just passed is Wedge - he's our goalie. The Guado's name is Giera, and he's our right-forward; you'll be taking his place, so he'll likely run defense. Naida and Botta are our usual defense, though - those two are over in the corner, see?"

Botta waved appropriately. "Hey, Coach -- congratulations, ya?"

"Thanks," I grinned. Vaguely, I was aware that being 'in the spotlight' would put Jecht off -- he was so used to having center stage. It made me wonder how he felt. "Hey, Botta, are you going in for defense, or is Naida? Jecht's snagging Giera's spot for now, so Giera's gonna take over defense."

Naida and Botta exchanged a brief look, then Botta shrugged. "Let Naida go in, her AT's higher."

"Gotcha. Alright, guys - let's go!"

I was pleased to see that the Goers did not at all look enthusiastic to be playing against two legends in the same game. There was no pre-game taunting; even our opponents seemed to be in reverence of the occasion. They were playing against *Jecht.* *The* Jecht. Not to mention Tidus, too, but Jecht...whoa. And that was okay.

The Aurochs on the field - Giera, Brother, Naida, Wedge, plus Jecht and me, were all lightly resting on our posts. Lesson one, day one: Never grip your post like a liferaft. Hold it lightly at the front and plant your feet firmly either at the post's center or near its back. This allows for an efficient, rocketing sendoff. Especially important for the middle-forward.

There are a million little things to worry about in blitzball, and though it sounds boring, it's heart-pounding to actually be doing it. You're constantly worrying about whether you've forgotten something; you have to keep an eye on the position of *every* other teammate, and if you're the center, you've got to worry about being almost everywhere at once. If there's no hope of scoring a goal, you have to worry about the kind of defense you're running, and try to make sure that the opposing team doesn't score a goal, at least. God forbid you got the air knocked out of you -- that's lesson two, day one. No matter what happens, keep the air in your lungs. Even if you're getting stepped on and cut up and smashed into oblivion, you sure as hell better not let go of the oxygen you have. An airless player is a useless one; sometimes a dead one.

Brother reacted far faster than I did to the sendoff - in fact, I had gotten into the bad habit of watching *him* as a signal of the start of the game, instead of the blitzball. So when he shot up towards the ball, I immediately surged forward, slipping easily over a Doram who seemed surprised that I found her head useful as a leverage point. Jecht was fast to catch onto the strategy, and practically slammed his way through poor Balgerda.

That's one of the beautiful things about blitzball - once you're in the sphere pool, gender doesn't matter one damn bit.

It's also why not a lot of women get very far in blitz. Not to say they can't be a good sport and take some brutality in stride, but it's just that they aren't bred to take such beatings. Men are, I guess. Oh, don't get me wrong, female blitzers are often very capable of beating a male blitzer into mashed potatoes, but they simply aren't designed to take what they dish out.

Anyway, Doram was hot on my tail at once, and kept on guard as I positioned myself to the left of the goal. The ball was involved in a game of Monkey in the Middle with Brother and Naida, and Abus as the unfortunate primate. After a couple passes back and forth Brother fired it to Giera, who promptly sent it back to him. After a scuffle with Abus - a close one, too, because it seemed his EN almost ran out - Brother passed it to Jecht.

Almost a minute into the game, and the crowd had gone silent. Every sphere recorder in the stadium was trained on my father; I knew his body language and realized he was gearing up to show off. Appropriate, for Jecht, but I still had to control the urge to roll my eyes. What would it be this time -- Mark III, aka the Jecht Shot? Again?

Oh, yes, of course it was. I saw him knock out Balgerda, and the spinning, and the firing of the shot...

Even I had to admit it was magnificent. The goalie had been outdone seamlessly - Goal Number One for the Besaid Aurochs. The audience went back to their fanatic screaming, their enthusiasm twofold now. Jecht sent a 'Hey! Told you so!' smirk my way, but it wasn't condescending. Surprisingly, I recognized the look; I'd worn it countless times.

But why the hell was Jecht looking for *my* approval?

No time to worry about it *now,* anyway. We had better things to do. I sent him a thumbs-up, turned back towards the other goal, and swam for my post again.

The exact same thing happened in the next round. The other team got the ball: our stronger players held mastery of it, taunting a single opponent: Brother fired it to a shooter.

This time it was me.

I held the ball in my hand, weighing my options. Doram was strong, but not that strong - I broke to her, and even though she managed to inflict a nasty Venom attack on me, I was free and clear.

What now?

A sphere shot would be plenty. But today called for some extravagance. And anyway, Yuna was watching. I promised her she'd see me play, and with that I'd promised her victory. Showing off would just make it all the better. But doing a Jecht Shot would only relate me and Dad. No, I'd made some improvements on the Jecht Shot, enough to call it the Jecht Shot II.

That would be just perfect. The goalie, Raudy, wouldn't even know what hit him. Literally - the shot would be invisible.

There were no opponents to knock out, so I went right into the routine. I didn't want to stop and look at Jecht to see his reaction, nor think about whether Yuna was watching, which of course she was, so I just concentrated on the spin, on the direction in which I would stop, how I would strike the ball...

Spin, stop, connect - the smack of the ball against your foot is amazingly gratifying, and the harder it hits, the better.

I closed my eyes, slightly disoriented from the spin, but grinned as the shot buzzer shouted in my ears. Of course the shot made it. Of course the sportscasters and audience alike were in flurries of excitement. 

Very faint, very softly, I heard the shrill, high sound of a whistle in the distance. From the stands, of course; and should I open my eyes, I could point out exactly where it came from.

Another whistle joined that one, weaker but just as enthusiastic, for a little duet of appreciation that made me - and my father, I was sure - smile.

I still didn't look his way to see his current expression; instead, I simply sent a quick hand-signal of victory to Brother to share the gloating, and made my way back to my post again.

The Goers didn't stand a chance.

**

I had gathered from Tidus' explanations of Zanarkand that his city's people were blitzball fanatics by nature, but I hadn't thought much of it. As soon as the game started, quiet, gentle Amia went through a startling personality change. I thought *Wakka* had been a vocal onlooker - but even he was outdone, and by far.

"Get 'im, Jecht, GET the bastard!" Amia yelled fiercely, her hands balled into fists and her eyes alight with something dangerous. "GET HIM!"

She glanced to her right then, looking at me and grinning an idiotic, enraptured grin. "Your first blitz game, huh?"

"Yes..."My smile was a sheepish one. "Sad, isn't it?"

"I guess not. This isn't Zanarkand, though, so I don't think I can really judge. Most kids have been to three or four blitz games by the time they hit second grade there." She turned her head back towards the pool momentarily and screamed a string of obscenites at Balgerda, who'd just managed to sneak the ball out of Giera's hands. After she'd finished, she turned back to me, no less pleased. "It doesn't matter if the score's 20 to 1; even if Jecht is practically doing his victory dance, I'm still going to be rooting for his team. The first half was great, wasn't it? Five minutes of Goer-crushing glory. I love it when it's one-sided."

"Oh, the first half was wonderful! You know, Amia...you'd think that the Goers would think it an honor to play in the same game as Sir Jecht. I don't think they really care if they lose. If I found myself out there, heaven forbid, I'd likely be handing it to him right in front of my goal. You know...? It seems like maybe there's more honor in losing to Jecht than in winning."

"Yeah. I wouldn't doubt it. But of course the Goers' coach will kill them if they don't try, so I wouldn't exactly count on a forfeit. Oh -- look!"

Jecht made another stunning shot, the hurtling blitzball just barely missing the goalie's head. Poor Raudy barely had time to blink. I clapped, delighted, while Amia leaned over the railing and whistled happily. She then yelled something I couldn't understand - she repeated it, beaming, and laughed to herself.

"What was that?"

"What was what?" Amia grinned. "What I just said?"

"Yes,"

"Oh, that's just a trade tongue the merchants used in Zanarkand. I picked it up in college, and I figured no one else here'd understand it, so hell, why not. I taught Jecht a bit of it. Enough to be able to tell when I was damning him to hell, anyway..."

"What'd you *say?*"

"Oh, just some ugly things about the Goers. I think somebody'd kick me out of here if I said it in a language they understood. Jecht'll have a laugh, at least,"

"If he heard you, that is."

"That's the beauty of it - he can't possibly! I'll tell him about it later, though."

The sheer pointlessness of it made me laugh. "So, you scream at the top of your lungs even when you know he can't hear you?"

She looked at me, smiling in a way that seemed to be empathetic and infinitely bitter at the same time. "What, don't *you?*"

Her tone was light, but her meaning serious. Amia was speaking of Tidus' absence, and Jecht's as well, for her. Perhaps we weren't very different at all...

"Yes, I have." I nodded simply, sensing that most of the humor in the conversation had died out with that. "Amia..."

"Hn, sorry." She smiled again, and I could sense that it wasn't at all forced. "I tend to get carried away like that. Always did. I still can't believe so much time has passed...since..."

"Don't think about it!" I interjected, and she looked surprised at how sharp my statement was. "Believe me, don't think about it! Just...smile. No matter how much it hurts. You're together now...right?"

She looked slightly confused, but the smile didn't leave her face - in a moment, it grew, just a little bit. "I'm sorry. I was always a worrywart."

"I had to smile...before Sin was defeated...because if I frowned I would make everyone else all the unhappier. It was near impossible to smile after Tidus left. But once he came back, he said he couldn't promise me he'd stay, but he could promise me that he'd be at my side as long as he was here...and that made me realize that every moment is precious. It isn't worth the time stewing over what happened then...all we have is now. You know...?"

Amia nodded. "You're right, Yuna. But it is sort of hard, once you slow down, and you have time to think..."

"I know. Just don't think about it, though; think about now. It stops you from being sad, at least to an extent...that's the purpose of blitzball here. To take away people's worries."

"Really, now. I don't think anyone ever bothered to think about *why* we had blitz in Zanarkand - it was just kind of a given. The pool had always been there; no one remembered when it'd been built."

Glancing at the scoreboard for a moment - 3 to 0, a little more than 1:30 left on the clock - I marveled at how quickly the game had gone by. No wonder people kept coming back. It was wonderful to watch, but it was seemingly over far too soon.

"I think the Aurochs are going to win...what do you think?" I laughed at Amia, pointing down to the water, where Tidus had just inflicted poor Raudy with sleep via Sleep Shot. 

"Hm, I wonder. That Tidus is a show-off, he is." Amia's smile returned eagerly. "I remember the first time I took him to a blitzball game. It was to watch his father, and when he saw Jecht do a Sphere Shot, he looked at me and said, 'Mama, I wanna be as good as Daddy when I grow up. I wanna be just like Dad.'"

"How cute," I mused.

"Oh, Jecht gloated over that for days; it was incredibly funny..."

"Is that why he pushed Tidus so hard?"

"Nn, I suppose...he was trying to be supportive, I think. He just really didn't have a clue how. It's a long story, but he didn't exactly have a stable family. I guess he just never learned support. But he did try. He did. Tidus may not have seen it, but I did...I think it took awhile for Tidus to realize how much Jecht was trying to be a good father." Amia's eyes twinkled with humor. "His kindnesses and affections were meant for women, not little boys. Even a son."

"A daughter would have been different, then?"

Amia seemed to pause at that, almost imperceptibly; she faltered, but only for a moment, and then her strange expression was gone. "Yes...I suppose it would have been...very different..."

"Did I say something wrong?"

"Oh, no, it's...nothing." She shook her head and smiled at me, but I knew that it wasn't nothing.

"Sorry to ask, I didn't mean to upset you. It's just that children in general are precious here -- life expectancy wasn't that high for a long time...but I suppose in a place like Zanarkand it's different, isn't it?"

"Yes...sometimes."

I sensed this was a tender subject -- and decided to drop it. "Oh, look at Brother...he isn't going to try to shoot, is he?"

"Hn?" Amia looked down at the pool, squinting slightly. "Oh, he sure is gonna shoot...see how he's inching his way to the goal? Damn, his EN must be out of this world..."

"Only forty-five seconds left! Is he gonna have time?"

"Brother wouldn't shoot if he didn't."

Four of the Goers' five men were on Brother's tail, and each one of them had a decent AT.

Thirty-eight. Balgerda managed to poison him.

Thirty-three. Bickson hit him hard, but Brother was still standing.

Twenty-eight. Graav tried to Sleep Tackle him, but to no avail - Brother evaded it entirely.

Twenty-three. Doram nearly got him - nearly! - but Brother endured, and found himself face-to-face with an open goal.

Wisely he didn't bother with a fancy shot - he just fired, simply fired, and for several moments time seemed to stop entirely.

And then a loud buzzer was heard, and the screaming in my ears was almost deafening. Three seconds left on the clock. The Aurochs, of course, had won.

Amia beamed, whooping enthusiastically for them, and then grabbed my arm. "Come on! Let's go see them!"

"Ah! We can *do* that? I mean...already?"

"Oh, yeah, they'll be just getting in. And assuming who you are, miss Grand Maestress, I don't think they're going to *refuse* you! Besides - your fiance's the coach!" She laughed. "Come on! Lead me. I don't know where I'm going,"

So I did. The crowd had just begun to disperse, and it wasn't that hard weaving through the masses of people that were leaving the stadium. Some of the onlookers recognized us and called out to us, but I had a feeling that Amia was somewhat trained in the art of avoiding screaming mobs - she kept her head down, shoved her way through, and didn't let go of my arm.

There was a brutish-looking man guarding the Aurochs' locker room, but he saw me and instantly scuffled out of the way to let Amia and me through. I grinned him a quick 'Thanks!' before opening the door and leading Amia in.

She broke free of me then and absolutely tackled Jecht, but that's all I stopped to see - I saw Tidus, stretching out a shoulder while he leaned against the wall of the locker room.

"Tidus!"

He looked up and grinned at me, so I scooted my way past Giera and, upon reaching him, threw my arms about his waist and reached up to kiss him. 

"That was wonderful!" A kiss, again, and he responded happily.

"Told you I'd win." Tidus chuckled. "Ah, Yuna, just watch the shoulder; I think I pulled something."

"Where?" 

He gestured to his right shoulder - his throwing arm - and I gingerly poked at it. "Here, I can use a spell to help -"

"No, it's alright." He smiled. "I don't mind being hurt sometimes. Give it a few days, and if it's still annoying me, then go ahead."

"Well...alright, I suppose...but what about this...?" I grazed my finger over a swelling on his jawline, and could see where a bruise would be within a few hours. He flinched when I touched it, which spawned a concerned look on my face.

"Ah, that's just a little present from Doram."

"It looks pretty bad...at least let me heal *this!* Are you sure the bone didn't crack? I mean -"

At that, Tidus laughed to himself, using his good arm and stroking my hair. "Yuna, I got off easy. Just a bruise - and sure, go ahead and work your magic on that, if you like."

"Blitz is dangerous..."

"Amen to that."

"Why do you still play?"

"Love of the sport, of course." He laughed silently to himself. "You never asked me why I still followed *you.* That was dangerous too."

"Tidus, are you saying I'm a *sport?*" I demanded, which made him laugh again; aloud this time.

He kissed me playfully. "Oh, yes. The devoted athlete must always look out for a chance to score."

"*Tidus!*"

"Well, are you gonna heal me or not? I don't mind a bruise or a pulled muscle now and then, but Doram packs a nasty punch."

"Of course," I matched his smile, and then pressed my fingers lightly to his wound, concentrating until I saw it take on an illuminated green tinge; a sign of success. I took my hand away, and the light faded. "There...the swelling should be gone by tonight."

"Feels better already." He pressed his forehead to mine, crossing his eyes and making me giggle. "Thanks. I love you."

"Love you too...you know, now I'm going to have to come to all of your games and make sure you don't get hurt too badly."

"What? Me? Get hurt? Hardly!"

"And here you are saying you got off easy...!"

His grin was sheepish, and he rubbed the back of his neck. "Alright, so I did. It's pretty dangerous. I've broken bones plenty of times."

"Oh, that just helps so much...now I'm going to be fully paranoid whenever you play," I glared at him good-naturedly.

"Well that's why you're here! To piece me back together."

"Yuna!" Jecht called, and I raised my head to look over at him. Amia had her arm linked in his, and wore the most delighted expression I'd ever seen...like all of her was just alight with happiness simply by touching him. It made me happy to see her that way.

"Yes?"

"We're staying in Luca for the night, right?"

"Yes, that's the plan,"

"Well...where?"

"Oh! It's on the other side of the sphere theatre, next to the pub and the cafe. Do you need rest?"

"Ah, no. Not now, anyway. I'm damn hungry. I know if I eat I'm gonna pass out soon after, though."

Amia laughed and slugged his arm in jest. "Jecht, you'd eat an elephant if it gave you half a chance. And you sleep half your life away. Sleep before a game - sleep after a game and after eating half the house."

"So?" He grinned.

"Well...why don't all four of us go down to the cafe and get something to eat?" I suggested.

"If there's food, I'm in." Jecht opted.

"Alright," Tidus nodded. "Sounds good."

"Well, wherever Jecht goes, Mia's sure to follow!" Amia added cheerfully, nudging Jecht again.

"Woman, stop beating me up, will you?"

"What? This, from the great Jecht?"

Jecht looked at me and grinned sheepishly. "I have a feeling I'm about to get a picking-on...can we go now?"

I laughed and nodded. "Of course,"

Heading for the entrance with Tidus in tow, I felt him grasp my hand tightly, and smiled.

"Come on!" I turned my head to grin at him, and tugged his hand as I stepped out of the room.

Once I saw the corridor in front of me, though, I stopped dead in my tracks.

It was packed full of people - people who looked frighteningly familiar. All of them. They stood silently, as if at attention, all staring at me calmly. 

All fayth. 

Every one of them martyrs. I had seen their faces not in life, but engraved and captured in the great wall along the path to Zanarkand from Gagazet.

That's when I noticed the little one - the child, forever cloaked in a worn, deep-violet garment. Holy. But he was all too frightening now.

My voice was pathetic, something akin to a whimper. "Tidus..." I clenched his hand firmly, but he made no sound.

The child called Bahamut walked forward and took my free hand in both of his, and it was shocking to find that he was fully real, fully...there, not some apparition. His hands were warm. Why was that so astounding?

His voice was not unkind, but his eyes were piercing, which for some odd reason I found alarming. I had no idea what he said; it was simply babble to me, though it sounded similar in tone to the language Amia had used earlier.

My eyes narrowed. "What?"

I heard Tidus swear under his breath.

"What, do you know what he said?" I pressed.

It was Amia who spoke. "He asked if you were afraid. Told you not to be. He said we aren't finished; he said there are still plenty of miracles for Spira's priestess to perform. Odd...he called you Sainted Yuna..."

I felt sick. Not again. Not again, not now, not when everything was just right... "Not again," I heard myself whisper angrily. "Leave me alone...leave us *alone!*"

"You don't want to send us away." Bahamut answered smoothly, in plain Spiran. "We would not call on you for nothing, Lady Yuna."

"I don't want anything to *do* with you!" I seethed. "Wasn't bringing the Eternal Calm enough? Wasn't losing Tidus sacrifice enough? What more can you possibly ask of me now?"

"You're the only one that can help us. Don't send us away. Just listen; aren't you known for your sympathy?"

"I don't want to lose him again. Not Tidus, not Amia, not Jecht."

"I had reasons for sending them. You would not have helped us if he wasn't here." Bahamut's gaze turned to Tidus.

I was truly disgusted. "My family, bribes...how *sick.*"

"If you don't help us, there's nothing we can do for you. Or your lover. Or Spira, for that matter..."

I took a deep breath. In that short time Tidus squeezed my hand, a vague but present reassurance. It was also something akin to a death sentence. I knew what I had to do, then; and I realized that our story was indeed far from finished.

"I'll listen," I quietly agreed, dread already seeping into the corners of me; I found myself more afraid than I'd been since Sin. "but I hope to god your story's a good one."

___________________

A/N: *Gasp!* Someone finally figured it out...! o_o;;

Noelle was the first to point out that this story has been almost entirely pointless, insofar as real plot goes. 

Was this enough plot movement for ya? XD

And yes, it is necessary for me to show the backgrounds of the characters. It may not be necessary in the story, but I can't write a novel-length piece without character background in it. It's just my thing. It lays a solid groundwork for...uh...later ;D And it shows the development of the character as well. DCT is meant to be novel-length, able to stand on its own but also able to clump together with Remembrance, Always and a few other fics I'm planning (*devious cackle* Not like the biggest ones are announced in my info or anything O-o ), and there's something about me that won't let me write a novel without making the reader understand a little bit about why each character acts the way they do. It may seem to drag out, but scan through the entire story and pretend you're reading it the first time; it looks better when you don't have several weeks' wait in between chapters. x_X I promise.

So there! :P


	13. Waltz for Possibility

Pre-chapter A/N: For this chapter, you'll have to dust off every little bit of technical information you've ever learned about the pyreflies, Yu Yevon, and Sin. This chapter's very informative and as straightforward as I could make it, but if you wanna go in-depth, it can take a substantial amount of brainpower to hack through. If there's something you don't understand, by all means, mention it in a review or email me your questions ^^: I'll be glad to clarify. Make sure you've read Chapter Seven in its entirety before pursuing this. Oh, and BTW, beware of some light Yuna/Tidus saucy-fluff at the end ^_~ No, this isn't gonna be a lemon. Lemons are hard to write. x_x; And besides, I find myself lacking in the proper experience. XD So just read the chapter already, ya? Leave the poor author alone! =p  
  
*********  
  
Per Yuna's request and a small compensatory sum, meals were brought from the cafe to the inn where she and her party would be staying for the night.  
The High Maestress had reunited with the rest of her company, but the young fayth had asked that they not be present at this impromptu meeting. The only ones that this problem concerned at the moment, he had reasoned, were the ones present at their first meeting. Jecht, Amia, Yuna. Tidus. Yuna had not understood, had insisted that all of her party be present; at that, young Bahamut had seemed to become angry, and reminded her that it was not worth the time arguing over who would be present. They could relay the specifics to their peers later on. Time was precious. So, Yuna gave in.  
And here they sat, on the edge of a bed or on the floor or on a couch, wherever fit. Save for the occasional clink of fork against plate as they dined, all was silent. Bahamut, who had chosen not to eat, had not said a word. Each minute added a little aggrevation to Yuna's temper - here this child-fayth had burst in, proclaimed that after all she had done she was not finished yet, and now chose to sit in utter silence before them. Time. He was wasting time, which he had claimed was dear to them. Hypocrite. She could not help hating him at this moment. Here, sitting right before her, was a blatant threat to everything she held dear - and she could do nothing about it.  
Yuna rose and set her plate down on the small table near the door.  
"So," She began softly, though her tone could have sliced through steel. "Now that you've sat here for nearly half an hour and not said a word, can we begin?"  
The little fayth turned his head to look at her. His voice was calm and matter-of-fact, as always. "Please. Sit down."  
Yuna returned to the loveseat she shared with Tidus. He in turn set his unfinished plate on the floor, preparing himself for listening.  
"Why...are you here?" asked Yuna.  
Bahamut turned to face her, and his tone was bitter. "You know why."  
"No...I don't,"  
"Surely you've realized it by now."  
"Realized...*what?*"  
"What can the fayth not live without? What is the root of their existence - the reason for their being?"  
"Sin." answered Amia.  
"No."  
"Not Sin," Yuna shook her head. "Yu Yevon."  
"Correct. Yu Yevon and Sin are symbiotes; we are symbiotic as well, to Yu Yevon."  
Amia sat silent, listening intently. Jecht shook his head and sighed, and that was when Tidus stood up.  
"So you're saying that you can't exist without Yu Yevon. And Yu Yevon can't exist without you."  
"Not quite. We do not depend on each other as true symbiotes do...but if one exists, so must the other. That is why we are here."  
"Because this Yu Yevon guy's still alive!" Amia interjected sharply, as if she'd realized how to create money out of thin air.  
"Yes. And no."  
"What do you mean, 'yes and no?'"  
Bahamut's tone was level, patient. "You have killed his physical body, yes?"  
"Yes, of course, that's -"  
"And once a being dies..." He began, and something in Yuna's mind clicked.  
"It becomes a fiend, unless it's sent..." Yuna answered slowly.  
"But Yu Yevon *was* sent. Your Lady Maestress surely only intended to send us aeons, but Yevon went along, as well."  
"Then what's the problem...? If he's sent, all should be well...right?" Yuna pressed.  
"The problem is that even in death he still performs his tasks. Gather the dead. Consume the souls, grow stronger..."  
Tidus sat back down heavily, having nothing more to say. Jecht's glare was aimed solely at the fayth. "Hold on, just wait a minute. So what exactly are we facing here?"  
"Let me continue. Yu Yevon, even as a pyrefly, performs what he has performed for a millenium. He gathers other souls and uses them to build up his strength. Many, many of the pyreflies have already suffered an untimely cessation of life."  
"And what exactly do you want us to do? Catch him in a butterfly net, put him in a bottle, and let people see him for a Gil?" Jecht grumbled.  
"You have to kill him, of course. If this continues, all of Lady Yuna's work will be undone! Yevon will in time grow so strong in his life- force that he will be able to revive his physical armor: Sin. That *must* not happen, or the cycle will merely begin anew."  
"Sir Bahamut, but if Yu Yevon is....killing...the pyreflies...why is Tidus here? Or Jecht, or Amia?"  
Bahamut seemed to sigh slightly, but it gave the feeling of weariness, not impatience. "That is what my brothers looked on as undesirably necessary. The Lady Maestress is the only one with enough experience to have any hope of successfully ridding the Farplane of this...*plague* - but of course, she would undeniably be too sick with grief to help us in her state of mourning. Resurrections are rare events, but this was an emergency case, and it was the only way that Yuna would comply. So, we resurrected the pyrefly called Tidus. And then we began looking at Yevon's rate of consumption - each day, more pyreflies were being devoured. I discussed it with my brethren, and it was agreed on that we should resurrect the more...important figures. It would be of better use to our cause, make for a faster finishing of this unfortunate turn of events. But they, too, had their ties. This is why you see the woman Amia here with you. Jecht is vital to you. Amia is vital to Jecht. It all intertwines. We *must* have efficiency in this, and if that means a few more resurrections, then so be it."  
"Well, then, why can't you just resurrect *everyone?*" Amia asked. "If there aren't any more pyreflies for Yevon to consume - "  
"That would not be practical. There are likely over a billion pyreflies present in the Farplane -- what would Spira do if suddenly, a billion of its dead were back on its surface? Your nations may be flourishing, but that doesn't mean that Spira can feed a billion of its past citizens. There would be a famine -- a good number of them would just die again. Besides that, there would be no place for them to live. Like Besaid, many of the places on Spira only expand to accomodate their current populations, which grow slowly no matter what, over time; it takes years. It would wipe out Spira's resources. Thus, we only feel it necessary to help the souls vital to our cause."  
Yuna had no ethical protest this time - she knew that the fayth was right, saddening as it might seem.  
Instead, she seemed slightly confused and altogether a bit hopeful. She risked a questioning look at Tidus, then Bahamut. "If it was a resurrection, then...if we..."  
Bahamut smiled, just a little. "He was real once, and he is real now. Our fates do not determine his."  
"So...he's..."  
"He's as real as you are, Lady Maestress. Mortal to the bone, as always; he will have to figure out his own way to die. I might recommend, however, that he wait a few decades. After doing so much complaining about the way his life was cut short twice, it would be a pity if he were to die *now.*"  
Yuna's face was alight with joy when she looked at Tidus; he in turn grasped her hand firmly, head down.  
"Thank you..."  
"Pure circumstance." Bahamut shook his head. "There is no reason to thank us. We are doing what we must do to preserve peace. This is not a personal favor, as much as you might like to think so."  
"Well that's no fun," snorted Amia. "The least you could do is *pretend* it was for them. Spare the moment, for god's sake. Look at how happy she is!"  
Yuna shot a sheepish grin at Amia, who laughed.  
"Very well. You're welcome." Bahamut nodded evenly. "But we still do not perform personal favors."  
"Ah...Sir Bahamut, what about you? You're here...are you not? Does that mean you're resurrected as well?" Yuna queried softly.  
Bahamut audiby sighed. "We aeons can no longer reside in our former homes, the Chambers of the Fayth. We could not reach you that way, and so resurrecting ourselves was thought to be the only way to be able to communicate with you. You wouldn't have figured it out on your own, you see - Sin would reappear, eventually, and you would have no idea why. It would be far too late then. We *had* to reach you now."  
"What about all the other fayth that were with you? What are they for?"  
"My brethren and I -- all of us, since the defeat of Yu Yevon, resided in the Farplane as pyreflies, like the rest of the dead. A few stayed behind, but the majority of the fayth decided that becoming mortal once again, as they were in the beginning of their lives, was better than being sacrificed to the hungry soul of what was once Yu Yevon. If we are no more, we are utterly useless. We sacrificed ourselves, martyred ourselves, to help the fight against Yu Yevon; what could we possibly do if we were erased from existence?"  
"I understand. You're welcome to travel with us, Sir Bahamut, if that's what you wish." Yuna smiled.  
"Yes. That will do. Thank you." He nodded. "In that case I must request that you alter any traveling plans you might have -- it is important that we reach the Farplane as soon as possible."  
"It's already taken care of." said Tidus. "We were planning to hit Guadosalam next anyhow."  
"When are you departing from Luca?"  
"We've already made arrangements to stay here tonight, so I suppose we can depart in the morning. Is that alright?" asked Yuna.  
Bahamut nodded once. "That will do. If you wish to go inform your party of this now, feel free..."  
Jecht rose, and Amia followed suit within a moment. Bahamut turned to the man.  
"You. Sin."  
"I thought I retired from that job." Jecht scowled.  
"You were the last one. He's going to try to reach for you...try to retake control. You're important to this."  
Jecht didn't even blink. "I doubt I'd be here if I wasn't, so why're you telling *me?*"  
"Stay alive. That's all I ask of you, just for now. We'll need you once we reach the Farplane."  
Amia had gripped Jecht's hand while Bahamut spoke - she looked nervous. Jecht, on the other hand, looked unconcerned. "I hope you're not planning for me to distract the bastard and get eaten while the rest of these guys zap him to death or something."  
It was the fayth's turn to scowl. "We've all poured too much effort into bringing you back here. Do you really think we would be so careless?"  
"Ah...Sir Bahamut, Sir Jecht, please..." Yuna cut in, interrupting the two. "If you're going to bicker, can you at least wait until we're outside?"  
Both of them grumbled darkly to themselves, but Yuna's motherly tone commanded them, and they stayed relatively silent. Yuna bowed slightly to Bahamut and then to Tidus' parents. "Thank you."  
Jecht left the room first, followed as always by his wife, then Bahamut.  
Yuna turned to Tidus and gave him an elated grin. Laughing, he embraced her tightly, kissing her temple with a smile to match her own.  
"C'mon," Tidus took her hand and kissed her once, and together they left the room.  
When they got outside, Bahamut was nowhere to be seen.  
"Where'd Bahamut go?" Yuna asked Jecht, and he shrugged.  
"Off somewhere, I guess. He'll be back."  
Jecht went back to saying something to Kimahri and Lulu - Amia was cheerfully chiming in from time to time, in her usual manner. Yuna glanced at Tidus, and he glanced back, both of them beaming with conspiratory agreement. Tidus took one step back, tugging lightly on her hand, and she followed one step - two, three, and Tidus turned to the stairway heading towards Mi'ihen Highroad. Laughing, he pulled lightly on her arm; she ran with him.  
"Hey! Where're *they* running off to?" Rikku peered at the fleeing couple. "They could have at least *said* they were taking lunchbreaks!"  
Amia approached her, looking amused. "Don't worry about them. They'll be back, but I doubt we should expect them anytime soon. We'll tell you what happened."  
  
*****  
  
"Race you!" Yuna nudged Tidus' side, then let go of his hand and sprinted up the steps.  
"Hey!" Her companion laughed, bounding after her. "Come back here!"  
It was easy for Tidus to catch up to her, but he stayed just behind, not wanting to grab her and have her fall from loss of balance. Yuna reached the top of the stairways first, turning to face Tidus but backing away from him. He in turn surged forward and seized her around the waist, easily lifting her up. She shrieked and laughed, feigning a struggle to escape until he held her firmly enough so she couldn't fight him at all. Yuna laughed lightly then, still flushed with playful energy, and kissed her lover. He returned the affection and set her down.  
It was with eyes closed that Yuna then accepted a thousand light, soft kisses, each just barely touching her lips. She thought it odd - he seemed to be in a strange mood now. More playful than usual, which could be attributed to the fact that his life had just been spared, but still...  
Yuna pulled away and smiled up at him quizzically. "What's all this, hm? Just happy...?"  
He planted a kiss on her forehead and nodded, burying his nose in her hair. "You wouldn't believe how happy."  
"I'm glad..."  
"You're gonna be mad, but...don't kill me. I love you. Well...regardless of what I said...I didn't expect to stay. At all...and that's why I wouldn't promise you...all I could do was act positive."  
Yuna didn't seem angry; just slightly confused. "Then...well, when you first came back, you said...you lied-"  
"No!" Tidus shook his head fervently. "I just...couldn't bear to say what I really thought would happen. I thought maybe if I said aloud that I was staying, it would be true. Stupid, I know. I didn't have a clue how long I'd have with you. I thought...I guess I thought if I told you not to expect me to stay, you'd be afraid. It'd make you sad. I tried to tell you as best I could the morning we left Besaid, but..." He paused for a moment, laughing to himself. "All that came out was the Zanarkand version of 'Marry me, woman!'"  
Yuna laughed as well then, but quietly. "You know I wouldn't say no to you."  
"That's what *I'm* glad for."  
Her eyes sparkled mischief. "Well, what if I *had* said no?"  
Tidus' grin was a quirky one. "It would have been a very unexpected move on your part. I was counting on the fact that you'd say yes. Oh, I'd have whined a bit, and begged, pleaded, and probably groveled..."  
Yuna giggled. "You know me too well,"  
"Yeah. But then again I can never know my Yuna *too* well."  
"Oh, it's *your* Yuna...?"  
"Hey! Better me than anyone else, right?"  
Yuna smiled and nuzzled his shoulder. "Of course. I wasn't complaining; I like that."  
"Well, that's good. Here, come on. It's been awhile since we were last here, huh?"  
Tidus took Yuna's hand, strolling over to the railing.  
"I guess..." she agreed. "It's beautiful."  
And it was. The sun had just begun to set, draping the city with a reddish-orange glow. The view they had was spectacular - both of them could see everything.  
"So we don't have to laugh like maniacs this time...?" Tidus smirked.  
Yuna chuckled, shaking her head. "No, not this time."  
"Alright."  
"No one's coming up here from the city...I wonder why. People are always passing along this way because of the Highroad..."  
"Betcha Lulu's probably stopping them or something."  
"*Lulu?*"  
He laughed. "Hey, it's worth a try..."  
"She accused me of...! Well, I mean, she thought we - she'd never..."  
Tidus laughed again. "She'd never give us a second alone, huh?"  
"Something like that," smiled Yuna sheepishly.  
"Well, then, maybe it's Kimahri." Tidus opted, slipping an arm around her waist.  
"In that case, he'd probably frighten the poor travelers. They'd all be afraid to come near the Highroad ever again!"  
"Good point. Probably Rikku, then."  
"Well that's possible...though she'd be too busy peeking at us."  
Tidus grinned. "Yeah, true. Hm...oh well. Come with me; this way!"  
"Huh?"  
Yuna's lover took her hand and led her up the steps to Mi'ihen Highroad. "Just come on!"  
"Where're we going?"  
"Not far." He tugged on her hand, veering off the trail to the right, his boots crunching loudly through the waist-deep brush. "It's a great view, I promise. Even better than before. I found this place when we all split up and went monster-catching...remember that? Yeah...see that big rock, over there?" Tidus pointed, and she could see a long, relatively flat boulder sitting on the edge of the bluff that overlooked Luca. Yuna nodded. "It overlooks *everything.* I didn't have the chance to show it to you during the pilgrimage. No time, really...here, c'mon! The view's gotta be *perfect* right now..."  
He kept stepping through the brush towards his destination, but he stopped once he saw it, and a displeased look crossed his face; Yuna saw.  
"What is it?"  
Tidus pointed; little Bahamut was already there, back turned to them and facing the sunset, sitting cross-legged and perfectly still, as if in meditation.  
"Well, there goes another romantic moment," Tidus mumbled to himself. Yuna did not hear - she had already begun to approach the child.  
"Sir Bahamut!" Yuna called, but the young fayth didn't move. She called again more softly, but Bahamut didn't so much as turn around. Yuna stepped forward, touching his back lightly; he didn't make any move to retreat, nor did he particularly welcome the touch. "Are you alright...?"  
"Tidus." said the motionless fayth, and his voice was almost shaky as he switched between tongues. "V'ant. Go."  
"Eh? Uh, okay..." Tidus sent a half-confused look to Yuna, and she shrugged, before holding up one finger. Time - she just wanted a moment. He nodded and retreated a hundred feet or so, busying himself with picking the burrs out of his boots.  
When he looked up several minutes later, he found himself surprised. Yuna sat cross-legged beside the fayth on the large rock, her head turned to him, and Bahamut evidently talking - explaining something, for his hands often made quick gestures. Yuna wasn't smiling - she seemed, actually, to be closely concentrating, thinking about whatever it was Bahamut was saying to her. And then he stopped; his head seemed to droop, he seemed to sigh. Yuna's hand stroked his head, then rested on his shoulder. He saw her give a smile, a comforting smile, to Bahamut and then stroke his back once. He said something again, and it made Yuna chuckle; Tidus could tell she was thoughtful in her response, for she had that familiar, slightly distant look on her face as she spoke. She seemed to frown as she continued; likely speaking of something to do with her pilgrimage. Once she'd finished, Bahamut apparently made some remark, which caused her to show one of her gracious smiles. Gracious, for Yuna, was either when she didn't know what to say or when she felt some sort of empathy.  
She turned and slid off the rock, and Bahamut followed slowly. Yuna offered him her hand, and he took it - Tidus could have sworn he saw the child smile, just a little.  
"Tidus!" Yuna called, beckoning. "Come on!"  
He jogged to meet her, and she kissed him happily when he did. "Sorry about that."  
"It's fine...so, what's up?"  
"Well...Bahamut might have a plan. He's still working on it, though...he'll probably have it figured out by the morning."  
"That's good. So, what is it?"  
"He hasn't said," Yuna shrugged.  
"I'm not sure whether it will work." Bahamut said evenly. "I'll either tell you in the morning or discard the idea completely."  
"Ah."  
Without prelude, Bahamut turned from them and began walking back towards Luca.  
"Eh?" Tidus quirked an eyebrow at Yuna in question. She smiled.  
"He told me a little bit about his situation. It took some explaining - that's what took so long."  
"Why didn't he want me there?"  
Yuna's smile turned fond and motherly; she lightly kissed his cheek. "He didn't want you to see him crying. He's just a child, Tidus, believe it or not. And he looks up to you for what you've done. He's doing his best to help us; take it easy on him."  
"After being alive for so long, he's still a kid?"  
"He was sacrificed before he turned eight. Seven years old, Tidus...what kind of a life is that? He said that no matter what they may learn or how they grow mentally, they always look the same as they did upon sacrifice. He's a child, and he'll sometimes respond in childish ways, though he does his best not to. Give him a bit of a break...this is hard for him. He hasn't been mortal in a very long time."  
Tidus nodded. "Gotcha. I think we should go back, then...we'll hit this place another time, huh?"  
"I'm sorry."  
"Naw, don't be. Lulu'll hate me if I keep you too long, anyway."  
Yuna smiled and kissed him. "Alright then. How'd Bahamut say it, then? Vont?"  
"V'ant. But that's more of an order. Like...'you -- go!' V'anden is the plural we'd use here. Let's go. V'anden."  
"Got it. V'anden!"  
He took her hand and grinned. "Noiche t'anu."  
"And what's that mean?"  
"You learn quickly."  
"Oh, well then...noochy thanoo to you too!"  
Tidus laughed. "Close enough. Let's go."  
  
The rest of the evening was uneventful. Jecht and Amia retired to their room early, upon which they were soon forgotten about; Rikku and Wakka went down to the cafe to see what the newscasters thought of the star- studded blitzball match earlier in the day. Kimahri went hunting, likely out of sheer boredom. There was little to do, which was fine with everyone present. Tidus' blitz game was catching up to him; he grew sleepy, so retreated to his room for a catnap that was to last the rest of the evening. Lulu and Yuna spent the remainder of their time beginning wedding plans; Lulu was, to Yuna's surprise, quite eager to help.  
Time passed; Kimahri returned, full and content, and stalked straight to his room. Wakka returned, followed by a Rikku that was bickering playfully at him in Al Bhed, talking a mile a minute. After spending a little more time with Lulu and Yuna, both of them, too, retired for the evening.  
But when Yuna went to bed, she did not sleep.  
She waited, silent, until she was sure even Lulu was fast asleep. Then she rose, slipped silently out of her room, and carefully crept into Tidus'.  
Yuna smiled to herself at his face in repose; there was an innocently sweet child-like look to him that she loved to just simply stare at time and time again. But she was not there for staring.  
She slipped beneath the covers and nestled against Tidus' side, surprising herself at how easily it was done, as if she did that sort of thing her entire life. That didn't wake him, though - Yuna nudged his ribs lightly, but he only gave a soft grumble in response.  
"Wake up," she whispered softly. Nothing. "Tidus!"  
Convinced that he was either unconscious or playing a trick on her, she paused to think.  
Yuna propped herself up with one arm on his chest and kissed him lightly. It was to no avail, though she could have sworn he moved, just a little. She could feel him breathing, feel his heart beating - he wasn't *dead.* And for as long as she had traveled with him, he had always been a light sleeper, able to wake at the slightest noise. This was a trick - definitely a trick. Yuna kissed him again, longer and sweeter, daring him to keep still. She could feel the tiniest restraint in him, and smiled to herself.  
She kissed him once more, taking his lower lip between her teeth and tugging on it.  
"Wake up already!" she mumbled.  
"Mmmmm." he chuckled approvingly. "Alright, alright." Tidus wrapped an arm around her, pulling her close against him. "Hey."  
"I *thought* you were playing a trick on me..." grinned Yuna accusingly.  
"Mm. Sorry. Do that again?"  
Yuna laughed quietly, trying to keep silent, and shook her head. "No, you're awake now."  
"Well here, lemme go back to sleep - ow! ...Okay, okay, you win." smiled Tidus, after suffering a brutal poke in the ribs from his lover. "So, what's the matter?"  
"Well...nothing really...I don't know, I'm just nervous, I guess. I'm sorry." She lay her head on his shoulder.  
"Whatcha nervous about, huh? The wedding...? Or this thing that Bahamut just dumped on us?"  
"Oh, no, not the wedding at all! I can't wait," Yuna smiled, but the smile soon faltered. "It's Bahamut I suppose...it just...I don't know...I guess I'm afraid that...no matter what he says....."  
Yuna trailed off on the sentence, and Tidus knew what she meant. Afraid that no matter what Bahamut said, he would be snatched away again. It wasn't an idea foreign to him - it had been worrying him since Bahamut told them of this plight.  
Tidus nodded. "I understand. It's making me a bit nervous, too. But you know what?"  
"What?"  
With a slight grunt of effort Tidus rolled, pinning Yuna beneath him, much to her surprise. He propped himself up above her on his elbows and kissed the edge of her mouth lightly. "I'm marrying the most wonderful woman in the world; I'm here with you, and I love you, and to hell with everything else...okay, so I don't know what'll happen tomorrow, or when we get to Guadosalam, but...I know we've got tomorrow. And today. And right now. I don't really think we can change what's gonna happen...we've got to finish this. I think Bahamut's telling the truth; I don't think I'm going anywhere. But there's that 'maybe.' Well...that's all it is. A *maybe.* Don't worry about it unless it becomes a certainty, which I seriously doubt it will. You've got too much to worry about otherwise. I'll help you with that as best I can, but please, Yuna, don't worry about what'll happen to me. You know full well I'll be at your side as long as I'm here. But if I have to leave...Yuna...if it'll save everyone, if it'll save *you,* then -"  
"Then don't." Yuna gripped his arm with a force that surprised him. "Just don't do it. You told me the same thing once. Just don't do it. You're being a hypocrite, anyway. Telling me not to worry when you're doing just that...good Yevon, Tidus, I tell you I'm a little nervous and you go into a heroic spiel about how you'll sacrifice anything under the sun for me and Spira. That's not what I want. I have you back, and it's not fair that you're so ready to go jump out on a limb and forsake that so soon. Just be greedy with this for once...I want to be able to pretend that all we have ahead of us is a simple life, at least for awhile. And I want to believe that when I'm old and grey I'll still have you snoring beside me when I wake up, and I want it to be *true,* Tidus. At least give me that much. That's all I want."  
"Well, put it on your Christmas list, and we'll see what we can do."  
"Tidus, that's *not funny...*" She protested, hiding a grin.  
"Eh...well...maybe not. But I tried."  
Yuna smiled. "That's important."  
"Here, see? Got you smiling again. There we go."  
Yuna's hand reached up, gently toying with a lock of her lover's hair. "It's strange...I don't feel like I need to smile all the time now...even though I have more responsibilities than ever, and everyone is surely depending on me even more. You know, I didn't even *want* to be High Maestress...I just wanted to be left alone. Is that selfish?"  
Tidus turned his head and kissed the inside of her arm. "No way. You just said it a moment ago, Yuna; you want a simple life. There's not a person in the world who could argue with that."  
"There are people who would take my place in a heartbeat,"  
"But no one who could do it better than you do. I *told* you you were the best summoner out there. Remember?"  
Yuna nodded. "That was a long time ago,"  
"So? Hasn't changed."  
"And that's why I'm keeping my position. There's no one else to do it."  
"Y'know...give it a couple years, wait until there's someone you know well enough that you're sure they could do it just fine, and you could always step down..."  
"Maybe," admitted Yuna, "but not for a long time." Then she grinned up at Tidus, and laughing to herself added, "I'll probably be a crabby old matron by then."  
"And I bet you're gonna look just as beautiful at forty-five as you do at seventeen."  
"Eighteen," Yuna corrected cheerfully.  
Tidus smiled and kissed her. "Oh, since when?"  
"The last week of summer; harvest time. Or, about a month ago..."  
"What, no particular date?"  
"Oh, I'm sure one of the old women in the village would know, but I never much paid attention to days. Time was time, you know? I spent a lot of my childhood in the temple. My parents would certainly know, but they're not exactly...*here,*" she explained. "But always in the last week of summer harvest people would stop by and bring little gifts. And when it was another person's birthday, Noma would take me and we would give them gifts in return. But the exact day wasn't really considered important. Harvest time's too busy for that."  
"Mm. Who's Noma?"  
"One of the old nuns at the temple. She died a few years ago, but she acted as surrogate mother to me in the beginning. She was old-fashioned, but you would have liked her. And she would have absolutely adored you." Yuna laughed. "She used to tell me right out loud in public who I should marry and who I shouldn't. It was...embarrassing." She took on an old woman's voice. "'Now Yuna, don't go wedding a traveling merchant or something, you hear me? They're gone all the time - not a speck of honor in that, and no children out of it, either! See that one, over there - he'd make a fine husband, he would! A tradesman, a tradesman's a fine match for you. Respectable, honest work there. And you've plenty of time to tend to him - why, you'll be surrounded by little ones within a decade!' She had a horrible case of granny lust."  
"*Granny lust?*" asked Tidus, crinkling up his nose.  
"The intense desire of an old woman to see her grandchildren before she dies, and bounce them on her knee, and things like that. She insisted that I was going to have lots of children. End of story. There was no arguing with Mam Noma."  
Tidus laughed, nuzzling her jaw. "What would she've said about me?"  
"Mm...you mean now, or when you first came to Spira?"  
"Both,"  
"Well, in the beginning she would have taken one look at you and said no. She had nothing against athletes, but you *were* kind of shallow...however dashingly handsome. She didn't like muscleheads at all," Yuna blushed, and her companion grinned.  
"Hey, are you calling me a brainless *jock?*"  
"Well, you *were...!*"  
Tidus chuckled to himself and kissed her neck lightly. "Alright, alright, so I *was.* Go on?"  
"But now? Well...she'd have made sure we knew each others' names, at least, and then she would have dragged us to the altar without a second thought. Oh, she'd have loved you to death, Tidus. Who knows, she might have renounced her nunhood and married you herself!"  
"Uh, no thanks..." Tidus kissed her neck again, lips lingering on her skin. Yuna let him for a few moments, enjoying the unsolicited gesture of affection.  
"You know, I can't think when you do that..." Yuna poked him, and his breath was warm on her as he laughed.  
"Well, good." Tidus continued; again Yuna allowed him to, closing her eyes and relaxing under his touch. "Do you mind?"  
She smiled, muttering a quiet 'no.' When his kisses traveled to her earlobe, however, she lightly pinched his side and laughed. "Fiend,"  
"Mmm. Maybe." admitted Tidus happily, nosing her jawline. He raised his head and kissed her chin, then her lips once, lightly, before smiling fondly at her. "Happy birthday. I'll have to get you something. What do you want?"  
Yuna reached up to briefly meet his lips with hers, and spoke calmly. "You."  
"Hmm!" Tidus smirked, playfully interested. "I would have expected you to want to wait, but hey, if you really wanna -"  
"Oh, you! You know I didn't mean it like that," his lover scolded with a laugh. "Well...at least not until the wedding."  
"Which will be as soon as possible, right?" Tidus pressed enthusiastically. Yuna smiled.  
"As soon as everything's ready. I'm not settling for an impromptu wedding, no matter what you say. It's the best day of a woman's life - you can't cut that short."  
"Aw, I'm just kidding. I don't mind waiting, but I see absolutely no reason not to complain about it."  
"Well...Uncle Cid isn't coming until late in the morning, so I'll have time to see one of the Luca dressmakers, and maybe make some arrangements...oh, I'll have to bring Lulu and Rikku, they'll just *die* over some of the dresses they have here!"  
  
"What, you've looked?"  
Yuna looked a little sheepish. "Well, what woman *hasn't?*"  
"Ah. One of those girl things, huh?"  
"You could say that. I told you once that Spira was a little short on fun...well, marriages and their preparations can make an entire village lively and content. And especially for the bride, because she gets spoiled to death, at least for awhile." Yuna smiled broadly. "It's one of the happiest parts of her life. It's even better than blitzball,"  
Tidus looked skeptical. "Better than blitz, huh? You sure about that?"  
Yuna laughed lightly. "Yes, I'm sure. You might not believe it, but women love weddings more than any sport out there."  
"Naah, it's too hard to believe." He joked. "Love you."  
"Love you,"  
"So really, what do you want? You name it, you get it."  
Yuna relaxed, laying her head flat against the pillow to stare past Tidus, at the ceiling, in contemplation. It was a long moment before she answered; and when she did, her eyes locked with his .  
"...Time. Just time." Her hands slipped around the back of his neck, fingers interlocking and pulling his head down to hers. He kissed her, long and deep, musing to himself that that must be about as much as she would *let* him do. Had he been in this particular situation in Zanarkand, it would have been a perfectly acceptable course of action to let his hands roam over her body aimlessly, which they itched to do; his better judgement prevented it. Yuna wouldn't care for it; she'd already told him no, however subtly. He could not remember caring, at any time in Zanarkand, what his significant others of any particular time period wanted. It didn't matter. Even if it had, he wouldn't have cared. Blitz was his life, and women just happened to come along as a convenience.  
Yuna was no convenience.  
Independent, stubborn, headstrong, with a natural beauty that just didn't exist in Zanarkand - following her had oftentimes meant trouble, but it was worth every second. She made it worth every second.  
Yuna was currently doing just that; her arms had wound around his neck, and she was enthusiastically returning his kiss. It was making coherent thinking difficult.  
She stopped suddenly, laughing to herself, and unwound one arm from his neck. She gripped his hand tightly then, and it made Tidus snap out of his daze - he realized it had been gradually wandering up her ribcage, toward a goal he was working to keep out of his mind. "Ah! Uh...sorry, wasn't thinking..." He mumbled sheepishly before taking his hand away.  
"I didn't come in here to be *groped,* Tidus, no matter what *you* want," Yuna replied cheerfully, unoffended. "You'll have to wait a little while for that."  
Tidus feigned a sigh, exaggerating a droop. Yuna laughed and kissed his nose. "Here, come on. I just want to stay close to you tonight; can I? Please?"  
He smiled. "You don't even have to ask."  
Tidus moved off of her and stretched out, bringing her close into his arms.  
"I love you," She murmured into his collar.  
"Love you too. Is this gonna be routine, now?"  
"Hmm?"  
"Crawling into each others' beds in the middle of the night?"  
Yuna smiled, her eyes already closed, drowsily. "Mmmhmm."  
"Okay. Sweet dreams, Yuna."  
She did not respond; she only held him close as sleep claimed them.  
  
_________________________________  
  
A/N: Awww. n_n Go Tidus and Yuna. Hehe. This chapter was actually pretty fun to write...I dunno, but I think FF.net's state of disfunction kinda helped me. =3 I didn't waste time staring morbidly at odd stories and lamenting yet again over the sorry state of the FFX category. As most of my fellow authors know by now, I loathe pointless/stupid fics with the most profound abhorrence known to man. ^_^ Also you may have noticed a relationship between my Macalania one-shot fic and Yuna's 'birthday request' in this chapter ... Time. If you haven't read the one shot, go give it a peek!  
  
Please tell me if the saucefluff seems a little OOC...I tried to make it as in-character as possible, but it's GOT to have some level of OOCness if Yuna's being saucy at all. =B And seeing as Yuna doesn't go around seducing Tidus left and right...it's kinda hard to write a Yuna that's anything but proper and pure. (Though it would be interesting if she DID go around trying to seduce him left n' right...muhaha. Lustful Yuna. XD Scary.)  
  
Speaking of which! (Timmeh, here we go! Whoo! It'sh now offishal. :D ) I will be taking time off from Ch. 14 to write a one-shot...^_~ You'll see what it is, but it's my one (probably only) attempt at humor. Inspired by Fire Rules' AMV review rut...;-; Poor Timmeh! Of course, that'll have to wait for awhile, because I'm goin' to Texas (again ^_^ ) to accompany my grandmother and my cousin, who are moving out there, so they don't get lost on the Greyhound. Hehee. Won't be back until somewhere between the 7th-9th. Gomennasai about the delay, but hey, you'll never see me miss a chance to leave stinky California for awhile! ^_^ Who knows, maybe I can scribble out some of Ch. 14 on paper. XD! An'....an'...I GET TO TEACH 5 OF MY CUTIE-PIE COUSINS HOW TO SWIM! YAAAY! o_o; Okay, I'm done now.  
  
And I get to take the train back. All by myself. n_n About two days before Amtrak goes kapoopie. Hmmn...I've never been on a train before! =3 I feel like Selphie. Train, train...how did that song of hers go?  
  
Mucho credit to Fire Rules for beta-ing the first part of this, the evil technicals...and for being inhumanly nitpicky, all to my benefit. Thanks a million, Timmeh! Oaky? :D You're the best, mon.  
  
More to come soon (Well, as soon as I can write it, anyway...) 


	14. A Little Calm

When I first awoke, I did not realize that Tidus was no longer beside me. It was the sort of half-sleep you have waking dreams in; you remember them, can think about them, but don't particularly realize you're not sleeping anymore. My head was nestled comfortably into the pillow and the blankets were snug around me; moving from my spot didn't even occur to me as an option.

  


So I lay there, half-waking, letting my mind wander. This was a rare, peaceful moment; all was quiet. There were so few of these chances to simply relax. But after a few minutes I did finally reach out for Tidus, and to my mild confusion found nothing.

  


"Tidus?" I called lightly, not bothering to open my eyes.

  


"Oh, you're awake. Morning," he answered happily from somewhere across the room, to my relief. "Did you sleep alright?"

  


"Mmhmm. You?" I turned over to face where my ears told me he was and stretched lightly.

  


I yawned, opening my eyes to see him grinning fondly at me. "Yeah." he nodded. "It's nice watching you sleep, Yuna."

  


I nestled into my blankets, assuming a near-fetal position with an amused smile. "What, do I snore?"

  


"Nah. But you can tell when you're having a good dream."

  


"Oh, how's that? I don't remember having a particular dream last night. I think I was too busy sleeping,"

  


Tidus chuckled. "Well, you curl up all of a sudden, kinda like you are now. And you sigh all slow, sorta, with this little smile on your face."

  


"Well, it's unintentional..." I stretched again once and sat up, reaching out my hand to him.

  


"Hey, I don't mind." He took my hand, pulling me up and into his arms, to his credit almost effortlessly. I slipped my arms about his waist and pressed my cheek against his shoulder, happy to feel the heat of him.

  


"You smell good." I commented, which made him laugh lightly.

  


"I do, huh?"

  


"Yes. Tidus..."

  


"Hmm?"

  


"I'm very happy..."

  


I felt him plant a soft kiss on my forehead. "I'm glad. You're going to get your dress today, right?"

  


"Yes..."

  


"I'll pay. Make sure it's super expensive."

  


That made me laugh. The thought was silly - choosing a wedding dress solely because of its high price tag? "What for?"

  


"Oh, I dunno. Get whatever you want. Get one made just for you, I don't care. Er, as long as making the dress doesn't take a year and a half..."

  


"Oh, no, a fine wedding dress only takes about six months..." I replied nonchalantly, until I realized he'd been kidding. Then I laughed. "Or maybe I should just take a look at what they already have, hm?"

  


"Nah. Do whatever you want. I'm just impatient," he smiled. "and a whiner. I'll wait, but not without complaining about it. I don't really mind...that much, anyway."

  


"But you'd rather have it as soon as possible, I know."

  


"If only we had a drive-through chapel and an Elvis impersonator, we'd be all set..." He smirked, to my utter confusion.

  


"Huh? Who's...Elvis?"

  


That made him laugh, though I didn't realize what was so funny. "Nobody. Sorry, I'll tell you about that some other time. We have to get you a ring, too...do you want to do that today?"

  


"Well...if there's time. We don't *need* an engagement ring you know...you don't have to spend all this Gil -"

  


"You, milady, are nuts." He smiled and kissed me lightly. "Of course you do. I wouldn't cheat you out of having a ring to show off. Besides, any wandering reporters seeing the shiny thing on Maestress Yuna's finger will just eat it right up. And we need a wedding ring, too."

  


"I wish we didn't have to worry about them..." We. All of a sudden, that's what it was. And it just happened without thought - had happened for a good portion of the conversation. We. Not I, not he - both of us, acting together, not as two, but one. It was wonderful.

  


"Yeah, I know. Me too. They're annoying, even as few as they are. But they're there, and they love you." At that, Tidus' lips curved up in a smile. "Don't worry, though. I'll protect you. Spira's paparazzi mob isn't half what Zanarkand's was."

  


"You're still my guardian, then? Even now?"

  


He frowned, his mockingly guardian-like look of concern and his almost fatherly tone just barely masked his laughter. "Of course, Yuna. Just because Sin's gone doesn't mean you're safe from other dangers, like fiends, or reporters, or shoopufs -"

  


"Oh, hush, you." I laughed and kissed him lightly once. "Stop picking on me! You make it sound like I'm defenseless!"

  


"Yeah, I know you're not. But you're cute when you get miffed like that. Didn't mean to actually bother you," he chuckled sheepishly. 

  


"You didn't. And I can take care of myself, thank you!"

  


"Aww." Tidus drooped, and I stifled a giggle. "You're no fun."

  


"But you can stay close to me anyway. Alright?"

  


He laughed quietly. "Got it."

  


I thought then about what had seemingly changed overnight between us. There had never been more than a blurb or two of lighthearted play during the pilgrimage, especially between Tidus and me. But now, in this little lull, playful banter came as an easy and welcome excuse to spend that many more seconds close to each other before having to start the day. And there was a flutter of kisses, freely and happily given by both of us; I still found myself unsure whether such shows of affection were something I forbidded myself during my pilgrimage, or if there was just plain not enough time. Probably both. But however important it was, it wasn't our immediate concern. Perhaps it was just that we were settling in to a semi-normal life...together. Whatever it was that made us that much more relaxed and happy together, it was magnificent.

  


"Well...we should get going, shouldn't we? We have a lot to do today." I said quietly.

  


"Yeah, I guess." Tidus shrugged, and the way he was still favoring his injured shoulder caught my attention.

  


"Tidus...let me fix that." I placed my hand on his shoulder, light enough so it wouldn't hurt. "Please."

  


"It'll be fine in a day or two anyway, y'know. It wasn't a bad pull at all. But you can if you want."

  


"I'll feel better if I know it's all healed up. If a fiend came along..."

  


Tidus chuckled. "You forget that one of Lulu's *dolls* could kick a Mi'ihen fiend and it would die. I could cast Hastega on the party and the backwash from the spell could knock out the fiends. Kimahri could roar at them and they'd all roll over dead. Rikku could -"

  


"Alright, alright, I get it!" I grinned. "Just let me be a squabbling, overprotective *woman* for once. It's not fair that you can fend for yourself." I laughed.

  


"Yes, ma'am."

  


I healed his shoulder swiftly - he was right. The injury had, for the most part, healed itself since I'd gotten my first glimpse of it.

  


"Heyyy..." He rolled his shoulders smoothly, looking delighted. "Works like magic!"

  


"Gee, Tidus, I wonder why."

  


He grinned and kissed my cheek, muttering into my ear. "Thank you, magician."

  


"The *term,* dear Tidus, is *summoner,* thank you very much." I scoffed hotly, making him chuckle.

  


"Alright, alright. Wizardess."

  


"Oh, come on..."

  


"Enchantress?"

  


I had to laugh at the thought. "Hardly."

  


"Sorceress."

  


"Tidus, you know better," I scolded playfully.

  


"Fiance."

  


I felt a smile creep onto my face. "That's better..."

  


"Mm..." His breath was soft against my ear, and he sounded amused. "Wife?"

  


"I like that a lot, actually...but you're a bit early in calling me that, not to mention you're in the wrong category altogether." I pinched his side lightly and he grinned, shrugging.

  


"Well, it was worth a shot."

  


"Come on. I'm hungry. Let's go get some breakfast, and we'll just see how many passes and shots you can make at me with Lulu looming over you," I chirped jovially, delighted to see him look playfully horrified.

  


"You're mean this morning," he chortled, rubbing the back of his neck.

  


"Oh, I am not."

  


"You are too."

  


"Hm...well...sorry." I had to raise up onto my toes to do it, but I kissed him softly in apology, happy to feel him smile.

  


"It's absolutely fine." he grinned when I pulled away. "Think nothing of it."

  


"Can we go eat now?"

  


"Definitely." 

  


  


***

  


Breakfast was uneventful, and Tidus, I was amused to see, behaved himself perfectly. After the meal, I rounded up the women and kissed Tidus goodbye; it would be a morning without him.

  


The air was cool and crisp, holding a slight morning fog and whiffs of ocean salt. It was early, but not too early - the dressmaker's shop that I had in mind would be open.

  


"You really know where you're going, huh, Yunie?" Rikku joked at my fast pace.

  


"Yes...Lulu, you'll find this a bit of a surprise, too. Here, down this way." I spotted a familiar street leading off the main commercial road. I had only been to Meema's shop once, when I was a child, but I could never forget the way there. Meema had taken me on somewhat of a vacation to Luca to get me fitted for a proper dress when I was accepted into the temple as a summoner-in-training; she'd led a younger me, hand sticky with a delightfully tasty lollipop, through busy streets, telling me a wonderfully funny fairy tale about a shoopuf as we went. I remembered it all perfectly.

  


"Here." I turned down another, smaller street, the smooth concrete of the road giving way to cobblestone. "Lulu, does the name Meema ring a bell?"

  


"*Meema!* She's *here?*"

  


I nodded. "She took me here once when I was little. That's how I remember. If there's anyone that's going to make my dress, I want it to be her."

  


I stopped in front of the shop I was sure was hers - not a large one, just a tiny little two-room store, large enough to take measurements and sew and change outfits.

  


"I haven't seen Meema in ages," I smiled to Lulu. "Haven't you missed her, too?"

  


"Yes," Lulu's eyes twinkled in amusement. "But don't you think we should do something more than sit outside her shop and reminisce?"

  


I nodded, chuckling. "You're right. Come on!"

  


Upon opening the door and stepping into the shop, my senses were instantly bombarded with memories. The shop had always smelled like cinnamon - not the manufactured cinnamon but the cinnamon of the earth, a good, hearty smell. That had not changed. I remembered sitting in her lap at the shop's single window, a beautiful oriole, and curling against her happily as she spread open a large, illustrated storybook and read to me. I remember...I always wanted the same story over and over, and she never said 'no, not again' like I thought she would. It was a story about Lady Yunalesca and Lord Zaon. Short; I could likely still recite it word for word.

  


Meema wasn't anywhere in sight, but I heard her voice from the back of the shop. "I'll be right with you!"

"Oh, that's fine..." I grinned to myself. "Take your time!"

  


I heard an 'urk' of effort - undoubtedly Meema getting up. The poor woman had long suffered from aches and pains, even when I was a child. "Bah, nonsense. These old bones just aren't what they used to..."

  


Her unnatural pause made me look up. And there Meema stood; short and skinny and frail but somehow not small, frizzy red hair tied back with a leather thong, dressed in a work apron, looking as if she'd just been sideswiped by a Macalania snowmobile. There was a smile there, though. I laughed.

  


"It's good to see you again, Meema." I smiled. 

  


"Well I never...oh, Yuna. Yuna." She covered her mouth with her knuckles, and I thought I saw the glimmer of tears in her eyes. Her voice cracked, just a little. "You've grown so much. And Lulu...oh, look at you two. You've grown up beautifully. It's been too long since I've seen you both."

  


She walked over somewhat stiffly, and embraced us both very tightly. "I'm so glad you came to see me. So tell me who your companions are, Yuna!"

  


"This is Rikku, my cousin..." I gestured to Rikku; she beamed and shook Meema's hand happily.

  


"Great to meetcha!" she chirped.

  


"...and this is Amia, my soon-to-be mother-in-law...you see, that raises the subject of why I'm here. I know we both never thought I'd be saying this, but...I'm here for a wedding dress."

  


Poor Meema looked like she was about to faint. "*Married!* Oh, Yuna, who?!"

  


"You haven't heard?" Rikku's nose crinkled up slightly. "Geez, I thought *everyone* had heard by last night, the way the people at the cafe were rambling on."

  


"I don't go out much."

  


I smiled and tried not to let my inner joy get the better of me. "Well...ahm...Tidus."

  


Meema frowned. "But...he's -"

  


"Not anymore!"

  


"What do you mean?"

  


"He's back!"

  


"And you didn't *bring* him here?!"

  


I laughed. "You're not supposed to let the groom see your dress!"

  


"I know, but still...! *Tidus!?"

  


Lulu chuckled. "It's not a very big surprise, Meema."

  


"Totally." Rikku agreed. "Those two are absolutely *googly-eyed* about each other!"

  


"Rikku...!" I blushed.

  


"Well you *are!*"

  


"Well it's a surprise to me," Meema mused. "I haven't seen either of you since I moved here. Oh! Where're my manners today? I'm glad to meet you both, Rikku, Amia. All of you, why don't you join me in the back while I get this little lady measured up?"

  


"Thank you," I bowed slightly. "I don't have that much time to dawdle and chat today, I'm afraid. My Uncle Cid is coming in the early afternoon to meet us before we head out to Guadosalam."

  


"Oh, that's a shame. Well then, we should get down to business, shouldn't we? If you'd like, you can look at some of the dresses I've already made and see if there are any you like. And you can tell me all about this fiance of yours!"

  


"Of course," I smiled.

  


***

  


"It's this one," I said decidedly. "Definitely this one."

  


"Really? Wonderful!" Meema called from outside the dressing room. "Come out and let us see it on you."

  


I took a deep breath, taking a last glance into the dressing room's mirror. The dress had appealed to me instantly, and I knew exactly what Lulu would say upon seeing it: 'It suits you.' 

  


And it did; it was unimposing, but demanding attention, yet modest, but absolutely lovely. The dress wasn't sleeveless like the last; I had hated that one, but I had not had much of a say at all in things. This dress was not overly fluffy, not overly shiny or gaudy; simply...simple. Perhaps like me.

  


"It's funny. I feel so *fancy.* It's strange."

  


I could hear all of them chuckling. "You're *supposed* to feel fancy, Yunie!" Rikku giggled.

  


"Oh, hush."

  


"Let us see it already, Yuna,"

  


"Alright, alright."

  


I stepped out of the dressing room, careful to keep the hem of the dress off the ground, and looked up at them nervously.

  


"Well...?"

  


Lulu had the strangest expression on her face. Rikku was grinning.

  


"Yuna...turn just a bit..."

  


"Uh? Oh." I did a full turn, looking back at them when I finished. "Well...I wish somebody would *say* something!"

  


Lulu's expression changed from unreadable to something like wistful. "You grew up way too fast, Yuna."

  


That made me laugh lightly. "That tells me plenty about my dress, Lulu!"

"Amazing. There. Now go back to being seven years old. Your getting married frightens me."

  


Rikku laughed along with me this time. "Lulu, come on! That's mean. At least give her some credit. You look gorgeous, Yunie."

  


"Indeed," Meema agreed, kissing my cheek."It suits you perfectly."

  


"I could have sworn Lulu would be the one to say that."

  


"Well Lulu's too busy wondering why you're all grown up all of a sudden." Meema smiled. "I'm having that trouble myself. But I've had daughters of my own, so I know how it is. You're beautiful, Yuna."

  


"Thank you all," I smiled gratefully. "I'm glad you like it."

  


"Do you want anything changed on it?" Meema asked, walking around me and inspecting the dress more closely. "Give me a day or so, and I can fix up whatever you need me to."

  


"No, it's all perfect."

  


"How soon will you be needing it?" she asked, eyes twinkling in amusement.

  


"I don't know. As soon as all the other preparations are finished with. I don't know what's going to happen at Guadosalam...and I don't know how long we'll be there. As soon as we have any kind of estimate as to when the wedding will be, I'll let you know. You've got to come, Meema...!"

  


"Lady Maestress, I wouldn't miss it for the world."

  


"Oh, don't call me that..."

  


"I'm just kidding you. So I'll keep the dress safe and clean, and you just tell me as soon as you want to prance down the aisle with that hunk of a man, ya?"

  


We all laughed. "I will. Meema...when all this is over with, when everything's taken care of, I promise I'll come back for a day or so to see you. We can talk more then."

  


"Oh, leaving so soon...?"

  


"I'm afraid so. There's plenty for us to do today."

  


"Hn. Alright. Go change, and we'll get you on your way."

  


That was Meema; not doting on one particular thing, always moving on. Always moving so easily. You could take a three-day trip to stay at her house for a month, and if once you arrived you decided that you felt like turning around and going right back, well, she'd just nod and wish you well. Meema was a woman who never asked questions; she always had been.

  


When I finished changing out of the dress and back into my normal attire, I handed it to Meema, gave her a tight hug and a kiss on the cheek, and paid her. To begin with, she refused money entirely; I simply picked up her purse, added the money for the dress to it (as well as a few extra Gil. I hadn't even seen the dress' price, but I thought that twenty thousand was suitable.) and put it back down. Meema clucked her tongue and shook her head in disapproval, even though she had not seen how much I'd given her; I told her I would not under any circumstances take the money back, and so she was forced to accept it. Inwardly, I mused that I'd pay another five thousand to see her reaction when she found out the amount I'd paid - but alas, there was no time for that. We said our reluctant goodbyes and parted.

  


The morning was already well underway; Meema's clock had read ten thirty just before we left. There was not much time until Cid came. Perhaps enough to take Tidus to look for rings, if he still wanted to. Like any woman I alloted myself the little vanity of wanting to have such a thing to show off. I knew, however, that it was certainly not necessary, and perhaps a little selfish to want such things *now,* at such a bad time. So if there was no time, then that was alright.

  


Amia was silent; she had been for a long time. I turned my head to her. "Is something wrong?"

  


She shook her head, meeting my gaze with a quirky smile and a chuckle. "No, not at all. Just remembering my own wedding. This makes me feel...*old*..."

  


The way she said it - as if it were something that brought a bad taste into her mouth - made me giggle. "You certainly don't *look* old. I'm surprised someone doesn't mistake you 

or my older sister or something. Or maybe a sister of Rikku's."

  


"Well thanks, but when you're over a thousand years old it does kind of get to you..."

  


All of us chuckled a bit. "How old are you really, Amia? Not counting the...layover, of sorts?"

  


"Twenty-eight."

  


I was not the only one whose face froze for a moment with pure and complete surprise.

  


I found myself very grateful that Amia didn't know Lulu well enough to read her expressions. Lulu's face was like stone - however, her eyes told a different story. I knew what she was thinking. Twenty eight years. How short a life - even for Spira. She was indeed young enough to actually *be* an older sibling of one of ours. That means she would have borne Tidus less than two years after her twentieth birthday; if I remembered what Tidus had told me about Zanarkand correctly, then she had finished her education not five years earlier; her life had just barely *begun.* Lulu's expression was all pity, all pain of empathy. She knew what it was like. She and Chappu had planned a life together years before Chappu even got the notion to join the Crusaders. And to have all that cut short...

  


It had long since begun to sink in that second chances often meant much more than it at first seemed. Amia confirmed it; she had more or less been resurrected to be with Jecht, but that also meant she got another chance at living her life. 

  


Perhaps for the first time...

  


"Jeez..." Rikku muttered. "You *are* old enough to be our sister!"

  


"I still bet I've got seniority on each one of you," Amia laughed cheerfully.

  


"Yes, you do," Lulu nodded. "Both Rikku and Yuna are younger than I, and I'm only twenty-four. You're the oldest."

  


Amia grinned and began to say something, but was cut off by a familiar call. I saw her face just light up at the voice; it was, of course, Jecht. He was sitting on one of the benches surrounding the great monument in the square, comically stuffing his face with some sandwich or another. It was amusing to see him so loose and casual; all that we'd glimpsed of him during the pilgrimage had been the grim face of a stern, dark man. But now...

  


Amia sped up her pace, walking over to him and promptly flopping down on his lap. Mouth full, he protested in incoherent grumbles, but she did not move - only laughed and kissed his cheek.

  


"You're heavy." Jecht complained after swallowing, obviously kidding. "Get offa me, woman!"

  


His wife shook her head, stifling another chuckle.

  


"What, isn't a man allowed to eat his lunch in peace around here?"

  


As if in answer Amia pointedly took a chunk off the end of his sandwich, popped it in her mouth, and grinned at him. 

  


It was obvious Jecht didn't mind - but just for show, he sighed and shook his head.

  


"Women," he grumbled in mock exasperation.

  


"Don't you dare start your 'women' rant around me, mister," his wife warned good-naturedly. She flashed a smile. "or I'll start my rant about *you.*"

  


"Eegh. You, Mi, are a cruel, cruel person." Jecht chuckled, hand fitting easily on her waist. "Glad to see you're back okay. Did Yuna find something she liked?"

  


As they fell into conversation, I couldn't help but watch them, fascinated. It was something about them both - I didn't have a word for it. How easily they talked together, Amia only stopping to poke fun at Jecht or pick a piece off his sandwich. They both looked quite content, which was slightly surprising, for I had never seen Jecht look anywhere near content before his return. Or the way Jecht held her, kept her where she was with an arm around her waist, and neither of them noticed a bit. Each little movement was taken for granted but then again not, because they were so wrapped up in each other it looked as if they would not have been disturbed by a stampede of shoopufs rampaging through the city.

  


"Yuna, you're staring." Lulu's voice was near my ear, and that shattered my focus on the couple. I blushed.

  


"Ah...sorry, I didn't mean to..."

  


"Be glad they're both too twitterpated to notice," Lulu laughed quietly. "It's nice to watch them though, isn't it?"

  


"Yes...oh...where's Rikku?"

  


"She ran off. Looking for Wakka, no doubt."

  


"I should go find Tidus..."

  


"Don't dawdle, Yuna. It won't be very long until Cid comes."

  


"I know..." I answered, heading for the inn. "I won't."

  


Once I got there, I witnessed one of the most humorous sights of my life thus far.

  


Kimahri and Tidus sat utterly silent at the same table, both deep in concentration. Between them lay a chess board, with a half-completed game set up.

  


Kimahri, who had the black chess pieces, was winning by a landslide.

  


I had to bite my knuckle to keep from bursting out in laughter as I watched from the doorway, unseen.

  


Kimahri reached over and moved one piece. Then he sat back, folded his arms, and rumbled one word.

  


"Checkmate."

  


Tidus leaned back too, swearing under his breath. "Yeah, you got me. You're good."

  


"I never took you for a chess player, Tidus," I mused, stifling a mirthful chuckle as I joined them.

  


"Yeah, I know. I never got real into it though. But damn...Kimahri's good at this."

  


My feline guardian smirked to himself. "Kimahri is Ronso. Ronso have good mind."

  


"Oh, so what are people, chopped liver?" Tidus laughed.

  


"Liver good whole, fried. Waste much by chopping."

  


"Wow, I think that was a joke...."

  


"It is true."

  


"I've never tried it. I'm...not much of a liver person I guess." Tidus explained, obviously attempting to make some sort of excuse. "So Yuna, did you find a dress?"

  


I nodded. "Yes."

  


Tidus excused himself from the table and got up. Together, we walked back outside. "So, how long do you think it'll take to make it?"

  


"Oh, it's already made. There's a lady named Meema that works as a seamstress here...she used to live in Besaid, though, and she babysat me when I was little. So I sought her out. That's what took so long, because we spent a lot of time talking. I promised her I'd come see her when all this is over with. The dress is already paid for, and so she's going to keep it safe with her until the wedding."

  


Tidus grinned. "Excellent. So...how soon?"

  


"As soon as the rest of the preparations are made! There's the cake, and the ceremony, and the issue of who's going to *perform* the ceremony, and let's not forget that you, sir, are wearing a tuxedo..."

  


He feigned disappointment. "And here I was hoping that I'd be able to go through my own wedding in my blitz uniform. ...Uh? Hey..." his voice dropped low suddenly, and his hand gestured to something behind me. "Look..."

  


I turned around. There stood Wakka, Rikku being held close enough in his arms to suggest more than a friendly hug. I couldn't understand what Rikku was saying, but from her smirk, I took it she was teasing him about something. 

  


I cast a sideways grin at Tidus. "I *knew* those two were up to something!"

  


"Shh..." he grinned back. "let's see."

  


Rikku apparently finished her statement, looking smug. Wakka laughed, held her tighter, spoke; he must have said something sweet, for she stopped mid-grin. She crinkled her nose up and apparently said something to contradict whatever it was he said, because she was promptly and ruthlessly bearhugged. I stifled a laugh as I watched her squirm and try in vain to get him to let her go by kicking his shins. After a moment he did release her. Face flushed with laughter, he shook a finger at her in mock admonishment, obviously hiding a grin of his own.

  


"I wish I could hear what they were saying..." I muttered.

  


Wakka started to say something and then stopped, chuckling. His hand slid once more to her waist, scolding her forgotten, and then spoke briefly.

  


And then he bent and kissed her.

  


"Oh, I knew it!" I chirped to Tidus, beaming. "I knew it!"

  


Rikku didn't protest by any means; didn't even seem surprised. She seemed happy, above all else – she was kissing him back eagerly, a sweet smile present on her face. And she was casual enough about it that I was sure it wasn't by any means the first time.

  


It only lasted a few moments, though; he released Rikku, and by the look of her, she could have sprouted wings and fluttered off into the sky.

  


"How sweet..." I commented.

  


"You know, you could have *told* us you had a thing for each other..." Tidus called loudly, catching their attention. Wakka looked embarrassed; Rikku stuck her tongue out at Tidus.

  


"And you could have refrained from acting like a spy, you big meanie!" Rikku countered.

  


Tidus laughed and shrugged innocently. "Not my fault,"

  


"Hey," Wakka called, pointing behind Tidus. "Cid's comin', ya?"

  


Both Tidus and I turned to look, to see Cid's airship indeed coming closer on the horizon. Tidus smiled at me, stole a quick kiss, and then took my hand.

  


"Come on, let's go get my parents. Can't leave *them* behind."

  


"Is that sarcasm, Tidus?"

  


"Nah. Really, we can't. Bahamut says so. He's already at the meeting point."

  


"I see...well then, let's go!"

  


Tidus nodded. "Alright. But before I forget..."

  


"Hn?"

  


He dug around in his pocket for a moment, pulling out a small case of a shape any self-respecting woman would recognize.

  


Tidus looked kind of embarrassed, opening it and taking out the ring, showing it to me. Sapphire blue; blue like the sea, like his eyes that had me so entranced from the very beginning. "I figured we could get the actual wedding rings later...call it a guilt trip, but I just wanted you to have someth-"

  


I cut him off, leaning up and kissing him happily. "Hush. It's beautiful."

  


He nodded mutely, looking grateful as he took my hand and fitted it on. Perfect. It was an unfamilar sensation; I had never been one to wear much jewelry. But not unpleasant. And silly as it sounded, I still wanted to go scramble after everyone else to show it off. I knew I would.

  


"*Now* we can go." Tidus smiled.

  


"Alright, but..."

  


"Hmm?"

  


"Exactly what do you mean, 'before I forget?' Is it really that easy to forget about something like that?" My voice was deliberately squabbly, and I put my hands on my hips, mocking Lulu's pickiness. Tidus laughed.

  


"No, but..."

  


"No buts, mister! You're coming with me!"

  


"Yes, ma'am."

  


We shared a grin, and with that, left to go find Jecht and Amia.

  


  


_________

  


Well there you have it, folks. Chapter 14. Guess what? I can save in HTML now without doing a day's worth of Geocities formatting per chapter! :D I found this AWESOME freeware word-processing program (My computer didn't come with anything more than Notepad and Wordpad. Puh.) called OpenOffice...It's just as cool as Word...yay! Hehe. Be happy for me. =D More to come soon, mucho Wakka/Rikku fluff in the next chapter......


	15. Reconsideration

Rikku had grown up well-nurtured by her family. When Cid was away, it was just her with her brothers and sisters. They got along peacefully - they had rarely if ever shown her the unkindnesses she saw Yevonite children show their own siblings. There was no place for such bickering in Home. However prosperous it might have been at any given time, there was always, always a need for teamwork. And when fights or arguments severe enough to disturb the flow of things *did* break out, her father or her brothers were always there to quell it and firmly scold all the participants. Rikku's older siblings, instead of giving her a disdainful rebuke when she said or did something offending or stupid, simply kept her at their side and gave her a long, drawling, torturous lecture about whatever came to mind. Usually it was just random tidbits of advice. This was how she learned from her brothers Keyakku and Brother how to thieve things away from Bikanel fiends; how she learned the inner workings of machina. And from her sisters, she was taught patience, perseverance and woman-ness, as well as a wariness of men that, over time, became no less than instinctive.

  


It was not feminism or chauvinism or anything that led Hebe, her twin Ranna, and Zuo to teach her such things. Just simply...circumstance. The oldest, Hebe - nicknamed Heeb, much to her annoyance - was the best example of everything they taught her. Their teachings were simple, and often not teachings at all. During her youth they did not speak of such things directly to her, but let her stay in the same room while they gossiped together about their various experiences with those evil beings called men. So she listened, and accepted whatever they said as truth. For how could unmarried Hebe, who by youthful foolishness had borne a half-Yevonite daughter of her own, be wrong when she said that men - especially those of Yevon - were nothing more than fiends?

  


This was why Rikku was afraid.

  


_Hajan mad ouin kiynt tufh, hud ajah vun y susahd, _Zuo would advise her.

  


Rikku felt that she had to be missing something, overlooking something; she saw nothing but geniune kindness and affection in Wakka, and that frightened her more than it would have if had he been a serpent of a man. No man was without his vices - and those unseen and undetected by women were far more dangerous than the vices that were obvious.

  


_Tuh'd pa y cemmo ouihk fusyh mega Heeb fyc,_ Ranna would tell her, grinning. No, no, must never be like Hebe. She had honestly believed that that Yevonite man cared for her. Defended him with tooth and nail against Cid, who gave her full warning of what to expect. And when Hebe realized that her precious lover cared for her only enough to leave her pregnant, and unwed no less - oh, this was a legend among her sisters - Cid, setting aside any 'I told you so' precepts, sought out the offending man and gave him a beating he would not soon forget. He nearly killed the boy. Who knew -- maybe he did. Rikku did not remember hearing anything of him after that. Either way...oh, no, she must never be like Hebe. Trusting....vulnerable. Vulnerability was a woman's worst enemy.

  


_Frydajan oui tu, Rikku, hajan dnicd dra funt uv y Yevonite syh. Drao mea mega chygac._

  


__The words of her eldest sister Hebe rang more insistently in her mind than anyone else's. Rikku was doing exactly what she had been taught not to do. Putting her trust in a Yevonite man...oh, what her sisters would say to that. Much less falling in...('_Wait,' _Rikku thought,_ 'don't go there.'_)...well...much less caring for one the way she did!

  


And yet she knew that there was nothing but good intentions in Wakka. And 'Yevonite' would not even apply to him - to most everyone, in fact. But still...the fact remained: she had gotten herself into a position where she knew she could easily be manipulated, lied to. 

  


She would have to explain this relationship to her father. And her father was a very difficult man to persuade. Cid was not unfair -- he could accept Yevonites ('_Ex-Yevonites?'_ Rikku pondered.) as comrades and friends in a heartbeat, but to court his daughter...? Cid was a hot-headed man; he would likely not consider that his own sister had loved a non-Al Bhed...and look at all the good *that* brought.

  


Even then. If she hadn't been Al Bhed, or if he *had* been...over the course of the pilgrimage, Wakka had turned twenty-four. Rikku had turned seventeen. She knew that there was much to be desired in the seven years between them - Cid would not much approve of *that,* difference, either. Rikku knew well the gaps that lay between her and Wakka.

  


But oh, how she had her heart set on that goofy smile of his. Even when she knew better. 

  


That was her stubborn way - a bit of the _fusyhedo_ in her, as Hebe had explained to her once, laughing. Women, as a rule, were stubborn. It was their divine right to be such.

  


Snapping halfway out of her thoughts, she registered Wakka, still close to her - one broad hand holding her by the waist. Never confining, though; simply containing. She could run if she liked.

  


Rikku looked up to see a strange expression on his face. She realized that exercising that right of stubbornness might be necessary, and something she couldn't put her finger on sank in her. It was near impossible to refuse him. That made her feel strange.

  


"...You alright, Rikku?"

  


"Um. Yeah, I'm fine,"

  


A smile crept across Wakka's lips that seemed more uncertain and embarrassed than anything. "Well, seein' as you were grinning just a second ago and you're not now, and seein' as you look kinda unhappy right now, I'm thinking that something's wrong, ya?...Is it something I did?"

  


Rikku shook her head, trying to look convincing. "Nah. I just...well, we should go meet up with my dad now...so let's go!"

  


She cursed herself silently for sounding so fake. Regardless, she moved past him and headed towards Mi'ihen, where Cid would be landing the airship. Wakka let her go - she didn't hear him follow. She was not sure whether she was disappointed or relieved.

  


None of this would have normally bothered her in the slightest, but her own feelings had awakened it. For when he'd broken off the kiss, she had smiled, and without even thinking almost blurted out her doom. She'd caught herself, thank the heavens - but the words still ached to be said, waiting on her lips like dewdrops that have not yet gathered enough mass to fall.

  


  


'_E muja...'_

  


  


_Cred._

  


  


She cursed herself in every tongue she knew. Foolish, stupid...falling head over heels for a boy! Hah! She had a billion better things to do...

  


Something tugged unhappily at her heart as she tried to convince herself of that. 

  


It would have been so easy to say it...it just felt so natural to say such a thing at such a moment. And he would have been happy.

  


_But it would still have been wrong..._

  


_Wouldn't it?_

  


***

  


She greeted Cid in her usual manner, throwing her arms around him and half-suffocating the old man. Rikku mused silently that she'd indeed learned a few things from Yuna.

  


_Smile..._

  


Once Rikku saw Yuna approaching, Tidus inevitably following only a few feet behind, she excused herself to the airship to let them have their reunions in peace. Yuna'd want her time to properly explain things. So Rikku stopped by the bridge of the airship to see her big brother.

  


He was there, as always, sitting in the pilot's seat and munching on a pastry. She came up beside him and tugged at his mohawk, laughing when his surprised greeting resulted in crumbs flying in several directions.

  


"Rao, pnu," she smiled. "Oui'na cmubbo yc ymfyoc, E caa!"

  


He grunted, swallowed. "Cruja ed, cra-veaht. Ruf ryja oui paah?"

  


"Ugyo. E drehg E's kuhhy ku dyga y meddma hyb uhla fa kad uh dra nuyt, druikr. E gehty vaam faent."

  


He turned his head and quirked a brow at her. "Yna oui celg?"

  


"Hu...E kiacc E's zicd uid uv ed dutyo." Rikku lied, distracted with the sight of the path to Mi'ihen below. Jecht and Amia had already joined Tidus and Yuna. Wakka, Lulu, Kimahri, and Bahamut were all still approaching the ship.

  


Bahamut turned his head and seemed to say something. She saw Wakka make a gesture and speak.

  


Bahamut laughed.

  


"Fryd'c fnuhk, cecdan?"

  


"E dumt oui, hudrehk..."

  


"Oui ryja dra muug uv y mujacelg cyht-funs."

  


Rikku scowled at him. "Kaa, dryhgc. E ghuf E lyh ymfyoc luihd uh oui du syga sa vaam payidevim, pek pnudran."

  


He only chuckled. "Oac, E luhcdyhdmo luhlanh socamv fedr dra cdyda uv so pypo cecdan'c jyhedo. Naymmo, Rikku, fryd'c fnuhk? Ed'c fneddah ymm ujan ouin vyla."

  


"E tuh'd fyhhy dymg ypuid ed nekrd huf..."

  


"Cdippunh cra-veaht...famm, ymnekrd. Pa dryd fyo, drah.

  


"Ugyo, E femm."

  


The bridge door raised, and Cid entered. "Yuna and Tidus told me about their little plight. To hell with the chocobos, we're taking you guys there by airship!"

  


He called the order to Brother, who stuffed the last bite and a half into his mouth and grunted agreement as he fired up the ship. 

  


"E ciakk E's kuhhy ku dyga dryd hyb huf...pa lynavim, femm oui? Tuh'd lnycr dra yencreb." Rikku leaned forward and informed Brother, who gave her a playful sneer. 

  


So she left to go think by herself, and sulk...

  


And maybe, just maybe, cry a little.

  


  


***

  


  


Once everyone had been loaded up and Brother had gotten the airship on a steady course, he turned his attention to Cid.

  


"Vydran, dyga luhdnum uv dra yencreb vun y susahd, bmayca."

  


Upon seeing Cid nod, Brother got up and approached Wakka.

  


"What, you need somethin', brudda?"

  


Brother grabbed Wakka's shoulder firmly and dragged him out of the bridge.

  


Wakka, taken totally by surprise, hardly even fought as he was shoved roughly into the wall of the airship.

  


"Ow! Hey, what's your problem!?"

  


Brother scowled deeply, fingers digging into Wakka's shoulder like nails. "Fryd tet oui du tu so meddma cecdan, oui jema veaht!?"

  


"Eh? Uh, I can't under--"

  


"Fryd ryja oui tuha du Rikku?!"

  


"Rikku? What about Rikku? Oww, will you *stop* that already?"

  


"E tuh'd ghuf fryd oui tet du Rikku, pid oui cina yc ramm paddan ku syga ed nekrd!" Brother demanded, releasing his grip on Wakka to thrust his finger in the direction of the airship's cabins.

  


"Is Rikku over there? What's wrong with her?"

  


The tall Al Bhed man glowered down at his notably smaller captive, firmly gesturing once more towards the cabin corridor. "*Ku!*"

  


"Argh...do you want me to go see Rikku or something?"

  


Brother spat something that Wakka took to be an Al Bhed expletive, then grabbed the redhead and shoved him in the general direction of the next corridor. "Ku, veaht!"

  


"I guess that's a yes..."

  


Rolling his shoulder and wincing at the soreness left by Brother's grip of steel, he started searching for Rikku. The Al Bhed watched him like a hawk as he went; Wakka could feel green eyes burning a hole in his back. But he paid it no mind.

  


It didn't take him long to find her; she was in one of the more comfortable cabins. Curtained windows, soft sheets, machina light on the ceiling above her. He knew enough about machina now to know that the wall-switch powering it was in the off position. The day was young, and she didn't need false light.

  


So he stopped in the doorway, not daring to go further without her permission. She was sitting on a bed, lost deep in thought. The expression on her face in the moment before she saw him told of something like sadness. Wakka couldn't imagine a reason why. 

  


Other than him, somehow. And he was afraid of what he did not know he had done wrong.

  


***

  


Wakka didn't move. He simply stood in the doorway rubbing the back of his neck and staring at the floor. Rikku supposed he was trying to figure out what to say.

  


_Never seen him like that..._

  


__"You could at least tell me what's wrong, ya?"

  


She could see he was trying to hide an underlying dejectedness - despite herself, she just wanted to run up and hug the man. Despite the fact that, to her realized halfway-fear, there was something like tension between them. "...It's not you, I promise."

  


"Well, it's gotta be, 'cause unless there's thunder, I don't think I've ever seen you bolt like that..."

  


Guilt once again claimed her. "Well...it's not your fault. Okay?"

  


"So it's got somethin' to do with me, but it's not my fault. Got it. C'mon, Rikku...you can at least tell me what it was that I _didn't_ do in any case, ya?"

  


Rikku sighed and leaned against the wall, drawing her legs up close to her chest. "It's...I don't know...wrong...?"

  


She watched as something in Wakka drew inward, solidified, as something in his empathetic expression hardened almost imperceptibly, as the beginnings of an emotional wall could be viewed in his eyes. It was so subtle that she was sure anyone who wasn't looking closely enough would have missed it. It made her feel awful. "Like how? I don't see anythin' wrong..."

  


Rikku's thoughts were frantic. He wouldn't understand unless she told him everything - and how to do it without boring him, making it sound like she was pulling lame excuses out of her head...or worse, hurting him...? "Well...it's my father - he'd _kill_ me!...And then what Ranna and Zuo taught me, and Hebe, with her little Duunu...I can't stand how everyone looks at that girl like she's a fiend!...And her father, that Yevonite boy Daddy beat the living _lnyb _out of, and then...then..." She met Wakka's eyes, not bothering to hide her tone of pleading. "And then there's you...but it's not anything you've done, it's just me, because I'm being a scared, juvenile little _meanie_ right now and I can't help it, can't help that I..." she trailed off, not daring to finish her sentence. Saying things like that aloud made them irreversible. And she didn't know what kind of damage that might do...

  


The wall cracked; not much, but Rikku saw that Wakka realized she wasn't out to simply shove him away. She was grateful. Wakka smiled halfway. "Rikku, I have absolutely no idea what you're talking about...but if you're that worried about it, whatever it is, just _tell me_, ya? I'm not gonna bite your head off or anything. You know me better than that, hn?"

  


Rikku looked down and nodded. She listened; heard him sigh, heard his footsteps as he approached her and seated himself heavily beside her. He touched her arm once, and then let his hand rest on the sheet of the bed on which they sat. Reassuring.

  


So she took a deep breath, exhaling the child in her. And she told Wakka all that she was afraid of. About Hebe and Duunu, and her father, and anything and everything that did, or ever might, stand between them.

  


Once she'd finished, she chanced a look up at Wakka. His face held a thoughtful expression - she stayed silent, giving him time.

  


"You've given this a bit of thought, haven't you," he said finally, hand coming up to brush her cheek lightly. She held it there, nodding. "Well, you're right."

  


Of all the things she'd expected him to say, that was the one not on the list. "Huh?"

  


"I said you're right. About all that stuff, I mean. But...we might as well give it a shot, ya? To hell with them. And if it doesn't work out, well then, we gave it our best try, an' there's nothing more that coulda been done. Right?"

  


Rikku was silent for a few moments, but slipped her slender hand into his own, watching how his broad palm dwarfed hers. And yet he was always so gentle, especially with her...

  


"Right...."

  


He smiled, chuckling. "What's wrong now?"

  


"Oh! Nothing...it's just that I didn't actually expect you to say that...it's just that even if everything's hunky dory, my father..."

  


"He knows me, right?"

  


"I guess..."

  


"Hey, I'm not gonna go puttin' my hands where they don't belong. You oughta know that by now, ya? And Cid'll figure it out soon enough."

  


"But he'd slaughter you if you *breathed* wrong!"

  


Wakka grinned. "You want me to go straighten things out with him?"

  


"You wouldn't *live!*" she exclaimed with wide eyes, making him laugh.

  


"I think you're overestimating his temper a bit, ya?

  


"Ohh, you don't know Daddy when he gets mad..."

  


"Well, why would he get mad? There's no reason to, right?"

  


"I told you already. What happened to Hebe...he knows that we all know better, you know? I don't know how he'd take it..."

  


Wakka rubbed his neck. "Y'know, I don't think he'd mind *that* much. Not everybody's like Duunu's pops, ya? And personally, I don't blame Cid for what he did. 'ey, I'd have done the same thing. Y'gotta admit, though, it was at least partly Hebe's fault..."

  


"Yeah, Daddy said the same thing...but right after that he said that there's no excuse for abandoning a woman. Then he left to go pound the guy."

  


Wakka laughed quietly, bowing his head. "I agree. So...why don't you just come straight out about it with Cid? I'll help...well...as long as he's not armed, I mean."

  


Rikku giggled, and the laughter was tinged with a tone of anxiety. "You big wuss!"

  


"Hey! Lookit *you,* ya?!"

  


They both laughed then, all tension gone.

  


And she was still smiling when he kissed her.

  


***

  


"Oh, there you guys are." Tidus waved to the couple as they entered the bridge. With Jecht, Amia and Bahamut added to the usual head count, it seemed unusually crowded. "We're almost at Guadosalam."

  


Wakka nodded. "Okay. Does Bahamut have a plan?"

  


It was Bahamut himself who answered. "Yes. It is uncertain, but it is our best chance."

  


"So, what is it?"

  


"Sit down," the fayth said smoothly. "and I'll tell you. This may take some time."

  


  


  


  


  


  


  


  


  


  


___________________

  


  


Ahh, Wakka...I've always imagined him to be more of the gentle giant sort, especially towards Rikku. I know they both might seem a little OOC, but I tried to portray the more mature, adult side of them in this chapter. Rikku's grown up a little bit, ya?

  


Anyhoo, sorry about the delay, beloved readers. ^_^::: After being struck with a lightning bolt of inspiration labeled "FFVIII Squinoa one-shot" (/shameless plug), I finally sat my butt down and wrote this out. Again, sorry it took so long, but I've just kind of been in a funk lately.

  


I know not all the people who read this dig Japanese music, but for those of you who do, this chapter's recommendation is 'Emu~For my Dear,' which is by Gackt, bless his pretty bishounen soul...it's funny, too, that I should rediscover this particular song at this particular time, when I'm busy hauling off half of Laban's VGM FTP...The lyrics fits this chapter quite well, might I say...you can find a translation with both romanized lyrics and their english translation (plus some explanations of the lyrics) here: . So if you've got a penchant for music you can't understand without help, give it a download! ^_~ The first time I heard it, without lyrics or even a romanization, the sweetness of the song nearly brought happy-tears to my eyes. It's so lovely. "Wasurenai kara......" Another good one by Gackt is "Rain," off the album MOON. Just so you know. :D

  


I'm also gonna try to incorporate more Wakka/Rikku from now on...I'm sorry to make you Rikku/Wakka fans wait so long for a decent chunk of fluff. ^_^; Hehe, when I started planning this chapter I was reminded of a review I got in the very beginning, waaay back in the day...it asked me not to make Wakka/Rikku 'just the background couple.' Seeing as this story is mainly about Tidus and Yuna, and making Wakka/Rikku a secondary couple was inevitable, I kind of brushed it off. But now that there *is* time to develop their relationship more, I'm gonna try to do so. ^_^ Okay? 'Cause they deserve it! Right? (Sorry, Noelle. Hehe.)

  


I'm gonna TRY to get another chapter out before my birthday...(Heee! It's September 4th, for those of you who want to know. ^_~ I'll be 15! Good golly, I'm almost over the hill! :D Heck, I'm almost as old as the old fart himself! *Hands a wheelchair to Timmeh* ^_^;; Hehe. Couldn't help that one. Sorry, Timster.

  


Oh, and just for the record, I AM avoiding changing this story's rating to R (Which with the language and the themes probably should have been done a couple chapters ago...) so that it shows up on the default G - PG-13 ratings....Just so you know. ^_~ I'll probably change it to R once it's finished.


	16. Inhibitions

Wakka sat compliantly on the only surface available for sitting: the metal floor. Rikku trailed close at his side, silently noting the rigid tension in her brother's posture. He was silent, which wasn't unusual, but he was never tense. Something had happened, and she'd missed it...

"It is fairly simple." Bahamut began, turning to face Jecht. "You. You will act as a lure."

"Told you I'd be bait," he grumbled to Amia. She was silent, but her hand found his arm, and her expression changed minutely. Tidus knew the expression all too well. Smothered pain. She was good at hiding pain.

But those who looked for it could still find it written clear as day in her eyes.

Why the hell does he have to keep pouring salt on those old wounds...?

"Yu Yevon will be attracted most because to him, mainly because he had claimed him once in the past. He will likely feel that his former host is weakened, and can be easily reclaimed. Which is likely true."

Tidus exhaled a long, tense sigh. "Okay, so Dad'll lure him. Where to? And what happens when he lures Yu Yevon close?"

Bahamut paused just a moment too long.

"You...don't know, do you." Amia's voice was dangerously soft. That was the voice that Tidus had feared during his childhood; one wrong step, one wrong breath and you would be swiftly obliterated. The Beyond-pissed PMS Rampage Extraordinaire Mark XVII, Jecht called it. Tidus remembered that his father had caught it a few times, as well.

"It is all speculation."

Tidus saw Jecht wince in anticipation. Amia jerked up immediately, eyes ablaze.

"That's bullshit! What, you think you can just prance in here with the first idea that comes to mind and throw him out onto the line without one goddamn idea as to what he should do once he gets face-to-face with that...that stupid bubble?!"

Bahamut's eyes remained ever-calm. "Do you have a plan of your own? Or may I finish?"

She stood there, towering over him, quivering in protective rage. Jecht touched her back lightly - that was enough. With a final glare that threatened death, she sat back down.

"I cannot say for sure what will happen once Yu Yevon is lured close. Our best guess would be to have our mages keep up a steady flow of Holy..."

"Whoa, hold on." Tidus cut in fiercely, realization hitting him. "You don't know how to kill him."

"Pyreflies are not invincible. There's simply just no known way to eliminate them."

"So what the hell're we doing this for?" Jecht demanded.

"Because we must do *something!*"

Lulu's expression deepened as she crossed her arms. Her tone surprised Tidus; he had not heard her speak so gently before. 

"...Yu Yevon can still possess a living body. At that point, if he were to take control of a body....I think it would be possible to constantly feed a spell such as Holy to the body for such a long period that not only would it kill the individual, but...it would also keep the pyreflies trapped in the spell's field for so long that there's no way they could live."

"Perhaps that would work. One...cannot be sure of the effect that spells have on pyreflies however..."

The biting cold in Lulu's voice returned; it was almost welcome to Tidus, for a sentimental Lulu was somewhat disturbing.

"If it would work, the question would still remain. Who among us would be the one to die?"

There was a long, bitter silence in the room as everyone absorbed that question. After several uncomfortable moments, Yuna was the one to tentatively break it.

"It wouldn't need to be...any of us, in particular, would it...?" Yuna cut in. Tidus lay a hand on her shoulder, keeping carefully quiet.

"Perhaps not. But anyone here would certainly be a host of interest. Yu Yevon may well ignore a normal man...a host such as that is useless. He would seek someone powerful."

Tidus felt Yuna sigh, shiver slightly, and then shake her head. There was something about her in that moment that made it seem like they were all back on their pilgrimage. Something about her demeanor just sort of...saddened. She was always so melancholy, but hid it so well. Yuna was trying to hide it again - but alas, she seemed to have lost her touch a bit. "No, no...we can't do this..."

"We're painfully short on alternatives right now, Maestress."

"It's too much like history repeating itself, choosing a loved one as the Final Summoning, and I refuse...I refuse to." Something in her voice was shaky -- Tidus' arm slipped around her waist in silent consolation. Yuna leaned into the embrace almost invisibly, not daring to look at him. He didn't mind; he'd try to help all he could, but she had to deal with her ghosts on her own. There was little Tidus could do about that. "There was a way around that. There must be another way here, there must."

"Well if there is, nobody's seein' it, ya?"

In a startling display of activity, Kimahri grunted, eyes turning to lock onto Bahamut. "Fayth child tell what keeps pyrefly alive."

"...Nothing, really. They essentially don't *need* anything to survive. Not food, not drink. You cannot drown a pyrefly; they do not require air. It's simply their medium."

"Essentially?"

Tidus scratched the back of his head. "Well...pyreflies can die...but it's always more or less by their own choice..."

"Hmm?" Yuna turned her gaze to him, confused. "How do you...? ....Oh...well...what do you mean, by their own choice?"

"Do you remember...I told you that we never die...well, it's true most of the time. Pyreflies can die...but only once they become at peace, which only a few ever do. It's...sort of like choosing to hit the self-destruct button..."

Yuna just looked disturbed. "That's...terrible!"

"Yeah, well, how do you think we're gonna get our favorite pyrefly to decide that he's cool with everything? I betcha he's an angstful little guy..." piped Rikku.

"Can't exactly give him group therapy though, can we?" Jecht clipped, unamused.

"I do not think that persuading Yu Yevon to surrender his life is a possible course of action."

"Fa yna rana. ...We are...here." Brother called from the pilot's seat, his Spiran choppy and heavily accented. The distant whirring of engines had begun to soften; Brother silenced himself yet again, focusing on the landing. He had gotten quite good at it - Tidus hardly felt more than a very slight lurch when the airship touched down.

A group of Guados were already waiting at the foot of the airship's ramp when Yuna stepped down, the rest of her guardians following closely, and Jecht and Amia trailing last. Nav Guado was the first to approach her - they bowed, shook hands, and exchanged small talk and words of greeting. She patiently introduced Tidus, Jecht, Amia and Bahamut, pointedly overlooking the actual explanation of why they were present. Tidus had to admit that she had the nobility down pat -- she never once faltered in her aristocratic act. He stayed close at her side, silent, watching her move and learning by observation what he should do. Aristocracy and fame were two different things; both, he could tell, required an equal amount of patience. But fame was so...casual. This -- this was stiff and tense and I-hope-all-is-well-with-you-and-by-the-way-did-you-have-a-smooth-journey? and oh-yes,-certainly,-thank-you-very-much-and-I-hope-my-presence-is-not-an-inconvenience. He didn't care for it at all, but it would have to be dealt with.

She explained to them that she would do her best to attend to the situation at the Farplane. At that, Nav seemed shocked.

"You know about it...? We were planning to ask your aid when you came, but how did you know beforehand, Lady Yuna?"

Yuna shook her head. "That is not important. I do not want anyone else involved. I regret it, but I must attend to this matter before we can commence our discussions..."

Nav bowed slightly. "Of course, Lady Yuna. We are ever grateful for your assistance. All of Guadosalam's services are at your command, Maestress."

"Thank you."

"Shall we escort you to the Farplane, Lady Yuna?"

"No, thank you. I appreciate the gesture, but it is unnecessary. Erh...I do ask that you go and make sure no one is present when we arrive..."

Nav, again, looked puzzled. "Maestress...at present, no one would dare go near the Farplane if we paid them."

Yuna exchanged a worried look with Tidus. "Is...? No, I'm sorry, never mind...Bahamut?" In response, the small fayth stepped smoothly up to Yuna's side, face deliberately wiped blank. That frightened her more than anything. If it was bad enough that he had to adopt his expressionless façade...well, he obviously realized something that she didn't. That frightened her too.

How ironic that your face says most when you mean it to say least, child...

"Let's go."

And so they did; the small cluster of Yuna's guardians had turned into a veritable swarm, but no one paid mind any longer.

Funny, Yuna thought, that I was the last summoner. And now that Sin is gone, the customs and precepts that summoners are expected to obey are virtually nonexistent. 

No one spoke as they approached the Farplane, but Yuna mused that the tension in the air could have been sliced with a knife. Bahamut's motions were stiff, controlled; Tidus' hand clenched hers with an almost uncomfortably firm grip.

Yuna and her party had just reached the entry to the cavern when the fayth stopped abruptly, body instantly stiff as steel. She bent her head to look at him, frowning.

"Bahamut...?"

His eyes were wide; his voice, shockingly meek, startlingly small. Like a plea, servant to master. She didn't understand him; what he uttered was in the language of Zanarkand. And as quickly as he froze, he barked another unintelligible phrase - almost certainly an expletive - and bolted forward, up the long stairway to the Farplane.

Jecht in turn swore and ran after him. Tidus moved to do the same, but Yuna grabbed his arm swiftly. "What's wrong? What'd he say?"

There was a strangely disturbing, but not unfamiliar, expression on Tidus' face. "...It's not good. Hurry! Let's go!"

And so Yuna let him go, following a few paces behind.

She bounded upwards a few steps, then turned back to look at Amia, who was trailing behind her. "You ought to go back. Wait in the inn; the Guado will welcome you."

"Are you nuts, girl? What do you want me to do, sit in a bedroom and pace and worry like some obsessive housewife while Jecht goes off and gets hurt? I don't think so!"

Yuna found herself growing inexplicably short of patience. "You can't do anything, Amia! Go back. You'll be safe." And as if in afterthought, "Please."

"Where Jecht goes, I go. Period."

Amia said it harshly enough to almost annoy Yuna. But after a moment of thought, she decided to let it go, and so turned silently to continue the path upward.

When Yuna reached the top of the stairs, she was glad that Tidus took her and held her firmly against his side, for she did not know if she could have stood on her own. Everyone was silent with utter shock; even Bahamut, whose back was turned to the Farplane's entrance. He looked right through the group of her guardians.

He said nothing, but his expression said everything.

We're...

Too late?

How...?

How could we be too late...

She wanted to run to the child, embrace him, wipe off those tears of helpless rage on his face; even if he fought her, he would not be alone as he cried, for she knew she would end up weeping alongside him. But then she wanted to grab Tidus' hand and run, take them all away from this place, for Yuna had far too much to lose.

The Farplane was completely devoid of life.

Or death.

Completely. The usual shine and flow of the mass of pyreflies that were resident in the Farplane was entirely gone. Nothing moved. It was dead. As dead as death could be.

Save for him, of course.

And Yuna could see the monster that had caused it all, see his swollen spirit-body drifting in the open air of the Farplane, taunting her. Taunting them all.

Mocking her, because despite all she had lost to him, she was not done losing yet.

Bahamut was trembling now. Numbly, she did advance forward to him, kneeling down and resting her hands on his arms.

"Bahamut..."

"We're too late." He said simply, helplessly. As if he had already lost.

"I know."

"You're shaking."

"You as well."

He said nothing. 

Afraid of his silence, Yuna asked, "So what happens now?"

"We wait."

"For what?"

Bahamut lowered his head, and spoke the words that Yuna least wanted to hear. 

"For Sin."

"Can't we...do anything?"

"Not anymore."

"So..."

"There has to be something you can do."

Yuna kept her eyes off of Tidus, for the tone in his voice was dangerous. Frightening. 

Threatening in a way she'd never even heard from him before.

"I can poison him. Curse him. It will not stop him; it will only buy us time. A month. Maybe two."

"Then do it."

"Isn't there anything more you can do, Bahamut? I'm sure we can find another way, if we have enough time..." Yuna found herself almost begging. 

"The poison will slow his transformation into Sin. Once he dons his physical body, there is little I can do."

"But you're an aeon!" Tidus demanded angrily.

For the first time, Bahamut's eyes met Tidus'. "There is nothing I can do to permanently harm him while he's in this form. You would all die of mere exhaustion if you attempted to bring him down with spells now. I can do nothing. You all can do nothing. I cannot summon my aeon form, contrary to what you seem to assume - Yuna is no longer my host. An aeon cannot be summoned if its fayth is without a host."

"Then join with me again! I never minded it, Bahamut..."

"If I could have, I would not have given you a choice, Maestress."

"So what's the excuse now?" snapped Yuna's lover. Wincing inwardly, she turned her head slightly to him.

"Tidus..."

Her voice was soft, and her eyes met his for only a scant moment, but it said enough. Tidus paused, giving the child a dark glare, and almost refused her plea. But then she sighed, long and slow, softly enough so he didn't even hear it but saw it instead, and he came to realize that she too was bearing the brunt of his anger. He could have throttled the child Bahamut without a second thought -- but hurting Yuna? 

Unthinkable. Yet somehow he was. 

Tidus crossed his arms and, reluctantly, held his tongue.

"The excuse," Bahamut said softly, "is that I am no longer an aeon at all. That you assumed otherwise is not my fault."

"Hey, wait a minute..."

Yuna nodded. "I should have known. I sent you. As an aeon, I mean. Of course you wouldn't be able to become an aeon. That Bahamut is dead, in a sense, yes?"

"Yes. The beast Bahamut and the child Bahamut were inhabited by separate pyreflies. And beasts, save those fiends who were once human, do not reside in the Farplane. They are given immediate release from Spira. So...all that is left is...this."

"So exactly what're we gonna do? Leave a curse hanging over his head and hope we're all still alive by morning?"

"We can no longer do anything besides that. I can slow him down, but not stop him. To stop him, we'll simply have to wait until he takes on a physical form. There is a scant period of time when, summoning the energies needed to create a physical self, the pyrefly and its body-in-the-making are one - it is, perhaps, the only time a pyrefly is actually vulnerable."

"And what if we misjudge the time and he's already throwing this town or that city into chaos?"

"If we miss this chance, then it will have to be done the way that Lady Yuna did it once before. The hard way. Find Sin, kill him. And then we'll simply have to try to get the timing right the next time around."

"It's not like we can sit here for the next six months in paranoia..."

"I understand. I do not require food, drink, or rest - I shall stay and watch. And I will do what I can to slow him down along the way. When it looks as if the time draws near, I will go and tell you."

"Bahamut...."

"Maestress, before you protest, do not forget that this purpose is the sole reason I am here. My life is devoted to this cause. You surely have not forgotten your days as a summoner. You understand."

Silently, thoughtfully, Yuna nodded. "...Yes, I do...it's just, silly as it may sound, I still would like everyone to be happy. To be able to have a reason to smile...and -"

"Maestress."

"Hn?" The tone in his voice was strange to her; directed inward, contemplative.

"You overlook what I am, Lady Yuna. A fayth. We exist to bring peace. And nothing in this world would make us smile more than helping to achieve such a goal."

"That's remarkably valiant of you...but...you've been granted a life for the first time in a millenium, and..."

"And you do not wish me to waste such a thing?"

"I suppose that's the way you could say it," Yuna bowed her head.

"Again, Lady Yuna. This life is hardly being wasted. I am not so selfish as to think that my life matters over everyone else's. And aside from that -- again, this is my duty. A fayth lives to hope. To work, relentlessly, towards the Eternal Calm. We almost have it, Lady Yuna! Almost!" Bahamut was enthusiastic once more, eyes bright with possibility. "You cannot ask us to stop now. That - not denying me the normal existence you are all predestined to have, but that - would be cruelty. We're so close, Yuna. It'll take a little longer than we thought, but we can finish this. For good. There is nothing in existence that would make me so happy. We...we all want to stop this...stop dreaming. All of us. Desperately. We've had more than enough."

Yuna nodded in agreement, slowly, silently, never meeting the fayth's eyes; just absorbing what he had said. "That is...your path, then,"

"Yes. And he," said Bahamut of Tidus, with no particular enthusiasm, "is yours."

She smiled, if just for a moment. "I understand...I just...I need to be alone right now. I...need to think about all of this...we're several days ahead of schedule. I'm sure the Guado will not mind us occupying their inn for that time..."

Lulu understood that as a dismissal, and spoke first. "...Alright. ...You know where to find us, Yuna."

"Thank you," replied the Grand Maestress softly.

"Bahamut?" Lulu called. Wordlessly, he followed. So Yuna listened to their footsteps as they left, and when they were gone, stood up slowly.

She'd known Tidus would stay. And that, she didn't mind. She listened to his soft advance, comforted when his hands came to rest their warmth on her shoulders, and his breath was in her hair. Yuna leaned her back against his chest, sighing deeply.

"...That kid is nothing but trouble." Tidus murmured, and eked a short laugh out of her. "Yuna..."

She turned to face him. He frowned at what he saw, raising a hand to gently wipe away the streaks of moisture on her cheeks. She exhaled shakily in response, and to Tidus' mild surprise, promptly embraced him in something close to a deathgrip.

"Yuna?" He embraced her in return, a slightly perplexed look on his face. Yuna was trembling. She kept her forehead pressed against his shoulder, though, and her arms firmly around his waist.

"I'm...just so glad," Yuna answered, her voice unstable, "that you're here with me now."

Tidus stroked her hair, not quite understanding what she meant. She seemed to gather that, and after a moment, raised her head. "Look at it, Tidus...look at how empty it is."

With a horrified sense of comprehension, he came to realize what she meant.

If Bahamut had waited just a few more days....

If he had waited just that much longer, it could have been him, could have been his own spirit devoured by the abomination that loomed in the distance. He knew she was grieving for all the lives already lost - she knew that each pyrefly was once a life, vibrant in itself. But he also knew that out of all the lives subject to this fate, he was the one dearest to her, and if he had not escaped it...

No wonder she'd been so kind to Bahamut. He couldn't have foreseen how quickly Yevon would consume his fellows, but he had, indeed, spared Tidus' life, and at just the right time.

He enveloped her then in a deathgrip of his own, and he was not sure if the sound she made was a laugh or a sob. "Yuna..."

She did manage a soft chuckle that time, albeit a small one. "Can't you say anything else?"

"Yuna." he smirked.

"Oh, come on."

Tidus touched her cheek, stroking its soft skin with his thumb, eyes not once leaving hers. "I love you."

Yuna smiled, reaching up to kiss him softly. "Much better. Tidus...what's going to happen now? I mean...what're we going to do?"

"Well...we'll have a month or two, I think. At the least. I know you've got your treaties to seal and peace to secure and all that, but whether you like it or not, we're getting married."

Yuna laughed lightly, still sniffling a little. "Okay. And then?"

Tidus stepped back and threw a few punches at the air. "Then we'll kick that jerk Yu Yevon into last year!" He stopped, turned to the Farplane's entrance, and shook his fist. "Y'hear that, punk?! Your days are numbered!"

Yuna giggled, and Tidus found it contagious; he lowered his hand and laughed as well, pulling her close against him with one arm. "See, Yuna? Got you smiling again."

"You always do,"

"Yeah, it's my job!"

"So I see," mused Yuna. "And you do it very well."

"That's good."

"Now all you have to work on is being a little nicer to Bahamut."

Tidus sighed, sheepishly rubbing the back of his neck. "Heh. Guess I owe him one, huh?"

Yuna nodded. "We both do. We all do, really. It may not seem like it, but he's giving up a lot. I'm sure he'd like to live out a normal life. In fact I bet he'd love it. Do you notice how little he complains, for being such a little boy?"

"I still say he's an old guy in kid's clothing."

"Oh, Tidus...come on."

"Well he is! He's got a thousand years' experience behind him. You can't call somebody like that a kid."

"You can't call him an adult, either, Tidus..."

"Well...maybe you're right there."

"All I'm asking is that you give him a little credit. He's helping us. And without him, you wouldn't be here...so I owe him for that. I owe him a great deal..."

"Yeah, good point."

"You owe him an apology as well, Tidus,"

"What? Oh, come on, he has this total vendetta against me! Did you see the way he looked at me? And you want me to apologize?"

"Tidus...you weren't exactly friendly either, you know."

Tidus feigned a sigh and shook his head. "Fine, fine. But I'm only doing it for you..."

"I figured that," Yuna mused, kissing him lightly. "Thank you."

He smiled. "I'm gonna head down and get something to eat. I'm starved. Do you want to come, or d'you want to stay here and think some more?"

Looking away, she sighed, thinking for a moment. "I suppose I'll come with you...the view is a little depressing from here."

"Hm, you're right." Tidus' expression hardened slightly at that. "It'll be alright, Yuna. I promise. It'll all turn out just fine."

She sighed again, nodding. "We can only hope."

"Yuna, if hoping was all you did on your pilgrimage, then there must've been somebody who was awfully pleased with you up there, with all the miracles you got through."

Yuna smiled, if only a little. "Well then. We can do our best, too. Just like Wakka taught us."

"Wakka? Come on. Look at what that motto did for his team."

"It worked for us..."

"Yeah, that's right. Just don't count on it in blitz, though. Heh. Yuna, I promise it'll be alright. We'll make it alright. So don't worry like that..."

"I'm not worried!"

Tidus chuckled, giving her a teasing kiss. "You're not worried, but you're a liar." He stroked her hair. "Don't worry. I promised once, and I'll promise again, a million times. Always. Remember?"

She did smile then, a true smile that lit up her face in that rare, beautiful manner. "No, I completely forgot, Tidus. Why would I bother to remember such a perfect vow?"

He laughed. "Because you're mocking me, that's why!"

Tidus seized her swiftly and ruthlessly tickled her until she shrieked for mercy, laughing too hard to see past the delighted tears in her eyes. 

He released her from his grasp only to have her lean right back into his arms, burying her last dying giggles into his shoulder. Tidus chuckled at her happiness, planting a kiss on her shoulder. "Now can we go? I'm still hungry."

"Okay." 

With an exaggerated elegance that Yuna took as a mockery of the standards of her stature, he bowed and offered her his arm. Chuckling, she swatted at his elbow and took his hand, instead. He made a show of practically waltzing her back towards the Farplane's entrance, and Yuna merely laughed, not bothering to protest. He was in such moods as these only rarely.

They ate in amiable silence, and it was Tidus who forced the money for the food upon the flustered waiter. Yuna remarked that everyone she met tried to give her things for free. Normality was precious to her, and he knew it -- that was why he forced the money upon their waiter with a pointed glare. He didn't think Yuna had seen, and was grateful. 

After lunch, they went to see the leader of the Guado. Yuna explained to Nav the plan that they had come up with, and she was pleased to see he was all too eager to help. Everyone was. It eased her unsettled heart, just a little.

Maybe...

Maybe this is the Eternal Calm, after all...maybe it doesn't have to be a perfect peacetime, like I thought. Troubles are bound to come along.

Yet maybe it's this, simply this -- setting aside fading lines of discrimination to reach out and help someone. Working together for a single goal - being able to give a smile of kinship to those who were once enemies. We're bridging the great trenches that we built between ourselves and others bit by bit...and if we can meet in the middle of that bridge and embrace as brothers, I've found all that I seek for Spira. And I know I'm not alone when I work towards a golden age for this world...

Maybe that's the Eternal Calm.

The Guado were kind enough to let her go on her way after that. They understood - this was difficult on her. So although the three remaining Guado youths found a way to approach her and speak to her without being noticed by their elders, she found that she could relax, just a little. And she found the children - Idd, Zasa, and Yiu - no less than delightful. Fondly, she remembered Adanna, her personal favorite of the Besaid children, and wondered how the young girl was doing.

For once in her life, Yuna had nothing to do. She ended up retiring to her room to take a short but surprisingly much-needed catnap. To her pleasant surprise she woke to find Tidus relaxing beside her, absorbed in some book or another. She smiled - he hadn't joined her in napping, had only gone off to find the others. But it was always wonderful to find him there next to her when she woke.

"How long did I sleep?"

He turned his head to her and stroked her cheek once in greeting. "Hey...you slept for a couple hours. You were out cold,"

"Really? What time is it?"

"Eh, I figure about eight or something."

A small, amused smile crossed her lips. "I missed dinner."

At that, Tidus chuckled. "You're still hungry after all that food?"

"A little."

"Hm, you must've slept it off."

"Maybe. What're you reading?"

"Just a little travelers' guide they had. It's about the Thunder Plains." he grinned. "Some of the advice they give is pathetic."

"Mm? Like what?" Yuna queried, sitting up and moving to his side.

"'Take care in crossing the Thunder Plains, for both the road and the great towers that reside there attract lightning. Keep moving at all times, and make sure to beware of the vicious Qactuar...'? This must've been written before the Qactuars were sealed...but Qactuars, vicious? Jeez. They're harmless. I just thought there were a lot of them back then..."

"They're not harmless, just outmatched. The poor things don't live long enough to do damage around you," Yuna reminded him smugly, poking his ribcage.

"Well, you're right, there...since you're so busy whacking them to pieces before I can!"

"Tidus, you know very well that's a flat-out lie." giggled Yuna. "I can zap almost anything into next week, but I can't whack them senseless. You and Auron were always best at that."

"You've gotten a lot better, y'know."

"Hardly! Besides, how can you expect me to hurt anything with something as weak as a stick?"

Tidus laughed, closing the book and setting it on the nightstand. "Well just wave it around a couple times and everything within a mile suffers Overkill...I tell you, that Holy is some deadly magic."

"That's because I'm a summoner!"

"You were a summoner..."

She considered that. "Yes, and now what am I?"

His blue eyes locked with hers, holding a sincerity that she found a little surprising. "A fantastic leader. Not to mention a wonderful woman...and...one I love more than life,"

In the back of her mind she noticed that he was blushing just the slightest bit, even as she slid her slender fingers around his neck to pull him close for a tender kiss. The most wonderful butterflies danced in her - he wasn't usually so straightforward, but oh, was it lovely when he was.

Their kiss was disappointingly brief - Tidus was the one to stop it, grinning at her in a patentedly mischevious manner.

"What're you up to this time?" asked Yuna, and he laughed.

"Here, get up." Tidus stood up and helped her up as well, taking her hand and heading for the door.

"Huh? Where're we going?"

Tidus turned his head to look back at her, the most delighted smile on his face. "You'll see! It's a surprise. Just come with me."

Yuna nodded, silently wondering what on earth he had planned.

As he led her out of Guadosalam and onto the dark Djose road, lit only by the starry sky above, she knew. She realized exactly where he was taking her, and the butterflies danced all over again.

Then, once we beat Sin, we're coming back...

__________________

Anyone remember *that* quote? ^_~

Announcement: 

It's my birthday! Well...it'll be my birthday on the 4th. ^_^;; I'ma be fifteen! Wheeee. I feel...old.

Another Announcement: 

In preparation for an upcoming (really big) fanfiction contest in November, I'm going to be focusing all my efforts on DCT. That means more chapters, and sooner - but unfortunately, I have to force myself to ignore my other fics. So no updates for them. But you DCT readers don't mind that much, do you? ^_~

Let me take a moment to be a FF.net traitor, as well. There's another fanfiction site out there that I've become involved with (*FF.net, with the crestfallen expression of a newly replaced lover, sobs and runs out of the room* XD ) called MediaMiner.org. Naturally, the address is . =B It's got a decent fanfiction section, but it's just not as widely known as FF.net. And the forum people are really helpful too~! Just, in the introduction forums...beware of the newbie initiators. XD They're quite adamant in their initiations. It's all in fun, though. So if you get smacked with a big-screen TV or an iron sink, don't take it to heart!

^_^ Hehe, the next couple of chapters ought to be really fun...

They may take awhile, though. The next two are going to be very one-shotty...mucho descriptive and stuff. I hope you'll look forward to reading them as much as I'm lookin' forward to writing them ^_^

Jeez. I can't wait to finish DCT. (Then I can start editing my earlier chapters! Ugh, they're horrible!)

A quick music note (no pun intended): I don't know if I mentioned it last chapter, but Song of Mana from Legend of Mana is so the theme for the Rikku/Wakka pairing. :D Random note. Hehe. Lyrics available here. 

I can safely say I'm at about the halfway point, if not past it.....

More to come soon. ^_~

Yet Another Announcement: 

Yuna/Tidus lovers rejoice! The next few chapters will be all Yunis, all the time! :D Whoohoo! And major Yunis fluff in the next chapter. D This one's been in the planning for a long time...*Cackle* In fact, as it stands right now (though it may change...) the next chapter will be *all* Yunis fluff. Rejoice! Celebrate! Party like it's...er...o-O What year is it in Spira?


	17. Salaam

Pre-chapter A/N: I know, I know, this chapter's awful and it's going to need serious revision because Shad-deh has some nas-teh writer's block. Be merciful. And don't kill me for what happens later in the chapter. X_o;;

"Salaam is Arabic for "peace," or, more to Shad's liking - and pardon the almost indefinitely horrible spelling - it comes from "asalaamu alaykum," meaning "peace be unto you" or "god give you peace" or the like. Anyone ever realize that when they heard the name "Guadosalam"? ^_~ Maybe it doesn't have anything to do with it at all, but I noticed. Leave it to me to remember an obscure lesson from seventh-grade history.

Oh yeah, and apologies to the Continuation judge, if he happens to read this...somehow I'm not sure if he was expecting a WAFFy romance. (If you gag, I'm not responsible...really...)

Once again, I repeat: This story will never have anything lemony in it. Saucy, yes. Implied, yes. But not outright lemony.

_____________

"Nav?"

The Guado leader primly turned his head to look at Lulu, who, with Kimahri, sat at his table, in his dining room. It wasn't an extravagant one; his predecessor Lord Jyscal had not been a very material person, and so Nav would not be either. Extremities between rulers were discouraged, even though Nav would have liked something larger. It would have made a better impression on the Maestress and her guardians, he thought; not that Yuna had taken the time to have a tour of his home. Given the circumstances, that was fine, but Nav did have an appreciation for standard formality.

"Yes?"

"Do you think it can be helped? Yevon, I mean."

"Certainly. It is in the Maestress' hands."

Lulu looked grim, or perhaps it was simply her annoyance. "You've promised us your aid. What can you do to help?"

"We'll surely think of something, with Bahamut and Yuna to help."

"Yuna doesn't seem to be taking it too well..."

"That's understandable. We'll help her in any way possible."

"You misunderstand me, Nav. I meant that I very much doubt Yuna could do it right now." Lulu 

shook her head. "It's all too much, and not just for her. She's level-headed and inhumanly patient, but not indefinitely so. Yuna needs time away from all this. I doubt she'll want to return unless Bahamut prompts her to -- he's staying, you know. You may have to come to her, instead of vice versa."

"I'm sure that won't be a problem. Everyone's eager to help; those that have seen her ask if she's well."

"Yuna will be fine. She simply needs awhile to settle herself in. She needs to get married, first; surely you've heard they're engaged by now."

Nav nodded, chuckling to himself. "It's a wonder they haven't gone off and gotten over with it already,"

"That's Yuna's doing. She's trying very hard to make everything look...much like a fairy tale, if you will. As correct and sweet and lovely as is humanly possible. Yuna's good at making people happy..."

"A fairy tale, huh?"

"Well, it's really not quite a fairy tale." Lulu grinned. "But very close."

"Yuna -- where is she? I haven't seen her for a good while."

"Oh...she's off sleeping, poor thing."

*****

Yuna was barefoot.

The path was cold beneath her feet, but it hardly fazed her. It was more refreshing than uncomfortable. She couldn't remember going about without her boots since she was a child. The clear, chilly night and Tidus' purpose distracted her from her worries; they lifted off her shoulders like the fading lights of Guadosalam, seeming to dull, or at least become a bit less palpable. She was grateful.

"What are you thinking?" he asked.

She smiled to herself. "Good things."

"Well that's really exact,"

Yuna laughed quietly. "I remember taking this road with Kimahri when I was little...it was really warm. Summer. So humid I practically had to pant to breathe. But Kimahri told me that if I was good and didn't complain, I'd get a great surprise when we reached the river. I was so incredibly gullible when I was a kid, you know that?"

Tidus scratched the back of his head. "I'm guilty, too..."

"Well, when we did get there, it was the middle of the night and I was half asleep. I'd been riding on his shoulders all day, and I remember being really cranky..." she grinned. "I demanded that I be put down...Kimahri put a No Encounters ring on me, set me down, and went to sleep. The first thing I did was run down to the water and try to catch a pyrefly...when I realized I couldn't, I sat on the shore and summoned up an image of my father. I stared at it all night; even tried talking to it. I really thought he could hear me. It was really...therapeutic. I only got a couple hours' sleep that night; when we got to the other side of the Moonflow the next afternoon, I went right to sleep and didn't wake up until the next day. But...it was wonderful. It really helped me deal with it."

"Too bad they couldn't talk..."

"Ah, I had a wonderful imagination. I remember...I didn't know quite everything about pyreflies. I just knew that as long as the pretty lights were around, I could see my father."

Tidus laughed. "Wanna know the weird thing? There were never any pyreflies in Zanarkand. None. I mean, I don't even remember seeing them once."

"Really?"

"Yeah...I guess because people just lived a really long time. Death wasn't very common..."

"How long?"

"Oh, lots of people lived to be about a hundred...not much longer than that, though."

"A hundred! How? They're practically immortal...!"

"I guess, but it wasn't a miracle or anything. You name a disease, they had a cure for it. A lot of people who would have died from this or that didn't, because doctors knew how to fix pretty much anything. I guess that's what brought about the population laws. See, there was one downside: you could live a million years if you wanted, but it's not like you were able to have a zillion kids. You're allowed one, and then any more than that requires some really hard to get permit or something...'course, the government's favorite people got to have as many kids as they pleased. It really sucked...I know my mom always wanted lots of kids."

Yuna frowned. "That's awful. So many people that they had to...is it possible to have that many people in one place?"

Tidus smiled. "Yeah...it gets a little crowded, though."

"I can imagine!"

He placed his hands behind his head, interlocking his fingers. "So, what're the laws like in Spira? I'm still learning..."

Yuna frowned again. "There are none, as far as size of families go." When she saw the look of surprise on Tidus' face, she laughed. "What did you expect?"

"At least some kinda regulation...what, are you telling me people have as many kids as they want here?"

"Well, yes...it's just that so many of them don't live to adulthood...or at least haven't in the past..."

Tidus smirked. "So how many can we expect, huh?"

"A-as many as you like..."

He raised an eyebrow, looking over at Yuna to see her blushing almost comically, hands interlocked in front of her, carefully not meeting his gaze. He laughed.

"I was just kidding, y'know."

Yuna's mouth formed a little grin. "Fiend,"

"Guilty as charged."

"...I'd want...a girl." said Yuna, a few moments later.

Tidus looked at her in mild surprise. Yuna's eyes were heavenward, and her thoughtful smile had returned.

"A girl...with your eyes, of course! Or maybe a boy, with your face...do you know what a 

gorgeous face you have?" Her smile had grown bright, rapt. Tidus had to laugh, pulling her close against his side.

"I think you're thinking a little far ahead..."

Yuna pouted, trying - but failing - to maintain a frown. "I think you're not thinking ahead far enough! Really, Tidus, hasn't anyone ever told you how beautiful you are?"

He looked playfully unamused. "Gee, thanks. I can always count on Yuna to make me feel manly."

She laughed in delight, reaching up and kissing him briefly. "You deserved that! And besides, it's true. You've got the most stunning eyes. Didn't any of the women in Zanarkand tell you that?"

"You can mention them without sounding jealous...? How disappointing,"

"Oh, I just hide it well." smiled Yuna, as innocently as she could manage. "But you're not answering me! Hasn't anyone brought this to your attention?"

"Nah."

She grinned. "Impossible; you're just being modest!"

Tidus shook his head. "Since when do women flatter men? You're being silly!" Yuna pouted again, and Tidus found the tiny motion something like addictive. He kissed her, grinning. "Besides, men aren't supposed to be pretty."

"Fine, then...you're a very handsome man, Tidus. Does your ego feel better?"

He chuckled, taking her hand and lifting it to kiss her knuckles. "A bit. Hey, we're close..."

Tidus was right. They had reached the Moonflow, and Yuna didn't seem to have taken any notice at all. The air above the water was heavily littered with pyreflies, all dancing their slow ballet of mindless twists and turns above the river.

She nodded in agreement. "There are...many of them. There are so many dead."

"Hey! I brought you out here to be happy. Smile."

"No fair," she declared. "You're using my own words against me!"

"All is fair and love and war," Tidus recited nonchalantly before seizing her and tickling her lightly, happy to see her squeak and struggle playfully to get away. "And I'm certainly not gonna pick a fight with you,"

Yuna wriggled in his grasp, laughing. "Let me go, you fiend! I'll..."

"What're you gonna do, huh?"

"Something so awful I haven't thought of it yet!" she yelped, squirming to try to avoid another barrage of tickles.

"I'm quivering in terror," Tidus laughed, and unable to bottle her amusement any longer, Yuna giggled as well. "because Yuna and her white magic are gonna come get me when I'm not looking! 'Run for your life, it's Cure!'"

"Or Holy," Yuna threatened, wiggling her fingers in a playfully malignant manner.

"Aw, c'mon. You wouldn't be that cruel. Nothing survives Holy!"

"So I'm not harmless, am I!"

"Well, who knows what havoc you could wreak with that terrifying Dispel of yours..."

"Oh, let me down already, you meanie! Before I --"

Tidus silenced her with a happy kiss, setting her down. "What was that?"

She laughed; touched her hand to his cheek. "Absolutely nothing."

*****

Amia stuck out her hand, raising her eyes - squinted against the unremitting downpour - to the grey sky.

"Feels nice,"

"Watch out for the thunder," Jecht advised, "or you'll end up a hamburger."

His wife grinned. "Know that from experience?"

"Nope. I know that from watching Auron figure it out from experience. He was squabbling over some stupid thing and I just turned and walked away from him...that's what you gotta do to the guy, you know? Anyway, he says somethin' else, can't remember quite what, and I turn back around and get ready to shut the guy up once and for all when this huge bolt of thunder just comes down and zaps him. Bam. Bullseye. It was hilarious. Even Braska was laughing."

Amia chuckled. "I hope he was alright."

"Oh, yeah. It's insane what that guy managed to live through. That was barely a scratch."

"Hmm..." She linked her arm through his, resting her chin on her husband's shoulder. "Miss him?"

"Eh, a bit. I kinda wish he was here to see all this. He's a hell of a fighter, y'know...he'd be able to help. But I guess it's alright."

"I'm sorry,"

Jecht brushed a lock of hair from her eyes and planted a light kiss on her forehead. "Nothin' to be sorry about, Mia. And if we stay here another moment or so we're both gonna get fried."

That made her smile. "Let's go inside, then. Besides, you'll catch cold if you stay out here in the pouring rain, wearing what you're wearing."

Jecht looked heavenward in supplication, rolling his eyes. "Women..."

--

"This place gives me the creeps, Jecht."

"Yeah, I know. It's always been full of bad vibes." He rubbed her shoulder. "Christ, you're freezing..."

"I'm not that cold. The rain's nice...and besides, it's warm in here."

"Yeah, well, the rain's also nice until you get pneumonia. Better to stay high and dry. Want some tea?"

"How about coffee?"

"They won't know the meaning of the word."

"Hmm...alright. Tea."

They took their drinks and retreated to the inn, retiring to a blanket-covered heap on the couch consisting of sleepy bodies and dry clothes.

"Where's Tidus?" Amia asked after they'd finished the beverages in relative silence.

"Don't know...and if you think I'm about to get up and go look for him, you've got another thing coming." Jecht yawned. "He's a big boy. He can babysit himself."

His wife smiled, closing her eyes. "Yuna seems very nice."

"Oh, yeah. There's not a bad bone in her body. Yuna's a sweetheart...it's a good match, I guess."

"He has good taste."

Jecht guffawed, grinning. "Well, he certainly didn't get that from you..."

"Hey!"

*****

His hands were splayed loosely on the curve of her hips: his breath, on her neck. It was distracting her. She kept thinking that she should fill the empty void of silence, start a conversation, but couldn't find the words no matter how she tried. She wanted to tell him about Isaaru and the pyreflies, but it might spoil the easy, relaxed mood of the moment: wanted to ask about plans for Yevon, plans for the wedding, plans for exactly what they were going to do when they left Guadosalam. But the mention of any would ruin the peacefulness. Even if her mind wouldn't stop churning out questions and worries, she could at least appreciate what Tidus was trying to give her.

"You're in thought again," she heard him comment, and instantly felt a pang of guilt.

"I'm sorry..."

"What's on your mind?"

Yuna leaned against him, sighing lightly. "Lots of things. What's going to happen...what we're 

going to do with this."

"You shouldn't worry so much," he advised gently, tone fading from slightly frustrated to empathetic. Yuna's answering smile was half sarcastic.

"Well, if I don't, who will?

"Everyone else."

"See! And that's not good..."

"But they worry anyway. So you'd be fine."

"You've got strange logic, Tidus," she mused in jest, closing her eyes. "I know I should relax. Or something. But...I can't take my eye off of where I want to be. Do you understand? I can't stop trying to think of a better way. A safer way. What if I miss something? What kind of Maestress would that make me? I'm sure the Guado are all terrified...well, what's left of them. This is yet another endangerment to them...and to us. And --"

"Yuna, your scrutiny wouldn't miss an ant's burp. There's only so much that can be done. Relax!"

She chuckled softly. "Don't know the meaning of the word."

He pressed a playful kiss to her neck. "You need a...distraction."

Yuna's smile grew into a grin. "You're too much of one already."

"Well, good! You need it. That's my job." Attentively, he gave her skin an affectionate nip.

"I'm just dying to see what else is on that job description of yours,"

"Oh, lots of things. Like kicking Yevon's ass into last year. And making Yuna lose sleep at night for one devious cause or another."

She laughed at that. "I get your point already. You're insistent, aren't you..."

Tidus kissed her jaw once, resting his cheek against the top of her head idly. "Only because I can be. Really, I don't mean anything by it."

"Sure you do. You'd be all the happier if I agreed."

"Hmph...well, I'd never insist on it. I'd never make you, if it makes you feel any better."

The smile that appeared on her lips then was one that Tidus hadn't seen before - a secret little smile, a smirk, almost conniving.

"Maybe," she began, and he thought he could hear laughter in her tone, "that's your problem right there."

Tidus was, for a moment, too surprised by her response to throw back a witty comment.

"I hope you know I was kidding," Yuna chuckled a moment later.

"No you weren't,"

"Didn't your father ever teach you never to give up?" she beamed, however enigmatically.

Tidus snatched her up into a tight embrace, grinning. "Yeah, and he taught me how to tell a summoner from a temptress, too - go figure!"

She laughed then, delighted with the knowledge that she could so easily provoke such a response from him. "Put me down...!"

"Not a chance."

*****

When they walked the path back to Guadosalam, both were far quieter than they had been approaching it. Nothing needed to be said - the mood between them was calmer, but the air snapped with an electricity of sorts that was altogether strange and wonderful to Yuna. He walked closer to her; made a point of touching her, brushing her more often: arm, or hip, or hand, or neck. It was a simple display of possession that sent the butterflies a-fluttering in her belly again, even if she was reading too far into it. And despite her outward naivety she knew precisely what she was doing and what she had chosen. And she welcomed it.

Guadosalam was asleep. The torches burned low, left lit only for the occasional passing traveler. The innkeeper dozed in his seat - Yuna and Tidus walked softly, not wishing to disturb anything. Kimahri lay curled up at the end of the corridor, apparently fast asleep as well. Human beds and Kimahri's claws didn't mix well - he most often ended up playing the part of sentry instead of sleepyhead. 

It felt to Yuna as if it had been rehearsed. Kimahri opened a single sleepy, slitted eye at the pair when they approached - Yuna pressed a finger to her lips, silencing any questions, and he closed his eye again; his opinion on the matter was anyone's guess.

She stepped with a strange sort of confidence into her chamber, turning and tugging on Tidus' hand when he was slow to follow.

"Yuna..." he began softly, once she'd closed the door.

She smiled and wrapped her arms loosely around his neck, reaching up to kiss him lightly. She knew the tone in his voice, and spared him the awkwardness of the 'you sure about this?' moment.

"Hush," she said happily, "or you'll wake Kimahri."

*****

Yuna watched him sleep.

Months of pilgrimaging had trained him well: he slept long and deeply, taking the chance while he had it. It was nice - she could curl up against his side (marveling at how warm and, excusing the expression, comfortable he was) and not worry about whether she would wake him. She mused that maybe she should follow his example, but there was something peaceful and pricelessly beautiful about the moment, and so she committed herself to just a few more moments of waking.

She didn't regret anything; after all, it had been entirely her decision. And maybe between all the dropped hints, blatant invitations and stolen glances, that was what Tidus had been waiting for. A little lovers' secret wouldn't hurt...and Yuna was firmly unwilling to let her relationship with him become a primarily public one. Albeit she wasn't expecting to have any sort of significant other at her side when she took power, she still wanted her privacy. What Tidus had done for her over the course of the evening had had the effect of Curaga on her frazzled morale, and she was grateful beyond words. But that was just between her and Tidus - the danger that people might pry or intrude unsettled her. Tidus had mentioned the possibility of stepping down - she wasn't sure if she wanted that, but in her heart of hearts she knew she was unhappy where she was. All the grandeur didn't suit her: she wanted to live as she had always lived, modestly, and none too easily at that. But the issue of a successor...

Amid all that she thought back to how happy he - and she, for that matter - had been at the shore of the Moonflow.

Take away all our burdens, and we're still just a couple of lovestruck teenagers. That's comforting. But I wish...I do wish that we could stay as unburdened as we are. My life is my own - that's the lesson I've been learning lately. I want it to always be as tonight - peaceful, happy, free. I want the choices I make to be my own business...and Tidus', of course.

I want the rest of our lives to be full of laughter; full of smiles.

But...

I need to make sure there's something to smile for first.

______________

I've set up a Yahoo!Groups group-thingy so you beloved readers will just get an email when I update or post a new story or whatnot. I think it might be better than hacking through FF.net just to find that I've not posted a word :P 

There's a really big fanfiction contest coming up in December on MM.org...all genres, including originals, are accepted! So why aren't you submitting stuff already? :P Look at the "We need Judges!" thread -- the first post. Choose your victim/category, and PM the judge...You can nominate your own fics or other people's - just nominate them! The application goes like this: 

Name of fic:

Author's name: 

Link to fic: (MM.org link preferred...FF.net's chronic downtime and all)

Award: (Which categories/awards are you aiming for? Some judges are doing two categories, so be sure to be specific...)

Excerpt from fic (Why does it deserve this award?):

Mind you, this is in Private Messaging; you don't submit your application in a thread. If you have any questions, just PM/E-mail me and I'll get right back to you on it. I'm the original and drama judge, so I would know the goings-on rather well. :P

Yeah, I know it's been almost three months since the last update. And I'm really sorry. It's having my fic totally, efficiently and thoroughly (not to mention, most shameful of all, reasonably) shot down by someone and subsequently getting writer's block, and then not being happy with what I DID write so that I rewrote the chapter five times (no joke) and then it's reformatting the computer and having it hate me when I try to install Windows again and then water polo practice, which only leaves me two hours in the day to do what I need to do. Which means all of that is homework time.

OH! And read 'semper fi!' And review it! Ehehe...happy birthday, Timmehs and Noelle :D And thanks to Kelseh-love for beta-ing! It gave me a much-needed boost of confidence. And kudos to Ashbear and Wayward Tempest (the temptress!)! Hehe...they're both such incredibly wonderful people. That reminds me. If you haven't read everything ever published by Ashbear - or Wayward, or both - you're a horrible human being :D Just kidding. But I HIGHLY recommend that you get yer butts over to their work, because they're both amazing authors. (Ashbear's 'Crimson Lies' made me burst into tears at more than one point. Maybe that's an indication...)


	18. ad astra per aspera

Note: Blatant allusions here to a one-shot I wrote a long time ago, Remembrance. Go read. It's my baby. 3 Also, I'm pushing the wedding chapter back a little bit...I'd intended this to be it, but that wouldn't have gone as smoothly as I wanted it to. And yes, I promise I'm revising Ch. 17.

Just slowly. I don't want writer's block again...

Also, as a note, 'ad astra per aspera' means 'to the stars through difficulties.' 

_______________

I thought...

I thought it would all be very simple. That everything was under my control.

Everyone seemed to be happy. Bahamut had the answers we needed, and Spira was peaceful.

But I overlooked one very important thing.

After all is said and done, when the day is over, no matter what queen or empress or Maestress presides...

Civil hate remains, and it isn't easily forgotten, even in this beloved, brittle Eternal Calm.

_______________

It took another five days before the scheduled meeting between Yuna and Nav actually took place. Both leaders would have held it earlier, given the chance, but old Tromell had always served as the scribe, and he was off in Macalania running one errand or another.The Guado leader was insistent on having him present at the event. It was suggested to Nav that he just get another scribe, but he insisted on the old routine. Formality and custom, Yuna was learning, was of high priority to him, even despite the reckless nature that was the trademark of his blitzball career. She had to admit that he was shaping up to be a fine leader: in the days that they'd spent there in wait, Yuna had seen how he handled his status, and she was impressed. He outwardly seemed to brush each matter off, but with or without the easy, dismissing attitude, he never abandoned a problem, and he often - not always, because he was still learning, but often - made the wisest choice available. It put her mind at ease.

Meanwhile, Yuna and her companions settled into a pensive kind of normalcy. She admitted that she couldn't say any of them were relaxed - it wouldn't be true. But they weren't on their toes as they had been the first day. Tidus teased her often about her constant inability to slow down and stop working, more out of an effort to get her to do so than for the humor of it. She was always either discussing whatever leaders discussed with Nav, in the Guado library composing some future speech, or playing with the few remaining children and mingling with the adults. Tidus wasn't often with her, but it compensated somewhat that as soon as she released herself from her duties, he was the first person she rushed to see (and it didn't hurt that when she did find time to flop down and sleep, it was with him). Despite her half-exhaustion, Yuna did look happy; her mood was lighter, her body more animated. Even Lulu noticed.

Alas, on the morning of the fourth day after her arrival, whatever fragile peace that might have been constructed was shattered. 

Yuna had slept in a little, which was uncommon for her. But it was a warm morning, and peaceful, so she was deliberately slow and unhurried in her rituals to take advantage of the rare moment of calm. As usual, Tidus hadn't even remotely considered waking up by the time she was ready to leave, so she didn't disturb him. Nevertheless, she was in a good mood, and stopped to have a short, friendly conversation with Amia, who sat curled up with a book and some tea in a corner of the inn's reception room.

Despite all Yuna's doubts, there was hardly any tension at all in the group. She and Amia, despite their differences, found enough in common to become fast friends; Lulu, however, would need a little more persuasion. The woman was slow to approach Amia, more out of Lulu's general personality than any mismatch of attitudes, but it was going well enough.

As soon as she stepped outside the inn, Yuna realized something was wrong. Usually at least a few Guado were out and about across Guadosalam by the time the sun rose; it had been up for more than an hour, and there was not a soul to be found. She stopped in her tracks to listen for a voice, puzzlement on her face. To her relief, she did hear voices - faint, but many of them, and angry, and coming from the direction of Nav's manor. She contemplating going back to get Tidus and the others, but snuffed the urge for the figurative "security blanket" and stepped forward towards the source of the fuss.

"This is an unpardonable crime!" she heard someone declare.

"Something has to be done, leader! _You cannot let this go!"_

The young Maestress saw Nav almost literally up against the wall, facing what was surely every Guado in the settlement, trying futilely to pacify them. "Now, please, all of you, be calm..."

"Calm?! There is vengeance due here!" A Guado man cried fiercely, and the answering, angry shouts of several more people reinforced the statement.

Yuna realized at that moment that whatever the problem might be, it was serious, and it was going to make for a long, exhausting day. She wished she had brought Tidus along after all; just the thought of what lay ahead made her weary.

"Everyone!" Yuna addressed the crowd loudly, and most turned and looked at her, for the most part silencing themselves. "Be reasonable..."

"Lady Yuna," Nav acknowledged, bowing, and she could see the relief in his expression. She had adopted something of a rule, trying her best never to interfere with the way he or any of the other regional leaders exercised their power, but the situation was getting - and likely had been - out of his control. 

"Please, all of you, if you will..." Yuna nodded to the crowd before her, speaking more softly. "I'd like to have a moment with your leader. I promise it won't take long."

A few soft murmurs could be heard, whether protest or gossip, but nevertheless they cleared a path for her and she was able to step through the manor's doors with Nav. He closed them against the mob, sighing in obvious frustration.

"So what's happened?" asked the Maestress.

"Tromell," said Nav wearily, "was killed on the Lake Macalania path yesterday."

"Oh...I'm so sorry...! What happened? How'd he--"

"Shot, Lady Yuna. Murdered. With a bullet in his chest to prove it." The Guado's expression shifted to exasperation. "The traveler who brought the news gave the rest of Guadosalam wind of it, and today they all fear for their lives!"

Nav let Yuna soak in that news; she leaned against the wall, sighing heavily, rubbing her temples.

"Oh, no..." _Not now. Not with all that I've done to make good between the Guado and the rest of the world...it couldn't have come to nothing, right...?_

"Forgive my weakness, Lady," sighed the Guado leader, "but I don't know what to tell them. I certainly can't tell them that they're safe, but that's what they want to hear..."

"Do you know who did it?"

"Not a clue. Tromell had been there awhile by the time the traveler - a priest - actually found him. He told us...we just fetched the corpse early this morning. No footprints, no scuffle, nothing."

"Is the priest still here?" Yuna asked, tugging at her sleeve nervously, thoughtlessly.

"No, he was on his way to Djose, and he couldn't stay. He said he'd be back within a week. I was able to ask him a few questions, though...he said he didn't see it happen. Just that he saw the body. He didn't disturb it, thankfully."

"Was he armed? The priest? Did you catch his name?"

"No, no, of course not. Well, he said his name was Cheb... "

Yuna sighed deeply again, shaking her head. "I don't know why someone could..._do_ something like this...why..."

Nav's answering smile was bitter.

"Because we are Guado, Lady Yuna, and they are not."

"Nav, believe me, I'm doing all I can to make it safe for you."

"Maestress, not even the command of High Summoner Ohalland could make a hateful heart love us. That's...just the way it is."

"I have pacts signed from every region promising no harm come to the Guado, or the Ronso, or Hypello. If we find out who committed the crime, Nav...the punishment! I'll have no choice...!"

"Can you send him?"

Yuna looked perplexed for a moment, put off by the sudden question, before realization took her.

She looked down thoughtfully for a moment, frowning. 

_How to explain...? And would he believe me?_

"I..." she began, and then paused for a long moment, thinking. "...Nav, can it wait? Just an hour or so?"

"Of course, Lady Yuna."

"I need to tell my companions about this," Yuna explained, bowing slightly.

"Absolutely. Take your time, Maestress."

It was with a strange sort of numbness that Yuna solemnly made her way past the crowd outside - which didn't seem to have gotten any smaller - and walked back towards the inn. Her heart was heavy; despite what Nav had said about the situation being out of her hands, she didn't believe it.

_Too many have died already, and now more. And it's senseless. Did I do something wrong? Did I forget something? Could I have prevented this with another speech, another law, a treaty?_

Was it my fault?

*****

Tidus was still peacefully dozing when she returned.

_Sleepyhead...he's lucky._

In another room she could hear Jecht's voice; Amia's, Rikku's, Wakka's. All spoke loudly, cheerfully. Amia seemed to be teaching Rikku a card game of some sort.

"Aw, but...!" whined the Al Bhed, and Yuna couldn't help but don a small, fond smile.

"Sorry, those are the rules."

"Can't I just--..."

"Nope."

"...Go fish...?" offered Rikku weakly.

"Rikku, this is _poker!_"

"Hurry up," Yuna heard Jecht say with amusement, "or I'll lay down my hand and cash in right now."

"Ooh, you meanie-person!" accused Rikku. "...That means I lose, right?"

The rest of them laughed, Rikku protested, and Yuna knew all was well with them. For the time being.

Closing the door, she sighed, pausing to absorb the serenity and quiet of the room while it lasted. It was a cozy chamber - while the Guado didn't have much going for them as far as windows were concerned, they did make sure that their guests were comfortable. And of course, there was Tidus, still curled up and sleeping like a baby. There was something...eternal about the entire moment. Her dearest friends all together, contented; Tidus at her side, happy, safe. All of it peaceful.

_I wonder,_ thought Yuna, with a smile, _how somebody can sleep so much when they do so little._

Nevertheless, she crawled gracelessly to Tidus, stretching out at his side and resting her chin on his shoulder gently.

"Where've you been, huh?" he muttered, startling her.

"I thought you were asleep."

"Halfway." Tidus smiled lazily. "Didn't have a reason to get up quite yet."

"Trickster." Yuna nuzzled the strong curve between his shoulder and neck. "How did you sleep?"

"Like a fiend." grinned Tidus. "Dreamed about blitzball, breakfast, and naked Maestresses. How about you?"

Yuna did laugh then, planting a happy 'good morning' kiss on his lips. "Just fine, thank you!"

"Good. So, what were you up to this morning?"

Her happy expression faded halfway; he noticed, and raised a hand to toy affectionately with a lock of her hair. He murmured, "Somehow I think that was the wrong question."

"No, it wasn't," Yuna shook her head. "because there's a lot I need to tell everyone. And I came in here to think."

"What's going on?"

"Tromell was shot and killed in Macalania yesterday. No one knows who did it, but it was deliberate, and there's..." Yuna sighed, brows furrowing in frustration. "Tidus, there's nothing I can do! I've done everything I can to make it safe for the Guado, I've established heaven only knows how many laws against hurting this race or that race, and now this...everyone in Guadosalam's afraid. The men want vengeance, but they're all scared...and Nav can't do much...he's struggling just to keep them at bay. Even he's afraid. And overwhelmed."

Tidus looked up at the cieling, closed his eyes, exhaled a long, slow breath, and swore.

"I think," began Yuna, laying her head on his chest and speaking in a tone that could only be described as apologetic, "I just ruined your morning."

"No, you didn't." Tidus looked down at her and embraced her lightly. "I'm glad I heard it first. Poor sweetie...heh, it never ends for you, does it?"

"I doubt it."

"What can I do?"

Yuna released herself from his grasp, standing up and slowly, thoughtfully pacing the floor. "It's...not so much Tromell's death that I need to think about...oh, this is going to sound so pathetic. Nav wants me to send him."

"Well, why not?"

She turned away from him, staring at a small collection of apparently unscented candles burning purposelessly in one corner. Her voice turned soft in remembrance, and she felt suddenly very self-conscious, afraid of what he might say. "Because...when you left, at...the end...I performed a sending. For you. And...I promised myself I wouldn't do any more sendings after that. It was over. That would be the last. Sounds ridiculous, I know...but...it was important to me." Raising her head, she closed her eyes, sighing slowly. "It was...sort of like...goodbye."

There were a few moments of silence between them, in which neither moved; Yuna listened to the soft sound of his breathing, and was strangely grateful for that small allotance. And then she heard sheets shuffle as he got up; heard a brief scuffle and a muffled 'Ow!' as he stumbled over something, making her hide a smile.

"Yuna..."

She turned to face him, a confused sort of half-smile on her face. "It's...okay, Tidus, it's just...sort of a bittersweet memory, you know? Kind of...I don't want to let it go. I don't want to forsake something like that for fear of inconvenience."

Tidus embraced her tightly. "What'm I gonna do with you, huh?"

Yuna looked up at him, her half-smile more true. "Kiss me. And then go wash up. I need to eat breakfast - I'm starved - but I want you there with me when I let the others know what happened."

He did. "Okay. Care to join me?"

And Yuna laughed. "Nice try, but you haven't got a chance."

"Never hurts to give it a shot," he grinned, chuckling. "Eat up. Love you."

*****

"I'm not much one to know about government and politics and so forth," said Amia dryly, much later, "but I'm guessing this is bad."

"That's an understatement," agreed Jecht darkly.

"So, what're we gonna do about this?" Tidus asked, folding his arms. "What can we do, for that matter?"

They sat (or stood, or knelt, respectively, whichever they felt like) at the entrance to the Farplane once more, and Bahamut among them.

"Little, from what I see." said the fayth.

"That seems to be the most prevalent option, no matter what comes upon us. Do nothing, because we can't do anything else." Lulu grumbled.

"But it's true..." countered Yuna. "I don't think I can do much more for them...there are laws against undue harm to pretty much everyone, and when I find out who did it I have to follow through with the punishments, no matter whether it was an individual act - which I'm sure it was - or if one of the leaders was involved. Another speech, and it'll make the Guado look like endangered animals in a reserve..."

"Well, aren't they?"

Annoyed, Yuna retorted, "I think not!"

"There are perhaps thirty Guado left in all, at the most. That might not even be enough to bring back the population. They are sanctioned and protected by yourself, the Lady Maestress. What of all the ranting and railing done over a single death? People die. Tromell was too old. He wasn't of any use to the Guado as a species."

Lulu rubbed her temples in frustration, teeth clenched. "You can't be justifying this..." 

"Not justifying it," Bahamut conceded, "simply expressing that his death is not as massive a loss as some would make it seem. Maestress, if the population isn't large enough, there's nothing you can do to stop its downfall. There would be no use in weeping and railing over the loss of a member of a doomed race. In contrast, you would not pursue the murder of a human man with half the urgency you do now. Murders happen, and sometimes they are entirely random. The Guado are, because of their history, more prone to this particular kind of untimely end. You already know all of this."

"Yes." affirmed Yuna. "I do. And I see no reason why I shouldn't do all I can to help them, even if it's futile."

"I realize that such a perspective comes from being a summoner, as you were. But I fear that you are still learning to tread carefully in political waters, Lady Yuna, and--"

"--And who are you to tell her such things?" snapped Lulu.

"...and I fear it may be dangerous," continued Bahamut, an edge of impatience in his voice. "which I only mention, Lulu, because one sees many things in a thousand years. Even if one appears to be a mere child."

Yuna tilted her head thoughtfully, taking a moment to contemplate what he said. "How so? Er, dangerous, I mean."

"You have many representatives working under you, Yuna. Many leaders. Please, understand that I stress that word. Leaders. How many of them care nothing for the Guado?"

"Well --"

"Forgive me, that was rhetorical. Let me continue. You do not even _know_ all of them. Yuna, Maestress, you may trust many of them, and many indeed may safely be trusted -- your uncle, or the priestess, for example. The Ronso leader, the Guado leader. Yuna, understand, the wretched of the earth would follow you without a moment's hesitation because you promise them safety. But what of your human brethren? When they realize that the majority of your efforts are going towards babysitting the ones they harbor grudges against, how glad do you think they will be? And how much more are they going to resent the Guado? That's what will happen eventually...I promise."

"Well, Bahamut, which is better? Being momentarily disliked or being remembered for helping salvage an entire race?" Rikku asked; Yuna was surprised by her cousin's sober tone.

"This," sighed the small fayth, "is the start of the Eternal Calm. Everything is up in the air, so to speak. Figuratively, it's sink or swim, and while a few are floundering, no one's gone under quite yet. The Ronso, I think, will do fine. They've not hurt anyone; they have their corner of the world, and it's rarely visited. Kilika's completely restored, and for all it's worth, it's more prosperous than ever. The sands of the Djose shore are no longer stained with blood. Spira is united under Maestress Yuna. And, being united, it has the power to use that unity to eliminate those whom they hate and fear. The Guado."

"I would never allow that to happen!"

"Lady Yuna, of course you wouldn't. But that doesn't matter. It doesn't have to be you that makes the decision; don't you see where I'm going? And how can you punish a region for disobeying your laws? Send an army against them, your own people? The southern islands don't have enough people to constitute any sort of military force, and Besaid is a good deal smaller than Kilika. It would be a foolish move, anyhow. If you gathered an army, so would they. Whatever may come will come; let it happen, Yuna, instead of fighting the inevitable. Sheltering these poor souls shouldn't be your main concern. The wheels have already been set in motion. There is little you can do now that would accomplish more than hurting your own reputation...and in politics, I'm sure you know, reputation is --"

"--is half the game. I know."

Bahamut nodded slowly. "The people seem perfectly happy as they are. I simply fear that this is something to be handled very carefully...don't misunderstand, I'm not asking you not to be charitable to the Guado. By all means, do. Just be careful. Be so preoccupied with preoccupying the rest of the world that they don't even take notice of the good you do for the Guado. That would mend things well enough."

Yuna sighed deeply, silently. It was mute, and she hardly moved as she did it, but everyone noticed. And they all understood what she meant. 

And Tidus, at least, agreed wholeheartedly.

*****

Yuna uneasily explained to Nav the reasons why she had to turn down the request of a sending, and to her surprise, he was readily alright with it.

_It must be that honor aspect of his personality. Vows are, thankfully, serious business to him..._

Nav sent a runner down to Djose both for a request for a priest and to call back to Guadosalam the first known witness of Tromell's corpse. He told Yuna that it would be at least a day or two before either came; she asked him if he might be able to hold the prearranged meeting without a scribe. With some thought, he agreed, and they both decided to keep the conference where it had originally been: the next day.

"Politics is boring." Yuna proclaimed much later, at dinner with Amia, Tidus, and Rikku. The latter giggled.

"That has to be the philosophy of the century, Yunie,"

"Why don't you quit?" asked Amia curiously. "If you don't like your job."

Yuna shrugged thoughtfully. "I guess...I want everything to settle smoothly. Like Bahamut said, things are still up in the air. And I don't know if anyone else that happened to be in my position wouldn't just act in their own favor."

"So you're obligated."

"A little bit," admitted the summoner, "but I'm very glad to help people."

"Seems like a royal pain in the ass to me." Amia chuckled, taking a bite of her meal. "No offense,"

"You're not the only one." Tidus mumbled agreement through his burger.

"Swallow,_ then_ talk." Amia advised, beaming. "Sorry, but it's been too long since I've been able to say that."

"_Mom..."_

Yuna nudged Tidus' ribs, hiding her laughter behind her knuckles. "Mind your mother!"

"Traitor!" he accused playfully.

"Besides, I didn't think you'd still have those bad habits, Tidus," grinned Amia. "Maybe I should _ground_ you."

Tidus looked heavenward, begging, "Shoot me, just shoot me. Put me out of my misery. This is embarrassing."

The women laughed, and when that laughter settled, they drank and ate and smiled.

Amia turned to Rikku to ask a question about the Al Bhed, a topic of intense interest to her; to avoid interrupting them, Yuna leaned in close to Tidus, murmuring,

"I think I might go and rest for a little while after this. Sorry, it's just that I'm very sleepy."

Tidus nodded. "Want me to go with you?"

"No, that's alright. I might just end up falling asleep on you."

"I don't mind,"

"Shouldn't you get in some practice time with Sir Jecht and Wakka? Don't stop practicing blitz, or you might just go soft around the belly," Yuna teased happily, poking his stomach.

"Probably so, but since you're trying so hard to get _rid_ of me, I guess I'm just gonna have to give you a hard time about it," countered Tidus with a smile.

"Oh, I am not, and you know it. But it's boring being with someone who's fast asleep. It's not very good for conversation, if anything! Besides, there are better things to do."

"I guess you're right."

Yuna kissed his cheek contentedly. "I'm sure you'll find something to keep you busy."

Several minutes and a few finishing bites later, they sat back, finishing off the last of their drinks with a bit of sparse conversation. They gradually dispersed themselves, Rikku wandering off to go to bed, Amia (_ever the scholar,_ Tidus thought, _and so typical of her_) hitting the Guadosalam library to research something that Rikku had mentioned about the Al Bhed, Yuna retreating to her room to doze. 

Tidus sat at the table alone for a few more moments, lost in thought, relaxing; as he did, Bahamut approached him, sliding into the chair across from his.

"Hi," Tidus greeted him in almost-confusion. Bahamut, for all he knew, hated him; what reason would he have for any contact with someone he didn't like?

"You're not so bad after all, you know."

A peaceful word coming from a little boy dressed in purple whose chin barely cleared the top of the table was sort of puzzling, but Tidus smiled wryly. "Coming from you, I guess that's a compliment."

"Don't misunderstand. I still don't like you."

That made him chuckle. "I empathize entirely, don't worry."

"You love Yuna."

"Yeah." Tidus nodded. "A lot."

"You'll keep her safe?" pressed the small fayth.

"You betcha, little guy. The very best way I know how."

"She has a long road ahead of her..."

"That's alright. I'll be with her."

"I wasn't sure," explained Bahamut, "how you would react to something like this. Like what happened today."

Tidus stretched one arm lazily, then the other. "Did I pass your test?"

"I'm glad you can keep her at ease."

"Tell me, did you plan all this? Tromell dying? You sound like you expected it or something."

"No, fayth never interfere in ways like that. But we knew that something of the sort would happen."

"D'you mind telling us how you guys can predict that sort of stuff? We'd love to know..."

"I can't."

"Ah."

"You have a lot to learn before you marry Yuna. It's a sad maester that doesn't know a whiff about his own realm. You need to learn."

"Hn...you're probably right."

Bahamut slid out of the chair, face slipping below the surface of the table in an almost comical manner to pop back up as he squirmed free.

Without so much as a word, or a goodbye, he turned and left.

Taking a final drink of his beverage, Tidus stood up and, with a sigh, headed for the library.

*****

Yuna was already fast asleep by the time Tidus returned. Stepping softly so as not to wake her, he moved about the room, washing his face and stretching to relax himself. After he finished, he sat and stretched out on the sofa, being careful not to flop, as he was usually inclined to do. Yuna needed sleep, and he'd feel guilty to no end if he were to disturb her.

_A long day._

_It's been one hell of a long day._

Tidus yawned and rubbed his eyes. He wasn't much of a bookworm - staring at pages on pages of tiny text gave him a headache. But it helped. He'd learned a few things, whether it be what he was looking for or something he didn't quite want to know.

_It's a sad maester,_ Bahamut had reminded him, _that doesn't know a whiff about his own realm._

That had also reminded him about what his marriage with Yuna would make him. Maester.

_Maester Tidus...? God, what an ugly title. Not me at all._

I guess I'm beginning to see where Yuna's coming from when she says she's not sure about it...

Yuna wanted a simple life. Uncomplicated. Frankly, so did Tidus, but he wouldn't dare force her either way. What kind of life she would lead would be her own decision; he would happily follow her either way. But it made him worry over her to see her working herself so hard.

Bahamut, however, was right. He would be useless unless he knew about Spira. And while he could rant for hours about the evils of the Church of Yevon, and had been pretty much everywhere there was to be on the planet, he couldn't say much about anything else.

So Tidus had given up his evening and shoved his nose into about fifteen books. It seemed to have paid off, though he'd have to squeeze (or kiss, or tickle, whichever seemed to be most effective) some more out of Yuna the next time she had a break.

_And God only knows when_ that'll _be._

So, maybe it would be awhile. But he was determined not to be useless to Yuna. He could, he speculated, make her job a good deal easier once he learned the ropes. And as it stood, Yuna looked like she seriously needed a vacation.

_Or better yet, a honeymoon._

Tidus debated for a moment whether he should crawl in beside her, being careful not to rouse her, or just leave her be for the night.

_Eh, she'll forgive me..._

He met up with Lulu on his way out; she merely gave him an acknowledging nod and stepped past him. Tidus wondered if something was wrong - normally, she would have stopped, given him some sort of evil eye, and raved about acting responsibly. Confused, he turned to face her, scratching the back of his head.

"Aren't you going to say something?"

Lulu stopped, turning her head. "What do you want me to say?"

"Er...I didn't want you to say anything...well, you know what I mean, about..."

"About Yuna?"

"Uh huh." Tidus shook his head. "Don't mean to offend you, or anything, but I just thought you'd have said something about it by now. Given me some long lecture, or something like that."

Lulu thought about that for a second, then said, "My job is to protect Yuna...and maybe I should lecture you. I do still worry about her, you know. Very much. But I know it was her choice, and she wouldn't choose something like that unless she was sure."

"Ah..."

Her icy tone returned. "Just be glad I know you well enough to be sure of that."

Tidus, a breathy chuckle escaping his lips, nodded. "Yes'm."

Making an encore appearance when she realized he failed to even attempt taking her seriously, her evil eye complimented her expression, which was as full of scowl as Rikku was full of energy.

"Jeez, take it easy, Lulu." Tidus sleepily let his hand fall to his side. "You don't have to babysit Yuna. She's a grown woman. She can take care of herself. And I'm taking care of her too. I wouldn't let anything happen to her. She's...my wife, you know...?"

"Well, not quite..."

_So much for the emotional appeal._

"You're going to pick over technicalities?"

"Better me, now, than the rest of Spira, when Yuna walks down the aisle hiding a baby under her wedding dress. _They'll_ pick at technicalities, too, and far more than I do..."

_Damn it, why did she have to be here, in this hallway, right at this moment?_

"Yes, I know that, Lulu. We've been over that already. She knew from the beginning. It was her decision alone, so stop acting like you can't trust _me_. Besides, you said you wouldn't lecture. You can stop mothering Yuna, you know...she gets along just fine on her own two feet without your opinion and commentary on everything she does."

"Tidus, whether you like it or not, I'm only doing this in her best interest."

"Yuna's the one that knows what's best for Yuna. Leave it at that, Lu...the last thing she needs right now is someone _else_ judging her."

Lulu reasoned impatiently, "She's like a sister to me. You know that. I only want the best for her."

"A sister? I know you love her, Lulu. But I'll be damned if that's the way you care for a sister. She has the rest of her life ahead of her, now, and that's a hell of a lot more than she had before. Honestly, let her choose how to live it by herself. Let her confide in you because she _wants_ to, not because you expect her to."

He caught a vague glimpse of her hurt, angry expression in the darkness before she swiftly and unceremoniously slapped him.

Tidus had winced as a reflex, stifling the more immediate urge to block the blow.

_Oh, no, mustn't hurt the *ladies,*_ he thought sarcastically.

She had, in that brief moment of time, turned on her heel and stormed off, belts and bangles clacking unhappily.

"Y'know," Tidus called softly after her, knowing she heard, "I told you it wasn't meant to offend you."

Lulu paused for the briefest of moments, listening, but didn't answer; she chose instead to continue her furious retreat and disappear into another room.

Tidus sighed, gingerly rubbing his cheek.

"Thank god she didn't use her nails," he mumbled to himself.

_I wonder if I could get Bahamut to resurrect the people who figured out how to make Midol. Winter's coming on -- do they celebrate Christmas here? That could be my gift to Lulu. Or maybe just as a peace offering. Or maybe not - women being women, she would think that it was an admission that she was right._

_Like her, I want Yuna to be happy. But it's my job to help make that happen; it's Lulu's job to make sure Yuna looks like a walking fairy tale. Happiness comes second to image, and I think that Lulu gets the two confused sometimes. It's exactly the opposite with Yuna - she understands that responsibility comes before happiness, but image and reputation mean very little to her. I've never seen her happier than when we were together, simply being ourselves, not just Maestress and Legendary Guardian. She appreciates what we have very much, probably because we lost it for awhile and thought it gone forever but got it back. And she could have her happiness by simply planting herself down in a small house in the country and giving her time to raise a family and live her life in peace. But there's work to be done, so Yuna will sacrifice her own happiness for everyone else's. Devoted...to a fault._

Putting it that way, Tidus realized with a little bit of surprise how strange everything must have been for her in the beginning. She was living in a world entirely opposite from the one she thrived and wanted to be in. Yuna probably felt, in a sense, something like a fish out of water.

With a yawn, he retired to his own room, happy to be able to stretch out and relax. Shedding his gloves, shoes, and shirt, he was all too glad to bury himself in the warm flannel sheets.

So he closed his eyes, the trials of the day catching up to him, and his train of thought gradually faded into that of dreams.


	19. Reality

This chapter's very different from all my others, but there's a reason for it, which you can find out at the bottom. The chapter's short for a reason and it's a little confusing but I know you can handle it. And I have many people to thank so check that at the bottom too ^_^

Chapter 19 has three POVs: The first is a completely dialogue-driven conversation between two characters, and I'm sure you can figure out one of them if you pay close enough attention and remember Chapter 18; the second is a monologue; the last is a just a first-person snippet. Sorry if it's choppy, but I wrote this in pieces. And the only reason it took me so long to get this out was because I tried writing several pieces and just decided on these :P

Watch for the POV changes -- they'll be denoted by line breaks and "*****" in the middle. Like scene changes in my other chapters. If I need to do any same-POV scene changes in this chapter, I'll denote those with "-----" so you can tell the difference. There's only one in this chapter, though, so I don't think that'll be much of a problem.

_____________________

__

"Well?"

"It went smoothly."

"No complications, then?"

"None."

"Then why have we recieved a summons for you from the maestress?"

"It's...not a surprise. Nav's people asked me a few questions as I passed through, but it's easy enough to decieve them when you're wearing priest-robes."

"And what did you tell them?"

"Made a grand show of looking like a passer-by, is all. I wasn't expecting them to find out so quickly, but all considered it went as well as it could have possibly gone."

"What about your weapon? It wasn't with you when you came in."

"Hid it, of course. I'll go back for it once it's safe to. A priest with a gun tends to attract a disproportionate amount of attention."

"Do you know what Yuna wants with you?"

"No."

"Go; don't arouse her suspicion. Would it be wise to go 'prepared,' though?"

"Probably not now. She's got all of her guardians with her."

"She always will. It simply becomes a question of how distracted they are at the moment. You never know how many of these chances will pop up."

"Tromell's 'unfortunate' death has probably put them on edge."

"You never know. Yuna's authority could just turn out to be more bark than bite."

"It hasn't been long enough to tell."

"It's been too long already. She's banishing order, not reinstating it. The longer she has power, the longer it will take to return things to normal. So go soon, my friend; Yevon be with you."

"And with you."

*****

I'm not jealous of Yuna, or Sir Jecht...really, I'm not, though it might seem so to the casual observer.

I'm very happy for them both. Tidus has given Yuna a sort of happiness I haven't seen in her since we were young and as carefree as we would ever be. We're both trying to do what's best for her, and that gives me some respect for him. Yet I suppose we don't see eye-to-eye on that all the time, which is to be expected. And Jecht -- he was kind and almost youthful when he left on the pilgrimage with Braska, but when we met up again at the end of the road he looked old, he looked tired; his voice showed his age. Amia seems to have put him in reverse, taken him back ten years. He might as well be my age. Even so, he is hardly the Jecht I knew. And that's not a bad thing; it's just...different.

But...I don't understand sometimes. Would Chappu not be able to help? He was one of Besaid's strongest young men, outdoing even his older brother Wakka.

Or is he long since lost to Sin...again?

Asking Bahamut makes me feel...uneasy. It's taboo, I guess, but the question burns in me.

Bahamut said he didn't work his magic for personal favors. Personally, I hardly believe him. Jecht's long-dead wife didn't need to be brought into this, and Jecht would have certainly functioned well enough without her. Yuna, though passionate and something like fragile, is an extremely determined individual. She would have done her job without Tidus and done it well enough.

Not that I'm complaining. His presence is a great help to her, and if they both survive this ordeal they'll be life partners for sure. Yuna deserves that.

But love blinds, perhaps -- neither of them seem to see how irresponsible they're being at the moment. Tidus especially, and his bullheadedness on the issue is frustrating. Putting her reputation (and what would they call their Maestress, if she concieved out of wedlock? It'd ruin her!--) and possibly her whole career at stake...it's entirely foolish. But both of them insist; surely some of that is through Tidus' convincing, because Yuna's gone through something of a transformation in the short time (how long has it been, a week? - less? - Yuna would have kept score, but I've not) since his return, and from my standpoint not all of it's for the better. She's happier, by far, but she's developing something of a selfish streak (by self, interestingly enough, I must include Tidus as well; they never seem to be far from one another; better to just count them both as one person and be done with it.) and it concerns me a little. Though I didn't mention it to her, and I'd never say the actual words, refusing to send Tromell was downright stupid. Tidus would have forgiven the breach of her little vow under the circumstances, if he knew of it at all. I doubt he did. Albeit what she did to prompt her taking that vow was sweet, it should not have taken any kind of precedence over her duty.

Rikku and Wakka seem to take a good deal more discretion, but for very good reason. Once-Yevonites would be flabbergasted; the Al Bhed would shun them. Probably, anyway. But they, too, insist. And even with that discretion the choice is foolish. There are too many risks that they seem to ignore. If their relationship was discovered and people had a sour response to it, it wouldn't look good at all. Yuna cannot afford to have unpopular guardians, especially now, when she needs public support so much.

I...I know my own duty. It's to protect Yuna and to make sure she has the best life possible. Even so, I can't stop thinking about it. Chappu -- he was possibly as much to me as Tidus is to Yuna, and yet he's not here. And I can't dare to bring myself to ask Bahamut. I can hardly look at him, because the question jumps to the tip of my tongue whenever I do, no matter what conversation or situation we might happen to be in. But we can't afford distractions, so I don't bother to ask. Maybe in a moment of calm I might be able to scrape up the courage the raise the question in private, but...not now. There's always some bitter price to be paid for asking a question like that, and I think I might be just a little short on the required currency.

It's shameful -- I'm happy for Yuna and Tidus, for Jecht and Amia and Wakka and Rikku and whoever else on Spira happened to recently stumble across someone who made them happy. But oh, it hurts to watch them. Yuna'll just lean over and kiss the man, out of nowhere, for no reason at all - happy as can be, and she'll send secret woman-grins and share hushed giggles with Rikku, who knows what the feelings are like. Not Lulu, silent-somber-grieving rule-upholding matron-who-doesn't-love.

I can imagine that that's how I come off to them, and I regret that a little. Yuna and I used to be so close, and I used to share just the secrets with her that she and Rikku now pass between one another. Used to. And then Chappu died, and...well, how can you expect a woman to deal with that? I was lost. I had no idea what to do. We'd had our future planned together since scarcely after I could call myself a woman, down to the house and tablecloths and bedsheets and hearth rugs. I was a girl then: I didn't even want to consider considering the possibility that one day he might not be there. So I didn't prepare for it until it was far too late. And it's fair to say that I wasn't prepared for it at all.

But then, he had promised he would return to me. And Chappu's promise...

That was something he never went against. So...

So yes, it hurt. And I didn't know what to do. I don't think anyone did.

Yuna didn't know what to tell me; she was only always there, comforting me, even though I never cried but once or twice in her presence. Even then, my pride was too great for that. So I guess that's when I threw myself into watching over Yuna, and wrapping myself around my dear summoner, despite the fact that my mere presence made me afraid for her and even if she finished the journey, I wouldn't have the strength to. I took the role of guardian thrice, and the first gave up, the second died (which will forever shame me in the eyes of all who know) and the third...had the strength to do anything in the world. But I was afraid of losing her. I was afraid just like she was afraid.

Because -- and believe me when I say this -- there is no one on this earth quite like Yuna. And even if she was willing to defeat Sin, whether by conventional means or the way we actually did conquer it, her life was so infinitely more precious and wonderful and worthwhile when she was there to live it.

But Yuna was Yuna. And that meant that she would follow her heart, no matter what Wakka or I happened to think.

So we departed.

And then came Tidus, and she was practically swept off her feet by nightfall.

I don't...resent him exactly. Well, not really - or at least I know it's unfair to. I know I shouldn't. He makes her happy in the way that I cannot (and have no wish to - that, at least, is the job better left to someone else). And he does it well. But seeing such a storybook ending for them both brings back memories of my own unfinished fairy tale, and - though I can't forgive myself for it - jealousy reigns, at least for a little while. The pilgrimage was supposed to be ours - I didn't want it to be his story. It was supposed to be a quiet, bittersweet time for Wakka and Yuna and Kimahri and me, while Yuna pulled us all forward until we had to blurt out our rushed, tearful goodbyes, abandoning the somber rituals of farewell-and-thank-you we'd all practiced a thousand times in our heads.

It wasn't supposed to be his story at all. Their story. We took something of a backseat while Yuna fell head over heels in love and Tidus realized that he happened to carry the secret to the Eternal Calm.

So...yes, it hurts. And I'm not sure Tidus reads me quite right. I don't hate him at all, a little envy notwithstanding. I'm actually quite grateful to him, when I forget my own selfishness.

But what he said -- 'because she wants to, not because you expect her to' - oh, that can't be forgiven. For who is he to say, when he's known Yuna for less than a year, while her original guardians have known her for the better part of her entire life? He may be closer to her now than I am, but that doesn't erase my entire history with her. I never expected Yuna to...

...well...

Put into a certain light, perhaps...it did seem that way.

Yuna had been my closest companion for so long -- it was just sort of a routine, an expectation, maybe -- we shared our secrets. Maybe not all of them - I'd not even think of asking for details about her relationship with Tidus, though she did force me to tell about mine with Chappu once; well, not force me, perhaps, it was a game - but I digress. There was a bond of trust there, and the idea that Tidus could so easily brush that off and act as if it were nothing at all...that was just...infuriating. It was so inexplicably below him.

And he had the gall to tell me it wasn't meant to offend. Incredible. Simply unbelievable. Chappu would have never...

But that's where I have to stop myself. If I keep comparing Tidus to Chappu, I'll be tying myself in one big messy knot for the rest of my natural life. Tidus is not Chappu, Tidus will never be Chappu. I taught Wakka that lesson in Kilika. That was ages ago, but I still find that my mind forgets sometimes. I guess the worst part is when I glance idly at them, not paying attention and maybe half-dreaming, and all I see is Chappu, a smudge of gold where fire-red hair might be, slipping a lover's-smile or an embrace or at worst a kiss to a lovestruck Yuna who is very certainly not me. And then the feelings of white-hot jealousy-betrayal-grief fill me for a scant moment before I remember the way of it all. And my imagined-Chappu is just Tidus, and Tidus is nothing like Chappu at all, save physical traits.

And Chappu, despite however hard I might wish or try to believe otherwise, is dead.

But the feelings remain, and they bother me for some time, and it doesn't help at all. It is hard to convince yourself that what you see is wrong...that those first immediate impulses and emotions are misplaced and that awful feeling that fills you is entirely unnecessary.

That's my own problem, though. I can't resent Tidus because of it. He can't help looking like Chappu, and I couldn't possibly expect him to act like Chappu just because he bears such a resemblance. But because of that resemblance, I cannot hate him for any other reason besides the fact that he's not Chappu. And that is senseless and sad. Tidus isn't stupid; however hurtful, he said what he said for a reason, and while I've yet to figure that out all the way, I'm sure that he meant it and believed in those words for a reason.

But if that's how I really appear to him, then...

...then what does Yuna think of me now?

I'm...afraid of that question. Just a little bit, but the fear is there.

I guess...I'm afraid of a lot of things. But I'm most afraid of my own weakness; Chappu's death proved that. But I'm stuck, either way. I distanced myself from Wakka and Yuna to lessen the pain that would be felt when they died. Because, I knew, I would live to see them both pass away. Luck - or some curse - is always running with me that way, so I vowed to be ready.

But this -- seeing her gone, while she's still alive and well, and Tidus standing as a possible barrier between us -- this might just hurt worse.

*****

"So...what is it you need help with, Rikku?"

"Over this way." Rikku gestured towards the airship, sitting silently off to the side of the Moonflow road. "Dad - err, Cid - picked up a lot of stuff from the Zanarkand ruins awhile back and I was wondering if you'd be able to tell us what they were. He's got a big passion for cataloging this stuff, y'know. It's sorta like his hobby. And we figured you'd know best. It'd really make his day."

"Oh, I see. Well, er, I'll do what I can..."

Rikku looked back at me and stifled a laugh behind her hand. "He'd've asked Jecht, too, but I think Dad's a little scared of him. Oh!--oh, that was rude, sorry..."

I couldn't help but chuckle. "Don't worry about it. Jecht scares a lot of people."

"Oh, phew. Well, there are a lot of trinkets, and this really odd-looking machina...pretty big, too. Dad's gotten to calling it a 'drehkysypup,' but that doesn't really help..."

"A...thingamabob? I see." Though of course, I didn't. Big, and what Rikku called machina -- there were a lot of large machines in Zanarkand, and those two clues didn't narrow it down very far at all. But it would be figured out soon enough.

Rikku talked almost nonstop as we made our way into the airship and through the halls, nearer to the back. I half-listened, engrossed instead in wondering about what 'relics' from 'way back then' she had waiting for me. Trinkets and machina - what would they be? What she could call 'trinkets' could be little nothings or tools that this Spira hadn't even heard of or horrific things I would be ashamed to show to her. And the machina -- it could easily be some awful weapon. There were a lot of weapons in Zanarkand, and the chances that her 'machina' would be one of them were decent. And I had read enough science fiction novels in my day to know the effects of spreading technology to civilizations that weren't prepared for it.

Or it could just be that I was thinking too much and letting my imagination get the best of me. But one can't often help it, when placed in this sort of situation...

Alright, so I wouldn't know. Zanarkand is - was - reality; but what I have now seems to be a bunch of nonsense, some jumbled-up dreams come true, without regard to discern between nightmare and fantasy. I have my life...again. No matter that I hardly even knew I lost it at the time, though now I'm starting to find that I have memories of what has to be the space Jecht called the Farplane.

Seems plenty like a dream to me. But then again, everything does lately. Jecht -- oh, I remember vividly _that_ loss. And Tidus, all grown up so suddenly. And engaged! I found myself still soaking in the bitter fact that I had missed more than half of his boyhood, and still trying to see the boychild of seven years that I swore I knew so well. Well, I guess the key word there is 'knew' - he's a lot different now, and I'm ashamed to say I can't really claim to know him at all. But I want to - very badly. He's my son, and well-cherished, even if the 'quality time' aspect of the relationship is a little...under par, per se.

"Over here!" Rikku caught my attention with an over-expressed beckoning motion, and I followed her down a separate corridor into a cold, dank-smelling room. She flipped a switch, and the overhead lights flickered to life.

I don't know quite what I expected, but when the lights came on and I got my first glimpse of Zanarkand in almost a week or a thousand years, all my apprehension flew out the window. And strangely enough, I felt nothing. What Rikku and the other Al Bhed had was a Zanarkand that was little more than a petri dish for examining: on each wall, and in the middle of the room, shelves reached near to the ceiling, and each "artifact" was neatly placed neatly in its own little spot.

"Rikku...this is going to take forever..."

"Well, that's okay!"

I looked over at her and she gave a crazy-happy scientist grin, clipboard under her arm and pen in her hand - it did make me smile, if anything. "Is it, then?"

"You don't have to do it all at once. Heck, you don't have to do it at all, y'know? I just thought you might like to see this, and maybe tell us a couple things about all of it on the way."

With a glance upwards toward the top shelves, I nodded. "Alright, I will. But I hope you have a ladder."

She giggled. "Oh, yeah. Sure thing."

"Rikku, do you mind if I...look around for a couple minutes before we start?"

"Not one bit! Take your time," she chirped.

So, almost casually, I stepped forward, and took a look at the closest shelf. The "artifacts" were rusty or decomposed or so caked in dirt that it was hard to tell, in truth, what they were at first glance. I reached out and picked one up - a mostly cylindrical thing, all rusted over. Metal. A can of some sort...

Ah, there we go.

I turned the cylinder over and saw what I had expected to see - a nub at the top. Holding the can gently, half afraid that it would crumble in my grasp, I shook.

"Ah?! What're you doing?" Rikku yelped, visibly stopping herself from rushing over and snatching the thing out of my hands.

Aiming the can at such an angle as so she could see, I pressed the nub, and a white vapory spray shot out and disappated into the air. Rikku squawked and scooted back in surprise, and I couldn't help the inexplicable, giddy burst of laughter that snuck out of me.

"What _is_ that?!"

"Aerosol. Either this is bug spray or some kind of polish or compressed air or something." I snickered.

"...'Bug spray?' It's not gonna...give the airship a bug problem, is it?"

I laughed again, harder than before, and placed the can back on the shelf, shaking my head.

"Wh...well, okay...but why do you need compressed air...? Isn't uncompressed air good enough?"

"Oh, Zanarkand used it for lots of things, I guess. Cans like this, and then scuba gear, for those who couldn't hold their breath underwater...those were mostly foreigners. Like myself,"

"Huh? You're not from Zanarkand?" she asked, and I shook my head.

"Bevelle. But I moved to Zanarkand at my first chance, and spent the next ten or so years there. Until...well...yeah. Until I 'died,' I guess. That sounds so strange..."

Rikku winced and squeaked out an apologetic 'sorry,' but I grinned at her. "Don't worry about it. Now this here..." I picked up the next object - a small pocket-knife, something that Tidus probably would have carried if we were still there - pried it open, and turned the point in her direction as if to emphasize something, which spooked her again and made her move to my side, "is something a boy about your age would carry."

"So there were fiends in Zanarkand, too?"

_Quick girl,_ I thought. "No, not in the city. It was more of a fad, but depending on your district, you might have had to use it once in awhile."

"On what?"

_Or maybe not_, I amended. "Well, other boys; what else?"

"Ack!"

Folding the knife back into its slot, I placed it back on the shelf and picked up the next item. At first I couldn't tell what it was, so I turned it over, examining it closely.

"Um...Amia?"

"Hnn?"

"Do...do you think that maybe we might find something in here that would defeat Sin? Or help to?"

I glanced at her and grinned. "So that's the reason you wanted me to do this. You should have just said so."

"Well...sorta...I mean, we just had this pile of stuff laying around back here and we haven't had the time to do more than organize it and you'd know best and --"

"Rikku, it's fine; calm down, sweetie! I don't know, though."

"Well, there has to be at least something left. Bevelle might've been stronger, but Zanarkand had some big weapons too..."

_Damn. She knows_. "We'll see."

"Thanks for your help...I mean, really. I don't want Yunie to worry any more than she already does, the little worrywart. Are...are you ready to start? Or do you wanna look around some more?"

"Well...we might as well begin."

"O--kay!" Rikku cheered, and out came the clipboard. She seemed unable to contain the burst of energy that caused her to hop, "Let's hit it!"

-----

"Nothing," I said once we finished for the day, much later, and I was strangely relieved. "Absolutely nothing useful. Sorry, Rikku."

"Oh...it's okay. Dad'll be tickled pink with just this data and stuff. And maybe when you have some free time and you're bored or something you can come in here and do some more. Help yourself, seriously. I'll tell Dad; he won't mind one bit."

I nodded. "Alright."

"I'm starved...what about you, d'ya wanna go get something to eat?"

With a slight shake of the head, I declined. "I'd rather stay here and look for a few minutes. Is that okay?"

"Oh, sure. D'you want me to stay? Or can you find your way out?"

"If I'm not back by tomorrow, send a search party."

She laughed. "Got it. Have a blast! Sure you don't want me to bring you something, or something?"

"I'm sure."

She left, and once she did, I returned to the spot where we had stopped, brooding quietly over the items before me. Most were common household items, nothing to squeal over, but Rikku had taken delight in all of it; an archaeologist at heart, maybe.

And that had to be the strangest thing. What was my life two weeks ago had swiftly become ancient history...literally. I gently picked up one of the items, one I'd instantly recognized - despite its rusted-over surface - as a child's locket of some sort. There was no chain anymore, and the locket lay open, but the glass was cracked and dirtied, making discerning the small picture inside impossible. And I felt guilty about peering at it, trying to, for some reason; as if I were looking into a stranger's secrets. Somewhere I didn't belong.

All these things had seen a millenium of what was, from what I could discern, nothing but death and destruction. They were remnants of something I had learned to dually love and hate: Zanarkand, a taste of heaven. Heaven, but with a bitterly human twist, and that made it occasionally comparable to hell. But I had loved Zanarkand, for all that it was. And the ruinous state that it lay in now, I couldn't imagine. Surely it still glowed brightly enough at night to blind the stars; surely there couldn't be an abandoned sacred place where my metropolis used to lay before me, oozing potential for the ambitious girl I had been. That world couldn't just be...gone. That was impossible.

I considered asking Rikku if she could take me to Zanarkand to let me see it with my own eyes. It would, of course, have to wait until it was convenient, but the impossibility that Zanarkand could so easily be simply _gone_ tugged at my heart and wouldn't let go. Sure, I had the proof looming over me in neat, dead rows -- but that didn't matter. Maybe it was just that Zanarkand was a matter of heart and faith: maybe if we dreamed hard enough...

But I knew better. I'd tried that before.

_____________________

I wrote this chapter this way because I want you, the readers, to be able to see the same situation from different eyes. We all - or most of us, anyway, though I don't know how you could get through DCT without a penchant for it - love Yunis fluff, but Lulu has her thoughts, too, and people may point fingers at each other and cast blame, but no one calls themselves the bad guy. I might consider doing a Lulu POV later in the story, but for right now, I'll just focus on Ch. 20 ^_^ Moving on...

This chapter is also short because it's DCT's birthday. Yep, one year ago today (January 25th) I unleashed the monster and never looked back ^_~ Gosh...it's been a whole year...wow, I can hardly believe it. I never thought I'd still be working on this a year later...but it's been so fun. I'm totally in love with writing DCT and I'm so happy that it's captured the attention of so many people. Thanks so much to all the reviewers, especially those who have been there since the beginning, or followed for a long time: Fire Rules, Noelle, Ethereal Fury, Wings of Stars, No One and all the others...*sniff*

Special thanks to:

Wings of Stars: You're wonderful. I can't remember exactly what was said but I know I whined to you about Chapter 19 some time ago and you had something to do with me thinking up its general concept. And you've just been great help all-around. Plus, your fic is fluffiliciously wonderful. THANK YOU!

Chris Poirer: Your emails have been so incredibly helpful and commenty and I'm so indebted to you for all your wonderful pointers. I'm sorry I've been getting slackish with my responses but I promise, if you haven't heard from me by the time you read this, you will soon. Finals, and fanfiction, and email too...oh yes, certainly masochism. ^^ Most certainly.

And last but certainly not least, No One. *clings* ^^ You've been so wonderful and helpful (and distracting :P) and I don't even know how to thank you. Your comments and betas are uber-helpful; and of course, the chapter wouldn't be the same without your opinions on this snippet or that snippet. I'm sure I drove you halfcrazy with that and I apologize, but I'm also very grateful to you, too. ^^ *offers chocolate chip cookies in gratitude* :D

Yep. Distracting indeed. Readers, if I'm slow getting a chapter out, blame it on him. ^__^

Just kidding!

Okay, I haven't done this for awhile, but I do have some music recommendations :P If you're even remotely interested in Broadway stuff, the Rent soundtrack is absolutely wonderful. I can't stress it enough; if you have the chance, listen to the soundtrack, because you can gather most of the plot from it and it's just an awesome story and so emotional and...yeah. I'm a Rent fanatic alright. I'm not much for religion, but "Children of Eden" does strike my fancy a bit, though I have yet to hear more than a song or two. That and I'm seeing a revival of the Disney child in me ^_^ The soundtracks of the Broadway productions of "The Lion King" and "Aida" also have my interest right now. Mind you, as far as the former is concerned, the music is so much better in the Broadway version...and I love Heather Headley's (she played Nala and Aida in those two plays respectively) voice anyway. Also, Live365.com has become my very good friend. You can find a radio stream of literally any kind of music, and knowing me, that floats my goat just perfectly. ^_~ Game music, J-pop, J-rock, Broadway music, movie orchestrations, probably even polka too...I wouldn't know...yep, shutting up now. Enough of my rambling.

So all in all, thank you all SO much for sticking with this story thus far, and I hope I'll still see you all at the end of the road. ^_^ Tally ho!


	20. Wishes

Troubled over what she had seen, and not quite willing to face anyone else at the moment, Amia found herself leaving the airship behind her and retreating into the most effective hideaway available: the library. She needed something to distract her, or, she felt, perhaps just to make her forget altogether. Trying to envision Zanarkand as some dead, lifeless ruin left an unhappy knot in her stomach, and she wasn't sure if she could quite explain that to any one of her companions. Any one of them aside from her husband, who understood well enough himself how it was. 

She spent a long time strolling slowly down the aisles of the library and looking at the books on the shelves, almost afraid to touch them – they looked as dead as the pieces of Zanarkand that Rikku had shown her. It did nothing to help her mood. When she did touch them, finally, the ones she reached her hands out to were the ones that she had sworn not to look at.

Despite her best resolves to forget about the happenings earlier in the day, she eventually found herself retreating to a sofa with an armful of books: all the ones she guiltily admitted would only make her thoughts revolve around the situation. All sorts of books: copies of ancient memoirs, history books, books in Al Bhed. All about Zanarkand.

_It has to be some sort of sin to do this, thought she. This isn't research. This feels like...like..._

_Like digging up graves._

_But I need the truth...don't I? I need to know what really happened, I need to know that it's real...that my grief isn't for nothing. Though..._

Amia, uneasily, had admitted to herself that in fact Zanarkand was gone. This simple fact she could accept. But it hadn't sunk in, and she was waiting for that bittersweet grief to come – the grief that comes when mourning loved ones, the grief that she knew so well. The reality of it had not quite touched Amia, and this left her feeling as if she was teetering on the edge of a cliff, waiting achingly to feel the rush of gravity against her heart as she plummeted...but she still had yet to fall. She waited for it, but it didn't come, and this was unbearable to her.

"Eh dra vuin rihtnat yht ceqdo-drent oayn uv edc aqecdahla, dra knayd sadnubumec uv Zanarkand fyc cipzaldat du yh yspicr po dra cibaneun sylrehy faybuhno uv Bevelle," said one of the books. 

One told the story through the words of an old scholar: "Just before the horrible Sin appeared, a terrible war raged between Bevelle and Zanarkand. When the armies of Bevelle attacked Mount Gagazet, they heard a song echoing across the snowy slopes. ''Tis a song from an otherworld,' they said. The soldiers panicked and ran. And then, as if to pursue the retreating armies, Sin appeared!"

Amia paused there, gently touching her fingers to the faded text on the book's aging pages._ I was already long dead when this happened. _

"Some time later, scouts from Bevelle braved the mountain. On the other side, they witnessed the ruins that had been Zanarkand. The city destroyed. Not a single soul left standing. Gone! In its place, a multitude of the fayth had gathered on Gagazet. They were singing a song. It's the song we now call the 'Hymn of the Fayth.' And that, as they say, is that."

She closed her eyes at that, able to crisply imagine the expressions of surprise, confusion and fear on the faces of weary, unshaven soldiers. _They would have fled from the fayth. Of course they fled from the fayth. After Sin, they would not have known what to expect from anything._

_They must have been so afraid...not knowing, so soon after Sin's birth, when it would strike. It destroyed their enemy, Zanarkand, but it was not their weapon – they surely suspected that it would turn against them as well, but they must have had no idea...no idea at all that it would be a plague that would haunt or destroy them more than twenty generations later._

Amia closed that book.

_Why is it,_ she wondered,_ that every time I go to escape something I wind up in even more trouble than when I started?_

_Then again, that's life, isn't it?_

It was in that moment of undistracted silence that she heard, just barely, the sounds of a sphere being played in some distant chamber of the library. Of course the library had history spheres; god only knew where they got them, but they had them, and Amia had already discovered that they were off-limits to the normal public. But of course, that generalization did not include her, so curiosity roused her from her reading and she walked toward the source of the sound.

Until then, Amia had not stopped to think about the spheres beyond the fact that they had them. Now, recognizing this, she wondered where they had the room to play the things. There were spheres that projected small images, for example a man giving a speech, but the spheres that would be held in high importance in such a place as this would be the ones whose projections filled the room. There had to be some sort of chamber for them, thought Amia, so that was what she looked for.

She found it quickly, annexed in an obscure little corner of the library. Only a feeble-looking door sealed it off from the main chamber, and Amia was almost amused to see "No Public Admittance" written on its surface – in four tongues. The warning was written in every language of Spira: Al Bhed, Spiran, and the scrawling script of what she assumed to be the Ronso and Hypello languages. Amia wondered if Yuna had ever seen it, and whether Yuna would have grasped the irony in it if she had. She didn't much doubt it.

Without thinking, Amia turned the knob on the door and pushed it open quietly, finding herself mutely surprised at how cold the metal was. Only after she had stepped inside and closed the door did she consider that she might have been better off knocking. 

The room resembled a great dome; truthfully, that's all it was: a dome with a very small platform in the center for placing and playing spheres on. There were no lights on the walls – the sphere provided all illumination, and that was plenty. The sphere in question glowed brightly blue in the center of the room, its horrific image frozen on the walls like a mural from hell: Zanarkand, brightly lit, tainted with reds, oranges, browns; explosions, crumbling buildings in the distance; Sin. Even she, who had never seen the great beast before, found it unmistakable.

The boy, Bahamut, stood facing the sphere. He didn't seem to notice her, and the image frozen over his profile as well as the great shadow he cast on the wall behind him left Amia feeling strangely frightened. Nevertheless, she stepped forward and slowly took in the full projection the sphere provided. 

The city was eerily alive, and not the normal hustle-and-bustle; even at the frame the sphere had stopped on, the entire image looked as if someone had taken a full-range photograph of purgatory. Masses of people, panic and fear clear on their faces, scrambled over each other to reach towards some unknown sanctuary.

They didn't know, or maybe were too afraid to admit, that there wasn't one...

Many were empty-handed, but others carried things in their arms: belongings, weapons, crying children. She wondered quite what they meant to accomplish, taking with them anything more than their loved ones. Did they, mere ants, mean to fight the awesome beast if worse came to worst?

But then again, had they not been surviving that way for a thousand years? Wasn't it only a scant few months ago that Spira finally laid its weapons to rest?

"I didn't mean to interrupt you." Amia offered to Bahamut quietly. "I'll leave if you want me to. I was...simply curious. I heard..."

"You're welcome to watch, if you can stomach it." The boy, for all the strength he usually showed, now looked defeated. His voice was monotone, subdued, and his eyes never left the sphere. Amia approached him, standing with hands clasped together in front of her – she wanted to at least reassure him, but she knew very well that it would simply drive him away.

"If you can stomach it," he had said. If. And that was a powerful 'if.' Amia already knew that this frozen, horrible second would be something she would remember for the rest of her life, and she paused for a moment before replying, wondering if it would be wise to agree. But then again, it was like a gruesome car wreck: sickening to look at, but you couldn't bring yourself to look away.

"How did they make this? A sphere like this?" asked Amia, as an answer.

"It's a compilation of the memories of pyreflies. A composite sphere."

She blinked. "We never saw pyreflies in Zanarkand...so this couldn't have been the beginning of it, right? Sin had to be there for some time. How long?"

"Oh, it was. The dream world of our Zanarkand was created from the memories of pyreflies. You never saw pyreflies in Zanarkand because the shimmery substance they're made of was used to create Zanarkand's miracles: the lights that never expire. Everything from the lights in the blitz sphere to the cross-city transportation. It caused something of a disruption in the Farplane, but the pyreflies weren't destroyed – they still lived, but essentially trapped where they were built. Sort of like spheres. This," Bahamut continued, using a sweep of the hand to gesture to the image around them, "is Sin's first moments."

Amia paused in shock, absorbing that. Modern armies took hours, if not days, to bring a city to its knees. With soldiers alone, it could take weeks.

And in what had to be only its first few minutes of life, Sin had already doomed the great city.

"How long?" Amia whispered.

"This is less than ten minutes after Sin's appearance."

"And didn't they do anything to stop it?"

Bahamut seemed to sigh lightly. "They tried, but Zanarkand was unready. Who could have expected it? Even with a war between Zanarkand and Bevelle. Only a small percentage of Zanarkand's weapons were even remotely equipped to stand up against something equivalent to a fraction of Sin. Zanarkand...may have been advanced, but they weren't warmongers. Bevelle was the one with the big guns, and Zanarkand realized that too late. At first, they all thought that Sin was Bevelle's creation, but quickly they realized that it couldn't have been. Sin was too strong even for Bevelle. For both of them combined."

"So Zanarkand was doomed anyway."

"That's not for anyone to say. They weren't helpless. Outmatched, yes – a longshot, yes, but they might have survived and defeated Bevelle's great armies. It was Sin that doomed them. From then on, it wasn't much more than a cleanup act for Bevelle's troops."

Amia and Bahamut stood there silently for a moment together. His eyes were fixed on the sphere – hers on the walls.

Finally Bahamut said simply, "Would you like to see your son?"

Amia blinked as her light trance was broken, turning to the child with a look of surprised confusion. "Tidus? He...?"

In response, Bahamut set his hand to the side of the sphere and as his fingers moved against it, Amia watched the scene before her change in fast-forward, too swiftly to make any sense. It stopped again after a moment, focusing on the main ground-road through the city. She caught Tidus instantly: he was hard to miss, flaxen hair standing out like a sore thumb from the darkness around him. Auron was beside him – Auron, babysitter and guardian extraordinaire. _Even then,_ she thought, relief mixing into the myriad of emotions she was feeling. Looking closer, they both held swords: looking closer, it was for a reason. A horde of small, oddly bug-like beasts was closing in on the pair, and they faced the danger head-on: Auron confidently, Tidus hesitantly. With Tidus' first swing she saw that he was new to it and that the sword he brandished was one of Jecht's – one, in fact, that Jecht had kept for as long as she could remember. She watched them escape the horde; she watched them escape the crumbling city, Tidus scrambling to safety just in time; she watched his disbelief as he clung there to that scrap of what was once a road, Auron holding him up by the shirt as if he was going to beat the boy senseless. Tidus was so different then from the young man she saw now...now, she predicted with a small inner smile, Auron would not have needed to hold him and force him forward.

"This is your story," Auron growled, and Tidus squirmed helplessly, fright in his eyes. "It all begins here."

Amia had the strange feeling that she was watching her son being born, in some strange way. Jecht, her own death, and all the pain he endured in Zanarkand were nothing now. This was his birth. His life would begin here; his end would be determined by this one single moment he had no control over. Tidus had no choice.

"He's shaped up a bit since then, I see," commented Amia.

Bahamut made an 'mm'-ish noise in his throat, an unaffected note of agreement. "Everyone does in the end. It's simply a difference of when. And whether they get the chance to live out their lives, having reached such maturity."

In the long silence that followed, Amia was the only one to interpret it as awkward. She pondered his words, finally asking out of pure curiosity, "What about your family? What happened to them that night?"

"That isn't important."

And Amia saw by how he looked away that it was, indeed, important. Thoughtfully, she sat and leaned her back against the cool cement wall, palms pressing into the ground beneath her. She wasn't sure which earth she meant to grip: Guadosalam's or Zanarkand's.

"You're a poor liar. Did all of them die?" asked Amia softly.

"They had all been dead for some time. Save my mother. Sin finished her."

Amia winced. "I'm sorry...and what about you? What happened to you?"

"I was able to escape my mother's fate, and after Sin left, the survivors regrouped. I was among them; being a lost and frightened child, of course I had no say in what they decided. And so I became a fayth, as all the others did."

"Did you understand what was happening to you?"

"They explained it to me before it happened. I was but a boy, though, and didn't really grasp the entire situation."

"If you had?"

"I'd have run to Bevelle screaming at the top of my lungs." Bahamut answered dryly, and Amia gave him a crooked smile. "But I suppose that wouldn't have been any help."

"We're grateful to you..."

"Please don't thank me. It wasn't my decision." As quickly as Amia had thought that she had gained some positive ground with Bahamut, he retreated, and seemed to adopt his original demeanor – faint scowl included.

"But you're here anyway...you're trying to help us. That deserves gratitude."

"And I want to help you, very much. But...here. Just look at this."

Bahamut touched the sphere again, and the image on the walls changed, moved. Still the middle of the night, still the death of Zanarkand. Sin, lumbering forth, passed over house and street indiscriminately. A residential complex was dwarfed in Sin's shadow and its buildings shattered like eggshells underneath. The grand illuminated walkways, as much the mysterious pride of Zanarkand as blitzball was, flickered and died at its touch, shimmering and dispersing into a sea of pyreflies – something new to Zanarkand, for faintly, she could hear shrieks of confusion and fear, and it sent a shiver down her spine.

Above the noise, Bahamut spoke to her fiercely, eyes locking with her own. His change of mood surprised her – she could see his chest move as he breathed, entire body so quickly infused with passion for what filled his heart. "Not because of this! Because of anything but this. I don't want to help you because of the past. I don't want to be constantly remembering and grieving. That's not the purpose of my life. The past makes me sick. It can't be changed. _I want to put it away!_" 

Amia, understanding, gave a small nod. "I...I'm sorry."

"You have nothing to apologize for. None of you do. Me...? A thousand years...an eternity wasted on the _past_. The past doesn't matter now – not I nor you or Tidus or Yuna or Jecht or _anyone_ should let it matter. I'm here to help you because of the future. Spira's past haunts it! My dream for Spira is to start fresh...start clean, without corruption, without false hope, without Sin."

"Why did you come here, then? Why this sphere?"

As if reminded that it even existed, Bahamut turned his attention to the sphere in question, glaring at it. He picked it up, and Amia could see the whites of his knuckles as he gripped the sides, not at all gently.

"To say goodbye!" he cried, clenching the sphere in one shaking hand. "Goodbye and good riddance!"

With one smooth movement of the arm, possessing a grace undue to children, he hurtled the sphere against the wall. Silently they both watched as it shattered and fell to the ground, releasing a clutch of pyreflies that rose from their former prison and shimmered in slow circles about the room. Bahamut stood motionless after that; Amia, refusing to break the silence, simply sat, listening to him breathe, and wishing she might be able to melt into the wall. This, she knew, was his battle, and this was not her business.

He finally turned to her after a long moment, and to her utter surprise, there were tears in his eyes.

"Do you know," Bahamut said softly, "that Tidus changed the world when he kissed Yuna just that once?"

It took a second for Amia to respond – she was thrown off guard by the change of subject, and frowned in confusion. "At Macalania?"

"It was a small act. Such a private act. But it kept her going and now we have this."

"The future, huh?"

Bahamut bowed his head. "It takes so little to change everything. And maybe...maybe..." He paused, and when his words wouldn't come, he growled in frustration. "I...if he can do something so small, unwittingly, if it's that easy...what I mean is...I'm here to help, to change things, so if I can just help to make everyone forget this wretched past and move on—"

Amia stood up and approached him; he stopped mid-sentence, puzzled. Gently, she rested her hand on his shoulder, looking down at him.

"If you're looking to change the world, Bahamut," she said softly, "you already have."

Slowly, almost embarrassedly, Bahamut reached up and grasped at the hem of her long sleeve, head bowed to avoid meeting her eyes. Amia, understanding this, drew him against her side, letting his forehead press against her stomach – watching over him silently, in respect for that side of him that treasured silence above all and was still quite off-limits, guarding even, as he clenched her shirt in a deathgrip and his shoulders shook lightly as he mutely wept.

And she thought, _He hates his body; he hates looking like such a child and being so helpless as he is; but none of us ever lose the childlike part of us that still needs other people, do we? I understand his reasons for his distance, but that we might hold back that part of ourselves...seems something like a crime, so suddenly._

_I want to understand him. But understanding Bahamut is like understanding Jecht – there's something, some rift of some sort, some grand difference that makes it nearly impossible. I don't know what Bahamut experienced in his ages as a fayth...I can only guess that it's probably those experiences which make his emotions so volatile now. Has he always been this way? _

_Or is he remembering what it's like to be truly alive? Now— now, it's as if he frightens himself. It's clear that he's frustrated with himself. It's clear that his own memory saddens him. I want to help him – but I don't know how..._

_...and maybe that's the way he feels about us...and Spira._

______________________

Woohoooo. Almost a year between updates this time.

Sorry about that, folks. You'll likely see more frequent updates after this. This chapter gave me trouble because I kept trying to make it longer than it was – none of the filler pieces worked out at ALL. Wasted time, blech. Those of you who enjoyed the longer chapters MAY be out of luck for awhile, I don't know. Filler is bad. Filler is what accounted for about a fourth, maybe a third, of this wait. I'm not going to stress if the chapters are very short. I want to finish this story – I can rewrite it later.

And hey – if I don't update often enough, just prod me along with a comment on my Livejournal. You don't have to be a member to comment or anything, and every little bit of encouragement helps. On that note, thanks to everyone who's reviewed so far – some of those reviews were really touching and really got the ball rolling on finishing my reposting. ^^ Thank you guys so much! I was very touched and it totally made my day(s). :D

Whee, birthdays have passed since I last posted! A happeh happeh birfday to Adam/No One, Noelle/Mistiza, Timmeh/Fire Rules, Aly/Evil Neko/TEH ALYCAT :O, and Merryface! My dear and notably insane friends, how I love you. 3

What I've been up to since you last saw me: hehe, swim finals were a blast last year, JV champ for 50 fly/50 back/200 medley relay and second place for the 200 free relay...woohoo. Also more swimming, more competing, some swimming, FFX-2, and for a change of pace...swimming :D And of course, glomp-bothering Adam the whole way. *heart!* ^^ Much love and thanks and general good feelings to him especially.

Thanks, too, to everyone who has beta read and/or helped me out with this chapter in any way. That counts as pretty much everyone I mentioned on the "birthday list" as well as rock-star-vt a.k.a. His Arkiness...yeah :D THANK YOU GUYS SO MUCH. I totally appreciate everything you have done for me.

As for the almost-chapterly recommendations: Video Girl Ai, Shad's favorite anime in the whole wide world (thanks to Adam, no surprise :P) and anything and everything by composers Yoko Kanno or Joe Hisaishi...mwaha.

Until next time, thanks for reading and have a happy holiday season~!  



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